I've seen and reported on a lot of crazy fucking nerds during my tenure at TR, but no amount of fan insanity has prepared me for the depraved love of some nerds for the movie Superman Returns. Yes, there's apparently a group of people -- not just one deranged soul, as you might expect -- who are petitioning Warner Bros. to release a Director's Cut of Bryan Singer's Superman movie, because... I have no idea. I cannot fathom why anyone would want a longer version of that terrible, terrible movie.
These poor fans/bastards released the above trailer with "exciting" new shots of Routh's Superman in a black Kryptonian suit, which apparently got cut originally. And that made me slightly interested, even though he's shown just standing around, until the trailer showed actual footage from the movie and I remember how boring and misguided it was. Singer's movie was a big fat love letter to the Christopher Reeve Superman movies, and not Superman the character at all -- I still can't believe how much Singer got wrong. No joke, and no hyperbole -- I truly enjoyed both Fantastic Four movies more than Returns.
If Warner Bros. took out anything from Singer's "vision," I'm pretty sure it wasn't action scenes -- it was more likely even more footage of Superman standing around and moping, or Lex Luthor and his crew's sub-three Stooges antics, or Lois' terrifyingly inappropriate child and utterly boring family life. The idea of being forced to watch even more of Singer's vision makes me both mad and scared. Luckily, these crazy fools are so insane they've decided to campaign via internet petition, so I think I'm going to be safe. (Via Newsarama)
Comments
Adam said:
I wouldn't mind seeing the footage that was cut of Superman in space flying around what is left of Krypton as that was finished and even included on trading cards and stuff.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 03:26:57 PM
keith said:
I agree with Rob 100%. Superman III & IV were better than Superman Returns.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 03:33:23 PM
Greg said:
Kevin Freakin Spacey couldn't save that movie.
Nuff said.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 03:34:43 PM
Anonymous said:
@keith
Okay, I didn't like Returns that much, but there's no way in hell it's worse then III and IV.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 03:51:11 PM
Plaidstallions said:
Great, more haunting scenes where Superman doesn't speak, that'll make it better.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:05:12 PM
Geoff said:
This thing was such a shock to the system - after 20 years of Superman being made more accessible and appealing, it turned back the clock to the pre-Byrne era yet failed to catch the miraculous lightning in a bottle that Donner did by making something watchable out of pre-Crisis Superman.
I may bitch about Smallville's shitty writing, but it was far better than Returns.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:07:09 PM
Batzarro said:
I remember a cereal promotion for the movie that had cutout "cards" for the film. There was, as far as I can remember, one for Superman, one for Lex Luthor, one for Lois and one for...Space. You know, the vacuum outside of our planet. The movie was so bland and devoid of interesting characters and action they had to sell kids "SPACE" as a feature in it.
Well, I'm sure people who already like the movie will enjoy the shots of Superman on the nuked up Krypton, and maybe they'd include the bit where Luthor actually used his contacts to dupe Superman into going to space by faking Krypton being found by Scientists. (Though wouldn't Superman just squint and see it's still nuked, huh? And doesn't that make Luthor's plan look THRICE as stupid?) Me, I don't care much for a Superman movie that doesn't make him the main character.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:09:47 PM
Krutz said:
This wasn't a Superman movie. This was Bryan singer filming a multi-million dollar love note to Richard Donner.
And that trailer makes me more angry about "Superman Lifts" than I was before, given the halfway-decent action shots. Singer screwed up royally and now it'll be another twenty years before anyone has a chance to do a decent Superman movie again.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:33:30 PM
Xenos said:
Dammit.... that almost made it look like a good movie... which it wasn't. The sad thing is that the cast could have worked, but they were wasted as mere photocopies of the original film. Routh and Spacey in particular could have made damn good in their roles, but they were never given a good Sueprman and Luthor to work with. Hell, Boswoth might have made a good Lois, but her character was crapped on the worst. So much disappointment in that film.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:34:11 PM
klaatu said:
Just....just leave that piece of crap Superman Returns alone...
