Al Qaeda dislikes the US military presence in the middle east, which is kinda the antithesis of freedom.

The book that came with Fode & Beed has "8 Info-Packed Pages". I barely even remember the guy existed and he has an 8 page bio?!

the list proves that George Lucas had lost his mind and only did the prequels for the money from the fans. as for why the Baron figure is sad is because he knows no more star wars films to get more fans money and also make more evil figures like on the list

Sakhalin, you're at the wrong site.
Daily Kos is that-a-way!

Fode & Beed remind me of the Blitzball announcers from FFX.

Sakhalin what the fudgesicle are you saying. Al Qaeda hates freedom or US military presence causes a lack of freedoms for the Al Qaeda members?

"Without getting off on too much of a tangent about how awful the prequel's CGI characters are compared to the foam and latex creatures that populated the original trilogy"

Thank you! I've been saying that for years and people just shrug it off. Despite what they tell you Cheaper/Quicker does not equal Better people.

I'm suprised that I don't see the Tusken Raider with Child two pack on this list.

http://image50.webshots.com/150/6/11/1/448361101Jlaonm_ph.jpg

That, to me was the absolutely lamest figure set ever released. Did Hasbro really expect kids everywhere to want to rush out and buy this? What kid in their right mind would pick this set over figures of Anakin or Obi-Wan or Mace Windu? No, this set was specifically designed to be purchased by unknowing parents or senile grandparents who think their kids will love them for getting something with the Star Wars logo on it. I'm convinced that receiving this figure set is legal grounds for disowning your parents.

And let's be serious for a second here. What did every single kid who was unfortunate enough to receive this set do with it? The reinacted the scene of Anakin slaughtering that Tusken village. Over and over again this poor woman and her child were mercilessly cut down by Anakin's glowing blue blade of vengence. Hasbro may as well have called the toys the Slaughtered Mother and Child Two Pack because that's really all they were good for.

In all honesty, I think this set would have sold a lot better if the mother and child had come with removeable limbs and heads so that kids everywhere could more accurately play out the scene of mini-genocide that Anakin committed that day in the deserts of Tattooine.

I'm suprised that I don't see the Tusken Raider with Child two pack on this list.

http://image50.webshots.com/150/6/11/1/448361101Jlaonm_ph.jpg

That, to me was the absolutely lamest figure set ever released. Did Hasbro really expect kids everywhere to want to rush out and buy this? What kid in their right mind would pick this set over figures of Anakin or Obi-Wan or Mace Windu? No, this set was specifically designed to be purchased by unknowing parents or senile grandparents who think their kids will love them for getting something with the Star Wars logo on it. I'm convinced that receiving this figure set is legal grounds for disowning your parents.

And let's be serious for a second here. What did every single kid who was unfortunate enough to receive this set do with it? The reinacted the scene of Anakin slaughtering that Tusken village. Over and over again this poor woman and her child were mercilessly cut down by Anakin's glowing blue blade of vengence. Hasbro may as well have called the toys the Slaughtered Mother and Child Two Pack because that's really all they were good for.

In all honesty, I think this set would have sold a lot better if the mother and child had come with removeable limbs and heads so that kids everywhere could more accurately play out the scene of mini-genocide that Anakin committed that day in the deserts of Tattooine.

Sakhalin, have you ever asked any Muslim women under Al Qaeda's regimes if they believe their base freedom is respected?

A few things:

1. The "plan" to assassinate Padme was never supposed to succeed. The whole point of it was to manipulate Anakin into being alone with Padme for an extended period of time, out of the influence of his master who was busy tracking down the assassin and making the convenient and tempting discovery that the Republic has an army of clones, all ready for an upcoming war. In short, Palpatine was luring Anakin into an attachment with Padme which would make him easier to turn to the dark side, and luring the Republic into an unnecessary war that would put him in a position of power and allow him to eliminate the Jedi. Everything went exactly as it was supposed to, despite how fucked up it looked.

