10 Sex Acts Inspired by the Original American Gladiators

By Rob Bricken in Daily Lists, TV
Monday, January 21, 2008 at 8:40 am

amerglad.jpgBy Rebecca Kelley

The recent debut of the new American Gladiators on NBC doesn't hold a candle to the original show that ran from 1989 to 1996. Not only did the original version boast less padding, skimpier spandex, and the one-two punch of feathered hair and mullets, it also inspired 10 beloved sex acts that are performed by die-hard AG fans to this very day.

1) The Gladiator Arena

Two people copulate in a ring surrounded by fat, screaming fans who hold up signs ranging from “Laser Good!” and “Hard as Diamond!”, with the presence of an official ensuring that both parties demonstrate sportsmanlike conduct.

2) The Break Through and Conquer

The act of breaking through a barrier of some sort in order to slap one's partner on the head with one's member (hence, “conk her” on the head or facial region).

3) Ass-ault

Various Nerf products are projected at the anus, with extra points being awarded if a direct hit results in a gas emission.

4) Hang Tough

Two people have sex while suspended from monkey bars or rings (note: For successful execution, it is recommended to perform this sex act during closed playground hours or within the privacy of a backyard jungle gym).

5) Powerball(s)

A timed event in which the player must slap his testicles against as many openings as possible while at the same time dodging “cock blockers.”

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