I still , to this day, cannot believe I waited almost 20 years for another (good) Superman movie and THAT was what I got. Superman Returns was a big steaming pile of shit and the only thing it accomplished was killing the fanchise for another 20 years. Thank you, Bryan Synger, for ruining not one, but TWO franchises ( You left X-men for the hack Rattner to take over , so you´re guilty of that too)
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:34:42 PM
Nicnac said:
Superman Returns was FINE as a starter to a new franchise.
The worst thing about it were all the haters who doomed there to never be an improved sequel, or Brandon Routh appearing in a JLA movie.
In fact, the death of SR probably killed JLA from ever showing up or showing up with 'real' superheroes instead of being padded with minors to make up for the lack of Supes and Batman...
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:36:04 PM
Batzarro: The World's Worst Detective! replied to Nicnac:
Wasn't the haters that killed Returns. It failed to attract casual folks. Because it was a competing with Pirates of the Caribean Sequel and X-3, had near to no action to compete with those, and the "It's a chick flick with Superman in it" just didn't with it's intended audience. Haters didn't stop the sequel happening(or Justice League, which I was for, and whichs canellation I resent, because now all we have going in DC Live Action is Green Lantern, JOnah Hex and Sgt Rock IIIIN SPAAACE!). The franchise painted itself into a corner with the Superson, with Lois going on with her relationship with James Marsden and the Superkid. You couldn't go on ignoring this issues and you can't go on with them either because they sucked. And then Siegel estate sued and crap got real.
Hey, arguing IS easier with the reply button!
Posted 11/13/2009 at 05:20:24 PM
klaatu said:
So we should support a BAD movie, so that we could get more sequels in the hopes of them being small improvements over the first one?
I tell you this: the way Superman Returns ended, with that stupid son of his and all.....if this movie did good on the box office, the sequel would be far far worse.
Singer had his chance, and blew it.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:40:45 PM
Friginator said:
Superman Returns wasn't great, but I didn't think it was too terrible. If the extra footage actually has stuff happening, and isn't just 15 more minutes"Superman flies around in the clouds as a deep rumbling shakes the ground" then it might be better.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:47:40 PM
khaine said:
There is a damn easy way to fix that movie - probably add some Singer stuff (he made the first 2 Xmen pretty damn good) and take out all the super-emo-stalker shit and make the kid Cyclops' kid and you would probably have an almost, mostly decent movie.
And at some point Sups needs to fight someone.
Also, no way the F4 movies were better. I so, SO SOOO wanted to like the 2nd one. But it was ass.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 04:59:50 PM
HBCat said:
I liked Superman Returns. I think the fanboy bitchin' did more to kill the sequals/franchise than anything. Viewed as a standalong movie, it was more than fine. I particularly liked the departure from the usual punch-up comic book movie style. It is hard to make a physicially invulnerable man vulnerable and IMHO Singer and Routh did that better than any of the previous movies (including the Donner classics). But the fans didn't want anything more than punch-ups. And we have to wait another 20 years before another director is brave enough to try again.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 05:09:10 PM
For one thing, it wasn't a standalone movie. It was a sequel to Superman II, and worse yet, a version of Superman II that maybe two people had seen at the time of release because the Donner Cut HADN'T BEEN RELEASED YET. So the superkid having powers made absolutely no sense to anyone watching who remembered Superman II. But, of course, since Singer was expressing his love for Donner and ignoring everything else, he didn't care.
Aside from the fact that Superman stalking Lois and the kid was creepy at best and a massive turnoff at worst, it's not that the fans wanted an action movie. They wanted a movie based on the Superman anyone under the age of 30 is familiar with - the John Byrne version, the one from Lois & Clark, the one from Smallville, the one from TAS. The one that isn't invulnerable to everything save Kryptonite, the one that can't fly faster than the speed of light, the one where Clark is the real personality and Superman's the disguise.
Singer didn't bother updating his source material, and as a result the movie (unsurprisingly) flopped. At least we'll have a good version of Superman preserved in animated form until WB gets their shit together.