2. I was under the impression that death sticks were a drug, not unlike heroin, and a quick check at Wookieepedia confirms it: They aren't cigarettes. They're a hallucinogenic that can, indeed, kill you.

3. Yoda might have said he would "miss" Chewbacca, and I suppose that is a mild form of attachment, but I think he meant it as a final good-bye, as he believe either he or the wookiees would be dead soon. Either way, that's pretty mild attachment compared to Anakin's deep-rooted mommy issues, and his obsession with Padme. Jedi can like, miss, and appreciate people, but they're not supposed to become so attached to someone that they make rash decisions because of it. While Yoda might miss Chewbacca, he wouldn't jeopardize the rest of the galaxy to save Chewbacca's life. That, I think, is the distinction. Yoda doesn't go to extremes. Anakin always did.

4. I always hoped "jawa juice" was a metaphorical name, and not a literal description of the beverage. One pictures a factory in which jawas are squeezed by either large droids, or wookiees, until their juice flows into jars which are then packaged, labeled, and shipped to diners all across the galaxy.

This list is filled with even more unwarranted hate than usual, but I guess that is really just a difference of degree. However, there are some parts of this list that are just plain stupid.

First of all, are you complaining about these figures from the point of view of a child, or an adult collector. you go back and forth, and I can understand the resentment of a collector at the production of unimportant characters. But I think that Polis Massan, Dud and Mars, Fode and Beed, Jedi Younglings, and Yadddle would be FREAKIN SWEET to play with as a kid.

The first 4 are all visually very cool looking, they would be awesome to play with. Child Jedis that you don't really know the names of are perfect for kids to play with and pretend that THEY are child Jedis on some adventure with a better known adult. Yaddle would be fun to team up with Yoda and have some sweet Tridactyl adventures.

Also, what is with hating on Muppet Babies out of nowhere? The Muppet Babies are absolutely awesome, it was a great show.

And you say "UNFORTUNATELY for us, no "Dark Side Rage Victim" version of this two-pack was ever offered." So toys of Jedi younglings suck, but toys of dead Jedi younglings would be OK? That is F-ed up.

In closing: Irrational hatred is great if it makes me laugh, but hating for hating's sake is just pathetic sour grapes. This list is basically just a thinly veiled rehash of the general anti-prequel hate that we have all heard before. Come on, a list should be funny or nostalgic, this is just complaining.

I have pretended star wars 1,2, and 3 never happened. Well, maybe parts of 3 happened but not all of it. Therefore all of these action figures never existed. I'll be going back to my sand to bury my head again.

Well said ZeroCorpse. Especially #3. The Jedi council was wary about Anakin from the very beginning, so it makes sense that they would be extra vigilant about him following the rules.

This sense is full of nonsensicalness. Yeah, that's right. Nonsensicalness

Oops, I meant "list." The list is full of nonsensicalness

You've gotta Avoid-a the Papanoida. He ruins franchises.

Wow, I don't even recognize a lot of these characters. I couldn't see myself wanting to play with these as a kid though. That podracer in 11&12 with the goggles and big blue nose looks kind of cool though. I can't remember if there were podracer toys that fit the action figures. If so, I think pilot figures like that would be necesary.

There's was a sidewalk-sale one time with Attack of the Clones action figures, so I picked up a bunch without really caring about them. One of them was Taun We (Kamino Cloner), and it just might be the worst action figure ever. I think it has all of four points of articulation, hands that hold nothing, and it's legs are so thin that they bend and warp on their own. Also, it can't stand up on it's own, and any circumstances, even if proped up, and it's legs don't bend to sit it down. Also, I have no fucking clue what the accessory is supposed to be. Then there was the Tusken Raider (Female With Tusken Child), so you can renenact Anakin killing a bunch of women and children because his mom he hasn't bothered to talk to in twelve years pulled a Padame. You know you're central to the story when your action figure doesn't even have a proper name.
I honestly pity some the of the collector spending thousands of dollars, if not tens of thousands, to complete their Star Wars collection, when the product isn't that good to begin with. A lot of these figures can't even be posed properly, and I've seen sprawling, twenty-foot displays with them set up in toy stores. They just look awkward with their straight arms and legs and blank expressions on faces that look nothing like the actors portraying them.

