By Rob Bricken in
Daily Lists, TV
Wednesday, Feb. 25 2009 @ 5:02AM
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The Mighty Morphin Power Rangers premiered on American television on August 28, 1993, and the next morning, children on playgrounds across the nation were fighting to see who would get to be the Red Ranger. Based off the Japanese Super Sentai franchise, the show mixed footage from the original program with American teenage antics. Every episode took place in the fictional town of Angel Grove, California, and followed a formula of throwing a giant monster into the lives of Jason, Kimberly, Trini, Zack, Billy, and later on, Tommy. The monsters are sent to Earth by Rita Repulsa; an evil alien witch with the imagination of a pinecone. Each monster was special in its own way, but special in the way that a mother will tell her jackass son that he's special. So Topless Roboteers, observe the viewing globe and bear witness to the worst of the worst of Rita's "special" sons.
10) Lizzinator from "Enter the...Lizzinator"
Rita makes things personal when she kidnaps Kimberly's cousin, Kelly, who is failing miserably at making the Angel Grove Jr. High cheerleading squad, then sends down the Lizzinator to destroy the Power Rangers, although the two evil deeds have nothing to do with each other. Please note this isn't the first or last time we find Rita hatching two completely unrelated schemes in one episode. The Lizzinator is a chatty Russian dragon who bears a striking resemblance to Drizzt Do'Urden; his main method of attack is pushing and throwing shit around like an incorrigible two-year-old. He manages to put up a good fight until the Green Ranger shows up and plays his queer dagger flute which summons the Dragonzord. The other Rangers summon their spirit animals and assemble the Megazord. All of this is very time-consuming and takes about two minutes, meaning the Lizzinator was forced to wait patiently while all this was going on. He uses his stink breath attack and the Rangers have no choice but to have Zord-sex and form the ridiculous Titanus Carrierzord. They unleash an epic barrage of colored lights and its curtains for Lizzinator. I know what you're wondering, and yes, Kelly does eventually make the cheerleading squad.
9) Polluticorn from "Clean Up Club"
After unleashing immeasurable carbon emissions into the atmosphere using their Zords, the Rangers give a shit about the environment all of sudden and decide to clean-up Angel Grove. They wander out with some trash bags and come across a section of Angel Grove that looks like Boston after the Sox won the series in 2004. Zack proves how good he is at multitasking by dancing like an asshole while picking up litter (which, if you look close enough, includes a fish sticking out of a pizza box). This green movement inspires Rita to unleash the Polluticorn; a monster not sculpted by Finster, it just sort of is already there. Polluticorn attacks the Rangers and it takes them about 30 seconds to realize that his horn in the source of his power. So while the other Rangers are busy battling Goldar and Scorpina (who could honestly murder the Rangers themselves if Rita wasn't such a control freak), the Red Ranger summons his Dragon Shield and cuts off Polluticorn's horn. Why not, right? Just like in every other battle, Rita goes to plan B and biggie-sizes Polluticorn. And just like in every other fight, the Rangers summon their Zords, form the Megazord, and use the Power Sword to make the monster blow the fuck up. Every time! This fight ends unusually early in the episode so the Rangers can cram more environmental awareness dribble down our throats. If we wanted this rigarimorale, we'd watch Captain Planet, thanks.
8) Goo Fish from "Something Fishy"
Add scuba-diving to the list of things Jason is wicked good at. Billy refuses to go diving and in a very tender moment, he explains to Kimberly that when he was but a boy, a fish bit him and now he's terrified of them. Why is this pussy a Power Ranger again? The omnipotent Rita Repulsa overhears Billy's anecdote and casts a spell on him which makes him go uncontrollably loco in the presence of a fish. Finster then constructs the Goo Fish to spook Billy and destroy the Rangers. The design of Goo Fish is really awesome, but you sort of forget about all that when he shoots silly string out of his mouth, causing the sound of fireworks to ring out. It's really an alarming image and ruins a great monster design. The fight that follows is pretty standard except that Goo Fish actually manages to knock down Megazord - we know it's down because they use a Dutch angle. The Rangers than pull some new magic out of their hat's and convert Goo Fish's venomous silly string into energy and...huh? Yeah, Jason punches a button or two and the venom converts to energy for the Megazord. Then you can probably guess what happens but in case you can't, they summon the Power Sword and blow Goo Fish up. Fin.