You know what the sad thing was? JJ Abrams' notoriously horrible script (AKA the one where Krypton doesn't blow up) would've been better than Returns.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 05:47:50 PM
mythbri said:
Rob, I refuse to believe that you could like BOTH of the Fantastic Four movies better than Superman Returns. Sure, the movie wasn't great, and since Bryan Singer was working on it instead of X-3, that one sucked ass as well. But Fantastic Four? Really?
By the way, love the new format of the site. Shiny!
Posted 11/13/2009 at 05:48:47 PM
Geoff said:
And one other thing: anyone else in the world would think "Hey, Lex Luthor has five years free from prison, maybe he can build LexCorp, make the world think he's gone legit, and present Superman with an interesting bad guy as a result."
Nope, Singer's Lex decided to grow a really big rock.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 05:55:43 PM
Anonymous said:
So many Superman Returns haters! I actually thought that there were some great things about SR. The look of the film was breathtaking, and where the cast didn't simply look spot on, they in fact captured their character perfectly.
Also- Blaming Bryan Singer for SR (A Michael Dougherty script) is sort of like blaming Michael Bay for the turd that Roberto Orchi and Alex Kurtzman wrote for Transformers 2.
To me, this was the original movie's universe done right; using all of the tools of modern film-making and CGI technology.
-And you can't tell me you didn't get nerd-shivers when Sups brought down the plane in the baseball stadium.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 06:31:14 PM
Krutz replied to Anonymous:
I can tell you I got sick when it turns out Supes had a son via what was essentially date-rape. I felt cheated when they portrayed Lex Luthor as nothing but a two-bit con man out on another real estate scheme instead of a genius military industrialist running LexCorp.
And let's just talk about his "plan." He's going to make a continent that he plans on selling to the richest nations on Earth. This continent is made of kryptonite and rocks. According to the movie, it would generate whatever was near it, so why not some freaking oil? Or fertile soil? How are people supposed to live on a land made of nothing but rocks, some of them green? And what about the richest nations that would buy it from them? Well, according to his own master-plan map, he wiped out America and most of Europe, so I guess he plans on selling it to... Japan? They already have a island in the ocean, and they can grow stuff on it, thanks. And how were five people supposed to defend this continent, anyway? What's to stop people (say, refugees from America and Europe) from landing and kicking his ass?
Singer, as the director, should have said "no, and fuck no, this is dumb by any stretch of the imagination. Plots from 'The Superfriends' didn't have this many holes. Write it again and then kill yourself."
It was a very, very bad movie, unless you're just there for eye candy interrupted by buzzing noises made while the actors read their lines.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 09:38:43 PM
Mr Belding replied to Anonymous:
Nerd-shivers when Supes brought down the plane?
Dude I fucking wept like a bitch. My girlfriend actually felt the need to hug me.
I also cried at the opening credits...
and the Father becomes the Son speech at the end...
AND I DON'T CARE!
Posted 11/13/2009 at 09:43:29 PM
spazweez replied to Anonymous:
Well, you're right that blaming Singer for the script is like blaming Bay for Transformers 2's script -- in that they both actually ARE to blame.
It's not like directors (particularly big box office egomaniacs like Bay) just show up on the set and are handed a script to shoot. They can, and do, meddle with the story from the moment they're attached to a project. Some know when to sit back and let good writing work. Some collaborate well and can elevate mediocre writing. And some say "Give me more choppers to blow up."
Even if the director can't type "Fade In," he almost always has the power to say "This script is crap. Let's get someone else in to do another pass." Maybe if you're fresh out of film school or making your first leap from commercials you've got to shoot what you're handed, but not when you're Singer or Bay. Those guys really have no excuse for shooting junk.
Posted 11/15/2009 at 07:17:58 PM
Kerri said:
I didn't even have to watch the video to know I would lose brain cells during the process.
All I really remember of that movie (I think because I've erased it from my memory) was my friend making fun of a scene while doing an impression of Lois Lane. (in this scenario, whiny) I responded to this with my own comment, "Superman, I'm bored as fuck."
