Be happy the Devastator toy from BK doesn't include a pair of swinging testicles between the legs. On second thought maybe it would improve the toy.

I wish McDonalds had gotten the toy rights. Transformer Madame Alexander dolls, anyone?

I'm wondering if Lorenzo Di Bonaventura is trying to distract from the crappiness of GI Joe with the crappiness of Transformers 2. He's the common thread here, folks.

I just wish McDonald's had gotten the toy rights. Transformers Madame Alexander dolls, anyone?

While shitty the BK version is no worse than the shit-heap up on the screen in the film and will certainly be less expensive and ultimately less disappointing than the fugly crap-fest that is the Hasbro version.

As someone else so sagely pointed out on another board at least you get a burger with it......and mulched Cow-testicle is probably less revolting to digest than watching Devastator swing his pair over that poor pyramid.

Have you guys tried the new BK Double Stackticon burger at Burger King? Its basically a BK Double Stacker with BBQ sauce instead of 1000 Island Dressing....AND IT TASTES LIKE GOD!!!! Seriously...its ALMOST delicious enough to justify this horrible,horrible movie....almost. Get it with a side of o-rings for extra deliciousness....

... Michael Bay teabagging you in the face, pantsless, forever.

@Aeon: I must have a set of those for my daughter.

I just went to see ROTF. It was awesome. I'm sorry, but it's not the 1980's anymore. Kids like CGI now.

i WILL have at least three of those Snicker in my Belly before the weekend.

Snickers has made some questionable moves lately. So the Nougabot Bar isn't that unexpected. They've got a billboard up by my house that says something about having a "Hungerectomy". Not particularly appetizing...

The Transformers Snickers still looks more appealing than the Shrek Snickers ever was: http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_8JzldfDvJ2s/RpFCULfHAkI/AAAAAAAAAMo/N8WrRJ__Llo/s1600-h/shreksnick2.jpg

Kids also like to play the choking game, Jason; that doesn't make it any more acceptable.

"...which should easily make any child weep at realizing the cruel indifference of the world"

"...making the whole thing weird and unpleasant and kind of scary"

I'm sorry are you talking about the tie-in or the movie here?

OnanRulz, What do you mean, "Acceptable"? Most children of today are growing up with CGI, it's what they're used to.

Jason: No one would bitch if it was GOOD.

In fact, the SFX are the least objectionable parts of the movies (well, they were in the first one). Bay's directing style, the horrible designs, the lack of anything even resembling a plot... that's why fans hate these movies. I think people realise the only way to pull a Transformers movie off is using CGI.

Hell, ask most TF fans what their favourite series are and half of them will name one that was *entirely* CGI - Beast Wars. The difference is that BW wasn't shitty.

What they're used to, Jason, should not necessitate adoption to the status quo. Just because they see a lot of CGI does not make it any less an inhuman technology.

I love Pixar as much as the next guy; they actually put an effort into the technology, using the tool to create a new art form. But directors who cannot see the disjoint of mixing awkward and unecessary CGI sequences with live-action are not making art, they are stylistically crippling their product while pretending it's art.

Personally...I see things like:

1) taglines like "powerful trucks are the arms and legs of this mighty robot!"

2) a candy bar in the US called "NOUGABOT"

3) longbowhunter's reference of a BK tie-in burger called a "DOUBLE STACKTICON"

as the most awesome & amazing things since KFC's BSG "frak"pack. maybe even better.

The tie ins are the worst part of big studio blockbusters. And the really crazy part is making kid's toys for movies that are borderline appropriate for anyone under 13. Not this movie, but ones for Ghost Rider and so on? Really, Hollywood?

I mean, the toys for Cameron's Avatar are due to come out months before the movie (helloooo spoilers!) and there's no clue what it will be rated yet. (I know they're aiming for PG-13, but Cameron is better at R stuff)

Is it me or does that BK toy abomination look like the Cloverfield monster with accident-at-the-lego-factory melted on legs?

Just me?

Must stop drinking and posting

@ Stephen

Silly little man, of course people would complain even if it were perfect!

Bay could have made a magical, flawless movie that satisfied every fan's wildest dreams, and SOMEONE would bitch that not enough effort was made to reanimate the corpses of Chris Latta and Scatman Crothers so they could voice Starscream and Jazz.