7) Grumble Bee from "Grumble Bee"
This episode starts out with Billy getting a 'B' on a test and after that, the B-related jokes never stop coming. "Hey Billy, wouldn't want to B ya!" This all inspires Rita to make a Bee monster while Billy is studying Bees. Sigghhhhhh. This episode is another example of how Goldar could seriously execute every Power Ranger if given the chance by Rita. He manages to wrap the Rangers up in a Wonder Woman lasso and is then forced to leave them there so the Grumble Bee can finish the job. The GB can shoot stingers out of his fingers and spit ultrasonic booms and yeah, he's got some silly string too (maybe this was left over from the Goo Fish episode, I dunno). The Rangers defeat him in the usual formulaic manner that should be familiar with you all by now: Rita makes him big -- summon Megazord -- Megazord punches him in the chest -- Rangers summon the MegaSword -- Billy wishes he could bang Kimberly -- call it a night.
6) Socadillo from "Second Chance"
Just to get his out of the way right off the bat: Skylar Deleon is in this episode. Skylar is the dude currently on Death Row for tying a couple to an anchor and hucking them into the Pacific. He may have also tried to cut his own penis off while in jail. Before he did all this, Skylar was on Power Rangers and he sucked at soccer. Rita decides to riff off of this and summons the Socadilllo. It's unclear what exactly what the Socadillo's power is, but it seems that he can absorb energy and when he rolls around, the Rangers do crazy gymnastics. He gangs up against the Rangers with a grip of Putties and following the formula of the later first season episodes, the Green Ranger steps in and beats the shit out of everything wearing earth-tones. Rita enlarges Socadillo, Rangers summon the Megazord and Dragonzord, stab him with the Power Sword, and that's that. Future-lunatic Skylar makes the team in the end, laying out his future of privilege and murder.
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41 comments
Comments
Kevin said:
Oh man, the memories. I was old enough when Power Rangers was on to recognize that every episode's monster battle followed the exact same plot - putties attack, followed by regular version of Monster, who the Power Rangers manage to best. Then the monster grows in size, followed by the Power Rangers calling on their Zords, who get their asses kicked until they combine into Megazord and obliterate the big monster. You would think the Rangers would have justed summoned Megazord right off the bat and squished the tiny version of the monster. But that was all fine, as the show managed to be entertaining due to how mind-boggingly weird it was. Great list! Pumpkin Rapper was classic!
The Red Queen said:
Funny list. Unfortunately the monsters haven't gotten any better. My 4-year-old son is an avid fan and we have to rummage up old tapes and DVDs at tag sales for him. The lamest monsters I've ever seen comes from Dinothunder series, which include Copyotter from the episode "Copy That." It's a cross between a copy machine, otter and apparently some red and green peppers. All the monsters on that show are mutated messes with lame purposes.
Zach Oat said:
I can appreciate that some of you grew up with the Power Rangers, and take this stuff pretty seriously, but the write-up about how ineffectual and stupid Polluticorn was kinda glossed over the fact that he's an EVIL POLLUTING UNICORN.
I don't know, maybe the ridiculousness gets to be old hat after you watch a bunch of episodes, and part of the show's charm. (Thereby proving the old maxim, "If a Power Rangers villain is too weird, you're too old.") But every new PR bad guy I learn about makes my head explode knowing that anyone watches this show.
Aaron said:
This is one of those shows I loved as a kid but looking back, I have no clue why.
Good list.
Magical Shrimp said:
As if I wasn't enough of a social pariah in grade school, I was a huge fan of this show in about Grade 5 or 6. Not having a death wish, though, I kept it a secret. I'm ashamed to admit my first crush was on a Power Ranger!
zsasz said:
memories memories. id like to say how lame it looks over the years...but even as a kid i thought it was lame, in the most awersome way of course. the red dude with the mask was the best character ever (forget his name but he was one of the main villains - zordon was it or something like that?)
Isaia said:
Great stuff! I'm surprised how many of these I remembered. Mr. Ticklesneezer can suck it!
chad said:
the list shows why power rangers are int he same area as tickle me Elmo and the old formula of what pats work keep them even if runs the thing into the ground. not to mention always wondered if the execs who came up with the monsters were on some bad drug or their minds were shut off after seeing the original version of the show
cKHAVIKk said:
A Power Rangers daily list?
Really?
Epic fail, homie.
Bill said:
I'm in my 30's, so I remember the ORIGINAL Power Rangers...Voltron, Defender of the Universe! Same colors, same formulaic battles, same giant monster of the week, everything.
By the way, the Pink Ranger was hot!
whipple said:
I haven't thought about this show in over a decade. So much just flooded back into my brain. Thanks for this.
Niko said:
Ah, the memories. Glued to my TV Saturday mornings as these episodes first aired. Fun times. It's always nice to see so many MMPR clips on youtube, as Disney would never be nice enough to actually release the original seasons on DVD.