We stopped watching after that point.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 06:34:22 PM
Mr Belding said:
Funny how the only people who get replies to comments are the folks who liked the movie. When did society degenerate into a bunch of whining babies who feel the endless need to complain about things? Oh right... internet.
Can't wait till I get a girlfriend and move out of my mom's so I can sneer at you people.
And yes I LOVED Superman Returns. It was a love letter to the original Superman. When did that become a bad thing?
Posted 11/13/2009 at 06:46:41 PM
Phanboy (heh) replied to Mr Belding:
I've seen love letters from stalkers to Sandra Bullock (my own mostly...) that were less creepy than Super-absent-father-with-hyper-peeping-tom-powers. Additionally they're all a shit-ton more coherent then Superman lifting a $&%(@*$ kryptonite mountain.
Just because something is a love letter doesn't mean its not a poorly written piece of crap.
At least thats what Sandra's agent told me.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 07:14:33 PM
Monkey replied to Mr Belding:
It became a bad thing when the movie ended up being terrible.
Sure I and II were fine for their time, but they are both horribly dated. Not saying people can't enjoy the originals all the same but still, horribly dated. Not everything holds up to the test of time. And really, they were not meant to be timeless classics nor are they.
The reason that this movie bombed is the theaters full of happy adult people, living in the present, who don't even realise that this movie is set between two other movies that came out like 30 years ago. They all hated it.
Sure, there were the "true fans" who cling to every single part of their childhood and wax poetic about reliving happier days before the "lost their innocence" and blah blah blah. Nobody cares what those guys think. They are like .01% of the market.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 09:46:16 PM
Mr Belding replied to Monkey:
I am no fan. I know bugger all about Superman outside of the film franchise and never want to learn. I also hate "true fans" because they are whatever they want to be.
What I cannot stand is people who must go on and on and on about a film because they didn't like it even YEARS after it has passed. Does anybody else realise how pathetic it is to complain about Jar Jar Binks, nuking refrigerators or kryptonite landmasses?
But I liked Star Wars, Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and Superman Returns. Why? Because I am not a nerd anymore.
Why can't people let it go?
Posted 11/14/2009 at 10:05:41 AM
Conspiracy Girl said:
I think the best review of Superman Returns that I saw was when I was at the theatre watching it, and someone down the aisle from me spent most of the movie asleep. I could hearing his snoring over the movie!
Also, Kate Bosworth is slightly younger than I am, so I figured out that in order for her to have had a 5 year old child, she would have had to have won her Pulitzer and been a world-renowned reporter before she was 18- heck of an alternative to high school! Guess I'm a slacker.
Posted 11/13/2009 at 10:20:20 PM
demoncat said:
this just proves that some fans actully liked super man returns enough to want to have the directors cut but to want it that bad to have to take out a pettion for it when it did what batman and robin did to the bat franchise . warner brothers proably does not want to be reminded of their screw up with their number one character. which means unless they do a super movie set super man returns the directors cut not going to happen
Posted 11/14/2009 at 12:46:31 AM
Bob said:
I agree on both sides of this discussion.
The part with the plane was effing incredible, the subplot with the kid killed the movie.
It was a direct sequel to the early movies, and that vision should end now.
Having said that- I signed the petition- why not? I never understand why people want to limit what is out there.
And Superman 3 is good- The fight in the Junkyard rules. When he pulls open his shirt to reveal the crisp bright blue red and yellow, you gotta love it.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 01:07:06 AM
Aberrant said:
You all have to learn to look on the bright side of things. Brian singer's portrayal of Superman as a dead beat "baby's daddy" did save us from whatever the hell that crap was that Brett Ratner was gonna give us with Nicholas Cage as Superman. I'll take it as a lesser of two evils winfall.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 01:10:26 AM
Nikademus said:
I really REALLY liked the first half of Superman Returns. The credits alone were amazing. When he first returns to the Daily Planet was borderline perfect, IMO. The part where he saves the plane, I will not lie, it still gets to me even now. But. Everything from the point where Luthor made that island onward was resoundingly meh. It's like they got half way thru and decided to just cruise thru the rest of it cuz they had to make a deadline or something.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 01:33:53 AM
Stanley Ipkis said:
Well, you can say what you want about the movie, but there was so many scenes in that movie that was basically a wet dream for me just to see a real life Superman do. Because the FX was brilliant. And lets face it, I didn't believe a man could fly after the Reeves movies. But with todays FX it looked pretty fucking bad ass!!!!