Bay could have made a magical, flawless movie

just proves parmount is following the old watchman play book merchidise and hedge its bets with trof. that candy bar is nasty looking the yellow stuff and thankfully bk somehow managed to wind up with a devistator that is missing a certain thing. mostly for the kids and to avoid the parents who would scream if it came iwth its nuts

I just saw Revenge of the Fallen, and it was the dumbest piece of shit ever. All the robots sans Fallen, Megatron, Prime, Ravange and Soundwave (The five minutes of screen time he got) are comical relief, I shit you not.

I had low expactations, and the movie managed to be worse then I could even imagine.

ROBOT FARTS?! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH MICHAEL BAY?

"Bay could have made a magical, flawless movie that satisfied every fan's wildest dreams, and SOMEONE would bitch that not enough effort was made to reanimate the corpses of Chris Latta and Scatman Crothers so they could voice Starscream and Jazz."

True enough. Good thing, then, that Bay seems determined to make sure there's plenty of material each time out for both fan and non-fan critics to point out. He makes it all to easy to point out how bad his product is.

Oh, and on the toy thing: give the Batman Begins toys credit for not spoiling the movie's big swerve. I expect the Avatar toys will be the same way, although being clueless about the series I've got no idea if there's anything TO be spoiled.

Guess Im the only one here that's a sucker for this special edition yellow candy bar. Yellow nougat looks tasty, bring on the food dye! Well.. I'll let you all know if my crap is "special edition" tomorrow.

"I just went to see ROTF. It was awesome. I'm sorry, but it's not the 1980's anymore. Kids like CGI now."
Saw a midnight showing last night, it was enjoyable, which was a pleasant surprise.

I also found out that apparently Bay will not be working on Transformers 3.

and I almost want those decepticon jeans...

I just got back from seeing the movie.

It confirmed my suspicions that life is irrelevant.
EVERYBODY COMES BACK TO LIFE! Jeezus, we see Bonecrusher and Blackout with no explaination as to what the hell they're doing not DEAD. Demolisher gets a hole put in his face by Prime and dies, then is magicly fine later on to form part of Devastator.
The movie is full of unexplained bullshit! For instance, how exactily does Devastator continue to crawl around on the pyramid when his components are down on the ground fighting? Or, where the hell did Wheelie go after he was done humping Mikala's leg? How did Megatron get all the way back to Cybertron and back to earth in like, a day and a half?
WHY THE FUCK DOES DEVASTATOR HAVE BALLS.
Why is the afterlife just a mountain with a bunch of old autobots on it?
WHY THE FUCK DOES DEVASTATOR HAVE BALLS?!?!
Why does Arcee have one line in the whole movie, uttered a second before being put down by a decepticon?
...WHY DOES DEVASTATOR HAVE BALLS?!?!?!?!?!

..My head hurts...

"I just saw Revenge of the Fallen, and it was the dumbest piece of shit ever. All the robots sans Fallen, Megatron, Prime, Ravage and Soundwave (The five minutes of screen time he got) are comical relief, I shit you not."

you left these out of your list: Arcee, Chromia, Devastator, Scalpel (The Doctor), Starcream, Ironhide, Ratchet, Jetfire, the robots that made the tomb out of themselves, Alice, Jolt, Sideswipe, Sideways, and all the Constructicons. Oh, and Demolishor and Bumblebee.

If you look at it realistically, there are only 3 comic-relief robots in the film. (Skids, Mudflap, and Wheelie.)

NorthSteve, as for Bonecrusher and Blackout, "Grindor, similar to Blackout from the 2007 movie. Grindor shares both Blackout's MH-53 Pave Low helicopter alt mode, and his robot model, being only differentiated by a lighter paint job and different head model."- Wikipedia. and Bonecrusher's vehicle mode makes a cameo. as for Arcee, Bay didn't like her. As for Devastator's Decepticles, It's called humor. as for Megatron's quick trip to Cybertron, HE'S A FUCKING ROBOT ALIEN JET. As for the other stuff, and most of the stuff i just answered, you're being too nitpicky.

Onanrulz, I get your point about Pixar (although it seems to contradict your "inhuman technology" hyperbole), but you forgot one thing. How exactly could these Transformer films be done with models? CG is the ONLY way you can have a live-action TF movie. Concede that at least. And yes I'm in the biz and yes I know and love the oldschool stuff.