"1. The "plan" to assassinate Padme was never supposed to succeed. The whole point of it was to manipulate Anakin into being alone with Padme for an extended period of time, out of the influence of his master who was busy tracking down the assassin and making the convenient and tempting discovery that the Republic has an army of clones, all ready for an upcoming war. In short, Palpatine was luring Anakin into an attachment with Padme which would make him easier to turn to the dark side, and luring the Republic into an unnecessary war that would put him in a position of power and allow him to eliminate the Jedi. Everything went exactly as it was supposed to, despite how fucked up it looked."

All well and good except that NOBODY except Palpatine knew about the plan to turn Anakin. And only he and Dooku knew about the plan to manipulate the Republic into war.

Jango had no idea what was going on, so why wouldn't he have done the job he was paid to do?

@Shmedrick

It sounds like you're missing context. The muppet babies comment, as just one example, are a JOKE in reference to a good show paving the way for bad shows(baby loony toons).

Yaddle. Frickin' Yaddle. Talk about creative bankruptcy...

But, this might be your best list yet, Chris. Very well done. And as for "Zerocorpse" and whining pandering to Lucas is concerned, ...you'll surely scream in Hell forever for making apologies for those fucking worthless prequels. Totally contemptuous "filmmaking" on every level.

No, actually the muppet babies did suck.

@ Schmedrick

I always enjoy people who come in and bash the article writer for bashing something they personally enjoy like they could possibly have a logic-leg to stand on.

Sorry your feelings are hurt, but talk about over-analyzation of something that was meant to entertain. I bet you're a real scream at parties.

I hated Fode and Bede even more than Jar-Jar. The reason that pod-race sequence seems so long is that we have to listen to these two morons describe what we're seeing in the most annoying way possible.

These guys are like rejects from the Star Wars Christmas Special.

...Let us not forget that Elian Sleazbaganno caught a significant amount of flack because the character got publicity as supposedly being a parody of Elian Gonzales, the Cuban boy refugee that Janet Reno kidnapped and sent him back to live out the rest of his youth as Fidel "Stogie" Castro's little pet love toy. It wasn't intended as such, but let's also remember that the Fourth Estate can be really frackheaded at times. While this was going on Latino Review was claiming that Jango Fett was stereotyping Hispanics as killers-for-hire, and the actor was about as Hispanic as Geraldo Rivera(*) or Black as the radio voices of Amos & Andy.

(*) Who *is* Jewish, not Hispanic, BTW.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eTqXyAbbBlA

Click the above link to see Baron Papanoida in action... producing Indy 4!

The list was great, but then again, I always enjoy articles by Chris. But I have to say something to Shmedrick, dude, relax. Everyone knows that nerds need to complain about the franchises they enjoy. It doesn't make any sense, it's just what happens. To the Muppet Babies comment, when a franchise takes something really awesome and then turns it into a baby it kind of ruins everything forever. Muppet Babies were great, padawan action figures not so much.

Hate to nitpick, but it appears to be "Mars Guo," not "Quo."

--LBD "Nytetrayn"

These toys, much like everything Lucas has created since 1980, are terrible. The prequels sucked. These toys blow. Great column Cummins. Enjoy your day!

These toys, much like everything Lucas has created since 1980, are terrible. The prequels sucked. These toys blow. Great column Cummins. Enjoy your day!

Nope, the worst prequel figure is Dexter Jester. That fat greasy 4 armed line cook is in the worst scene in the history of Star Wars. Every time I see that scene I want to die.