So Bill, you remember Goranger, the original Super Sentai team that Power Rangers is adapted from and predates Voltron by 9 years and even Golion by 6?
Liz said:
Oy, I avoided this show like the plague when I was in high school, and it seems like that was the wise path to take. As a side note, I've known quite a few deaf people who are fantastic dancers. How? Bass lines, dude...they can feel them if the bass is cranked up enough. I lived in a mostly-deaf dorm in college, and the walls were constantly vibrating because the deaf kids were partying.
thew40 said:
Great list, though Grumble-Bee didn't look too terrible.
AndrewMTC said:
Did Mr. Ticklesneezer just bottle Angel Grove's Tokyo Tower?
I've always loved how, depending on the scene, Angel Grove is either: a bright, sunny California beach town or a grey, slightly depressing, densely packed Japanese residential suburb.
LBD "Nytetrayn" said:
Sorry, but "queer dagger flute" made this insta-fail for me. ;P But barring that...
"Apparently, the mythology of the Power Rangers universe goes far deeper than a floating head."
Oh yes, way beyond.
Bill: "I'm in my 30's, so I remember the ORIGINAL Power Rangers...Voltron, Defender of the Universe! Same colors, same formulaic battles, same giant monster of the week, everything."
Actually, Power Rangers came first. That is, the Super Sentai show from which Power Rangers is derived. I think the same company made Voltron, anyway.
Anyway, with some odd exceptions, I'm not as big on the Mighty Morphin episodes, but things picked up a bit for Zeo, then down again for Turbo, but Power Rangers in Space was awesome, and that lasted for a good few years.
Yeah, a lot of the monsters/demons/mutants/etc. are a bit silly, but you try coming up with something different every week for over 30 years, and see how you fare. It's just par for the course, and since they're destroyed by the end of the episode anyway, who cares?
It reminds me of the people who got all pissy because the name of some Mega Man bosses were changed here and there, when they die 30 seconds after you first encounter them anyway. It's great when they are cool, but who wants to waste all the energy on a character born to die within two eyeblinks?
Yeah, a lot are silly, even ridiculous. You just have to enjoy the ride, and take it with tongue planted firmly in cheek. I imagine just about any other franchise you could name, American or Japanese, probably has some spot on its record as well.
--LBD "Nytetrayn"
Jeremy said:
A Power Rangers daily list? My dream come true. As an avid fan for all 16 years (the 17th season starts this Saturday) I loved this list. But you really shouldn't limit yourself to Rita's monsters. You could make a top 10 list of all time from Divatox's monsters in Turbo.
Yes, the monsters are almost always stupid. But sometimes it is interesting to see the themes the monsters had in the sentai version. Like one poster said, most of DinoThunder's sentai equivalent of Abaranger had monsters that were made up of a plant, an animal and some form of technology combined. The new show Shinkenger's monsters are all based on mythical sea creatures.
Also, there's a reason why a lot of the latter episodes of season one had multiple plots going on. Power Rangers was an unforseen hit. They ran out of sentai footage to adapt so they had to create new plots and reuse old monsters in slightly new situations over and over again.
I know Power Rangers isn't for everyone. But I'm sure that anyone who makes fun of it on this website can think of shows that they liked as a kid that - if they looked at it truly objectively - would be considered just as stupid.
Much love for the PR list. Bring on more of them if you can.
ryan said:
I watched Power Rangers when it premeired. I was in high school and recognized it as a practical live-action version of my beloved Voltron. Yeah, it was really silly, but it was fun too. I gave up on it after the first theatrical movie. Later on, I actually watched most of Dino Thunder as it starred Tommy, the original Green Ranger, and paid homage to the first several years of MMPR.
Jack Burden said:
Back in the late 80's, I watched Spectreman every day after school. The bad guy was a gorilla whose mouth didn't move and he'd pantomime everything he said. Otherwise you'd just be looking at a motionless gorilla with voiceover narration.
bouverie said:
Such a goofy, fun show. Pumpkin rapper, never forgot that dude.
Are they still making this show?
Totz the Plaid said:
I was in Kindergarten when the first season aired, so I was just the right age to love it without any irony. Looking back at these clips, I see that it had a level of campiness that makes it still awesome, but in a different way. I'm NOT ashamed to admit, by the way, that Kimberly was my first crush.
klinteastwood said:
wow, this is classic, i remember watching the first episode in the forth grade, i started losing interest shortly after the movie....really the most powerful monster on that list was Polluticorn, he was kicking their asses....but a list that you must do on Topless Robot is the top Power Ranger knockoffs..anyone remember VR Troopers or the insane Tattooed Teenage Alien Fighters from Beverly Hills, wow just typing that made me depressed
Jeremy said:
bouverie said:
Are they still making this show?