John Lasseter said a computer no more 'does' computer animation (outside secondary stuff like procedural/physics sims) than a pencil 'does' pencil animation. People are responsible for both.

Jason said: "If you look at it realistically, there are only 3 comic-relief robots in the film. (Skids, Mudflap, and Wheelie.)"

Wonderful. So the two African-American-themed robots are comic relief? And I'm supposed to feel good about this? I feel disgusted.

Michael Bay is guilty of crimes against humanity, and I can prove it. It's his fault "Pearl Harbor" happened.

I also think that NorthSteve forgot to ask why Devastator has balls.

About the Snickers bar, does that mean we might see Mr T Riding a Transformer in a commercial?

Just for you, Topless Robot fans:
http://www.proprofs.com/quiz-school/story.php?title=transformers-2-personality-quiz

Eh I didn't think Pearl Harbor was that bad.

http://io9.com/5301898/michael-bay-finally-made-an-art-movie

Very entertaining movie. Shia is amazing. Pearl Harbor wasnt that bad. It a fucking Transformers movie. This isnt work from Martin Scorsese. Are you looking for an Academy Award winning movie? This movie is for entertainment so the little details everyone is bitching about is highly irrelevant!

That Guy said:

"Very entertaining movie. Shia is amazing. Pearl Harbor wasnt that bad. It a fucking Transformers movie. This isnt work from Martin Scorsese. Are you looking for an Academy Award winning movie?"

Nobody is saying that the movie has to be up to the standard of the Godfather or whatever. It just has to be good enough for us not to be drawn out of our suspention of disbelief ever couple of minutes. You seem to be implying that there's only 2 levels of movie making: Very Good or entertaining to people who don't care how bad everything else is as long as there are explosions and hot babes. Is it too much to ask for something in-between?

The real atrocity of the Nougabot bar is sacrificing .2 oz of Snickers for food dye. Criminal!

And my dad hated Pearl Harbor, and he's like, old.

I haven't seen ROTF and I never, ever will and here's why... The first one was without question the worst fucking movie I have ever seen in my goddamn life! No way the sequel is getting my money.

Worst scene for me? When the kid with the video camera is running from the fireballs from the sky and exclaims "This is a hundred times cooler than Armageddon, swear to god!" Michael Bay, one of the few men in nature with the ability to suck his own dick!

I didn't see it in the theater but I know a friend who walked out because he thought it was a steaming pile of crap as well! I saw it at a friends house and he couldn't believe I hated it, but my god do I. Now if as people are saying, ROTF is even worse than the first and it makes a shitload of money, lord help us all.

I was a huge Transformers fan as a kid, had all the toys and loved them and no there's no rose tinted glasses here cos most of us still love that shit even now, it boggles my mind how someone could so massively screw a Transformers movie up. Give me the money, i'll do it! The same shits happened to GI Joe too!

Something else as well, Spielberg has gone down in my estimation after these dung fests and the last Indy movie, what happened to the guy? How in his mind did he sit there looking at these Transformers movies and think "yeah that's great"? After all the great movies he's made? What the hell? Makes me think that South Park was right. It just obvious that it's all about the money now and Hollywood is getting worse, this saddens me....

Rant over.

There's nothing wrong with CGI, just when it is used for evil like this.

a friend of mine just saw the movie and told me it was complete trash and a waste of his time. I'm never going to watch it. I'll be breaking out the original animated movie instead.

To be fair,Devastator made more sense in the movies than in the series.

Actually, NorthSteve. I can explain one more thing: Demolishor wasn't a Constructicon.

Giving a robot giant wrecking ball testicles somehow fails to register as humor to me. Same with Jetfire farting out a parachute and three counts of humping. (2 dog, 1 wheelie)
But i'll buy the Grindor explaination. Bonecrusher? I'm still confused by, cameo or not, he's dead.
Still irritating me is how we see several constructicons (not counting Demolisher now) in the final battle even as Devastator crawls around on the pyramid.

And sorry for dwelling on the decepticles earlier, but it stuck out like a burning sliver in my mind when i returned home from the theater and posted before.

My god, i hope that rumor of Bay not working on TF3 is true.