Posted 11/14/2009 at 02:32:03 AM
The Mysterious Stranger said:
What, are they serious? What are their motivations? Do they want to see that Christopher Reeve clone in a Kryptonian uniform that badly? Or maybe they want to see some heartwarming scenes where Supes spend time with his bastard child. You know, have the "birds and the freaky superpowers" conversation...
Maybe pay child support, just sayin'...
On a sidenote, Clark Kent returned to The Daily Planet the same time Supes returned to Earth... Wake the Skywalking up, you morons. Oh, I forgot, "magic glasses" never mind.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 03:45:54 AM
Asat said:
What we need to shut off all the whining is a return to Superman's ROOTS, like "Batman Begins". Batman stated out as a crazy-ass vigilante and folks loved seeing that dark side return.
Well guess what? Superman started out as a bad-ass too. Chris Reeve did nice-guy Superman better than anyone can do it today, so stop going that direction. Sign up Gerard Butler and film "Reign of the Superman".
At least it won't suck.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 06:07:10 AM
Hibiscus said:
Superman Returns has a 76% on Rotten Tomatoes, meaning that of people paid to watch and analyze movies for living, 76% of them thought it was a decent flick. If it was as bad as you make it out to be, don't you think that percentage would be a lot lower? For example, Transformers 2 has a 19%. Fantastic Four has a 26%.
My point with all of this isn't to defend Superman Returns (which disappointed me as a Superman movie) so much as question the nerd orthodoxy that it's indisputably awful. That isn't a sensible opinion.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 08:02:32 AM
klaatu81 said:
It seems people always remember "the scene with the plane". Yes, it was the best part of the movie and that´s saying something isn´t it?
We waited 20 years for a movie where the best part of it is supes rescuing a plane. Well done, Bryan Singer.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 09:50:07 AM
Glass said:
The thing that killed Superman Returns was a painful lack of action. The only real action scene (the airplane rescue) was the best part of the movie and it took place in the first 10 minutes.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 11:02:19 AM
Kenton said:
This was the worst comic book movie I've ever seen.
Superman is Jesus!
Superman needs a prop plane to rescue him!
Superman can't act, so he doesn't have any dialogue!
Anything we can't figure out, we'll steal from Richard Donner, John Williams, and Christopher Reeve!
Total piece of garbage...
Posted 11/14/2009 at 01:21:42 PM
Carl said:
I enjoyed Superman Returns. I believe that people that have a demented loathing for this movie probably have some sort of dementia, you know, like the "Saw" franchise fan base. If you don't like the movie, fuck off and let the people that liked it alone instead of parading how "wrong" about the movie we are. All I have to say about the worst comic movie of all time involves the words "Spider-Man" and "3". And just remember, you almost got Tim Burton and fucking Nick Cage as leather-boy from Planet Emo-Kryton...
Posted 11/14/2009 at 02:07:59 PM
Nikademus said:
I think if Singer were allowed to make a second Superman movie we might be pleasantly surprised. When the first X-Men movie came out one of the complaints about it was that it was kinda slow paced, ya know not enough action (sound familiar?). Then he did X-2, berzerker rage and all.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 04:28:48 PM
mhymners said:
It was SUCH A BAD MOVIE!!! there is no argument, so shut up. His suit wasn't even the right frickin colour.
Posted 11/14/2009 at 04:37:19 PM
Carl said:
If it came down to watching Superman Returns and saving any one of the whiny lil'bitches that hate this movie, my gosh, it was nice not knowing you weak, weak nancy sisters...