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Check out my first post. The 17th season of Power Rangers entitled "Power Rangers RPM" starts this Saturday.
NeoXorn said:
Super Sentai kick-ass!
Kid Nicky said:
It never ceases to amaze me how whenever Power Rangers is brought up,you always get some obnoxious "Voltron teh ORIGNIAL!!!1" from at least one person. I love Voltron and dislike PR,but let's be serious. Super Sentai predates Voltron easily,and as someone else has mentioned,at least some of the same people worked on it. Plus,weren't "gattai" mecha kind of old hat well before Super Sentai? It's not like either was the "first".
NIK said:
Pumpkin Rapper was epic, but I seem to remember a particularly dumb monster that was a giant purse.
Arcane said:
I gotta echo the love of PR in Space. The writing was pretty clever, the villain was a hot chick, and the Yellow Ranger was stupid hot. The best episode was where the villain disguises herself as the yellow ranger, double extra hottness in yellow spandex. Even better, the show is so self-aware that Red Ranger picks out which is the real Yellow by having them both attempt their idiotic sentai pose, which the villain bungles.
I also watched Mystic Knights of Tir na Nog like it was my job. Angus was the man.
GreyFox 00 said:
looking back this show was not very good. Kimberly was hot though. And sane straight male will still take the pink ranger any day.
The new one is gonna suck b/c the zords talk. just youtube it.
LBD "Nytetrayn" said:
Arcane> Right on. I'd take Ashley and Cassie over Kimberly any day.
Really, martial arts action, cool mecha/vehicles, sci-fi weapons, awesome villains (not the "Monster of the Day" ones so much, guys like Zedd, Goldar, and Ecliptor), and chicks in spandex. What's not to like about Power Rangers?
And Mystic Knights was cool, though it kind of turned me off when they had these awful looking vehicles that I think were bad CG introduced.
--LBD "Nytetrayn"
Willis said:
To Bill who thought Voltron was first...no the Rangers were first back in mid 70's. The ones that hit the US in the early 90's were probably like the 12th installment of the series Super Sentai shows in Japan.
And to the person who said they were made by the same company yeah Voltron was done by Toei as with most Japanese robot cartoons and Toei did alot of live action sentai/Tokusatsu shows.
I know Im a nerd, blah blah yeah yeah, heard it all before. Im 30yrs old and still will have the rangers on in teh background sometimes while I work. There corny but its acquired taste for sure. I actually just started watching the newest series Shinkenger which just recently debuted in Japan and went back to its roots being more of a Samurai based theme using the kanji symbols for symbols on there helmet.
GreyFox 00 said:
WHAT THE HECK WERE THE PUTTIES MADE OUT OF?
It 's like they get hit and they spark and smoke.
what would they have done if the deaf girl couldn't write or if everyone else wasdyslexic ?
Drix G said:
Nicely done. We need lists like these once in a while. About #10 on the list, I thought Lizzinator was Austrian like the Governator? He did sound more German when I watched the clip.
Jeremy said:
GreyFox 00 said:
The new one is gonna suck b/c the zords talk. just youtube it.
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How is that a reason to determine the quality of a show? Also, the mecha talked in Abaranger but they didn't in it's counterpart, DinoThunder. So it's not a given.
Llewelyn said:
Topless - Because of you I spent all of last night watching old MMPR on YouTube instead of getting anything productive done. God bless you.
GreyFox 00 said:
Jeremy said:
GreyFox 00 said:
The new one is gonna suck b/c the zords talk. just youtube it.
---
How is that a reason to determine the quality of a show? Also, the mecha talked in Abaranger but they didn't in it's counterpart, DinoThunder. So it's not a given.
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not a useful hey we should do this type of talk. more of a sterotypical type of talk with annoying catch-phrases.
that and its gonna be domesticated with anti drug and make sure you drink your milk speches.
but this is all my opinion
K_Ag said:
I agree that the Grumble Bee isn't that bad, but my Lord,these other fuckers...
gab said:
What about the one where they fight the giant Pachinko machine?
LBD "Nytetrayn" said:
Gab> I think that was one of Lord Zedd's monsters.
--LBD "Nytetrayn"
Nick said:
i have to say i was one of those kids that was a freak for this show. haveing to see those clips i know how much kids can eat bull. but i think i just found why i love godzilla moives so much.
Craig M. said:
Just to clarify the whole "who came first" thing, Gatchaman came first when you're talking about 5-member super teams made up of teenagers that fight a monster every week in a formulaic battle.