Posted 11/14/2009 at 11:00:47 PM
Monte said:
I think it's ironic that the same people who criticize Superman Returns because Superman lifted a kryptonite mountain are often the same ones who say they'd anticipated "the first good Superman movie in twenty years," when in the original Superman he flew fast enough around the planet to turn back time.
My only criticism of Superman Returns is that it was too fawningly loyal to the original film and its sequel; I always found those movies overrated, even when I was a kid.
I'd have preferred a more menacing approach to Lex Luthor, but that was a direct consequence of the decision to pay tribute to the original movies, and most nerds celebrated Singer's decision to do so ahead of time because nerds are frail creatures who cannot accept that they're not nine years old anymore.
I am baffled at how upset people are that Superman has a kid and that he's not living with said kid. It was a daring direction in which to take the franchise, and I'd have liked to've seen what Singer would have done with it.
Ultimately, I concur with the suggestion above that a Singer sequel would have satisfied many of the people who felt disappointed by the original. Now we'll never know, of course.
In the meantime, at least we have Superman Returns.
I for one appreciate it.
Posted 11/15/2009 at 03:57:25 AM
Chad said:
I loved the movie.
I think you people just don't get what movies are for. It seems like you've forgotten the roots of the great B movies of the 50's. It the same complaints about Star Wars Episodes I - III. They were awesome if viewed with the right perspective.
Get over it and just enjoy...stop being divas.
I guess that's the difference between nerds and geeks.
Posted 11/16/2009 at 08:09:17 AM
gatchamandave said:
The great B movies of the 1950s weren't made for a price that could finance the economy of a small African nation for the next ten years.
I guess THAT'S the difference between nerds, geeks and people who live in the real world.
Posted 11/16/2009 at 09:29:49 AM
nerdvirgins said:
people who have such strong hate for superman returns are nerds and virgins. like the hate for ang lee's hulk. you guys prefer superman flying around bashing things with his fist. try to make the character too much of an adult and you rebel like the nerds who shake around actual real life girls. face it, the only thing shitty about superman returns was kevin spacey and his shitty kryptonite land scheme. the rest rocked and was probably the most adult superhero movie of all time, which was singer's intention. go back to nerd virgin stuff, nerd virgins.
Posted 11/16/2009 at 12:26:47 PM
Loafy said:
It isn't the Superman movie I wanted, (I wanted a complete reboot) but Superman Returns is a beautiful love letter to the Donner films. It has the same feel as the originals whiel making it more realistic and less hokey, and I'm not just talking about the SFX. For what it is, I think it's a pretty darn good film. Unfortunately, it was a mistake to not reboot it for a new generation.
Posted 11/16/2009 at 02:43:03 PM
Yakko said:
I don't mind the premise of "big, dumb action movie - shut up and just watch it", but if this flick was such a love letter to Donner as everyone claims, why did they eviscerate Lois so badly as a character? She as strong and witty in the original movies; in Returns, she's scenery.
And I know Kevin Smith has covered this already but i can't resist. If Lois doesn't know who Supes is, why isn't she pissed off at him for impregnating her when she doesn't remember it happening?
Also, Superman does not throw a single punch in this movie. He's not the Hulk, but he's not Ghandi either.
Posted 11/17/2009 at 12:08:29 AM
Double R said:
I, for one, really liked Superman Returns. I wouldn't mind a director's cut (and maybe it will make it even better, like the much-improved Daredevil Director's Cut)
1. Superman: The Movie
2. Superman II: Richard Donner Cut
3. Superman Returns
4. Superman II: Original Version
5. Superman III
6. Superman IV
but that's just my opinion.
Posted 11/17/2009 at 04:45:32 PM
HBCat said:
What's with the urge to call for a 'reboot' for every sequal/ related movie ever made?? What's wrong with sequals? Granted batman begins and star trek were great but saying superman returns sucked coz it wasn't a reboot is just plain stupid.
Posted 11/21/2009 at 04:39:42 PM






