• Uh, no they don't.  You're thinking of slash writers.  This one, with a male "protagonist" clearly serving as author avatar while slutty females from multiple continuities service him slavishly, was almost certainly written by a boy.

• I think he thought it up while imagining what it would be like to still have balls, after his significent other discovered all these fics. Ridicule time- exposing his now not erect lambda shuttle-sized penis to her horrified eyes and the bouder-sized balls didn't help Nope, it's not exactly Comicsnix standard of literary shat.

• God this made my brain hurt. Grammar angel, attack!

• they tend to be girls, actually.

• I actually laughed a little while reading this, mostly due to the fact I COULDN'T read it because I got lost in the endless sea of bad English. While the crossover makes no sense, it's far less disturbing than the Optimus Prime fanfic (which will forever haunt me due to the endless reaches to which the author threw in her personal life, right down to her real child).

• roflsnort. Don't you dare to send out the plot bunnies. People might read that. Ebil people.

• I heard that, Scipio!

• I'm glad for Rob's comments, because I would have had no idea what was going on in that story. On second thought, that might be for the best.

• You both are aware that we've already done this, right?

• The PINK ZONE is for unloading only.

• THAT. WAS. AWESOME. The hilariously bad ones are always my favorites. Then again, my introduction to fanfic was My Immortal, followed quickly by Christian Humber Reloaded. :P

• I honestly have no idea what happened in this story. There's a slimy blue girl, Naruto let out the Kyuubi (who has testicles often referred to as various landmarks), and that's about all I caught. This one will bug me only because of the depressing sentence structure and grammar.

• You`re the author of this absolute trainwreck, aren`t you? How can you even work a computer with grammar that atrocious?

• Terribly Dark and Unusual... not half bad says I...

• ...that was odd. I hate crossovers. It goes against...humanity (I would say the internet...but nothing goes against the internet). It was odd, not disturbing. However I do feel as part of my soul has been raped since Star Wars was defined in this manner. Someone should write a Smurfette / Hagrid one, that would be disturbing.

• Thanks for these bad grammar FFF. I much prefer these with your commentary than the horrifying, nightmare inducing ones. "FYI, I thought that Jaine Proudmore might be another EU character, but it turns out she's from World of Warcraft. So presumably she's more used to walking into semen-coated rooms to find various women pleasuring a giant fox." That's not until Cataclysm, the next WoW expansion with the addition of the Worgen playable race.

• Yes. This, this is what hooked me into Fan Fiction Friday. But please don't condemn the utterly deplorable all together. FFF just wouldn't be the same without Deathbound, Day of Reckoning, Carebears and Pokemon under its belt.

• By Belphegor's scrotum! THIS.CREATURE.MUST.BE.STOPPED! =O

• According to Urban Dictionary, 'pink zone' is the vaginal area... so... this giant fox Naruto has not only a mountainous penis and boulder balls, but a vagina as well.

• I dare you to design a rubric with criteria and scores specifically for FFF . . . I triple dog dare ya!

• I'm glad we only received chapter 4. It's so difficult to read that this would have been the only FFF I opted not to read had it been posted in it's entirety. People that write like that infuriate me.

• This was perfect. I was lost from the 1st line and then it got worse. I read the begining a few times to see if i had somehow missed an explaination about the whole size thing. (Seriously, so is the spaceship sized "pink zone" on a normal sized naruto?) then, to my delight, people get added to the story that make it make even nuttier. This is a masterpiece of smut and crazy. Bravo. if a porn writing monkey was given acid you might be able to get close to the perfection that is this pile of gibberish

• Rob, please, for the love of god, don't tame these down. Yeah, weird is good and all, and quirky mashups can be hilarious, but the true value of FFF is in trying to shatter sanity. Sure, the other story didn't cause anyone's heads to explode in gory shards of brainpan, but that's only because you've done such a fine job of desensitizing us. Take the challenge, man. Keep trying to kill us with mind-shattering wrongness. It's a core value of the internet, and I have to admit, sometimes you succeed brilliantly. I still have nightmares about Cyclops bursting into my room and throwing worms at me.

• Yay! FFF is still here! Thank you Rob! I can't wait for more gibbering cock-monsters raping the students of Hogwarts.

• Rob, your snarky commentary is always the best part. Also from now on when I see Kyuubi, I'll have this mental picture of him all sprawled out with his giant furry nads exposed. Oh the wrongness...

• The only thing that made the Other Story not entertaining was a lack of silly commentary & pictures. We readers need these to balance out the shittiness of the story. You, Rob, get that connection to your readers through commentary, otherwise it just seems distant, vague, confusing and sickening. You know, like most adult fan fiction on other websites.

• See, this is how you do it Rob. I laughed SO hard at: "Second, try and diagram that sentence, I fucking dare you." Then you got me again with your reference to "The Office". :) Keep it up! Now, for my comment on this particular FFF... uhh... did the guy skip straight from 1st grade to 10th grade when it comes to even the most basic sentence structure rules? Damn. WAY too many parentheses and not nearly enough punctuation... ouch...

• You know... I actually laughed at FFF again. I did understand a word of the actual fic, but the more Bricken, the better, as far as I'm concerned. Carry on, good man.

• Mwahahaha. Pink zone... I too enjoy the soul-scarringly terrible fics in moderation with the laughable ones (like the above). Of course the Lucius/Draco skullfuck episode...and the Lara Croft fiasco/crapfest... but still. Oh, and let's not forget the Pokemon Story. I have to go wash my eyes now. (Points for you if you get the Office reference. -_^)

• aaah, it's good to see you returning to your original FFF roots, rob, instead of this "imma shock you big time, fuckers!" kind of person you're turning into, lately. also... -sings- On top of Naruto All covered with cum How she so slimy God please kill me now no wait, you know what? i'll do it myself, thank you. -pulls out gun- -blow own brains out-

• Hooray for the return of FanFiction Friday! I was worried after last week that it might be gone for a while. An extra big hooray for the return of the snarky comments, because they really add to our "enjoyment". <i>He was not at all surprised when he saw the girl lick her lips when she saw the blue skinned size 40 Twi Lek woman</i> This gives me a rather odd mental image, because where I'm from, a skinny woman is size 6, a conventionally-attractive woman is size 12, an average woman is size 16, a voluptuous woman is size 24, and the biggest size in plus size clothing shops is a size 36. Of course, it could be that Mr Godzilla has fat fetishism going on as well as all his other, er, issues, but I wonder what size he actually meant? <i>starting to climb up his furry side</i> Does he have a furry side and a non-furry side? <i>This got the desired results as her "mountain"</i> [...] <i>many delightful showers and drinks.</i> We should have a competition. Longest run-on sentence in a bad fanfic ever! Only rule: it must have been published in advance of the competition (no writing a badfic to order). <i>On top of Naruto All covered with cum How she so slimy God please kill me now</i> The version of this song I know is: On top of spaghetti All covered with cheese I lost my poor meatball When somebody sneezed I am now especially traumatised, because I learnt that song in Brownies when I was 9. Don't think I need to point out why "sneeze" is sometimes a badfic reference for male orgasm, do I? <i>She had to her pleasant surprise what became of the Jedi whom like the rest of the imperials always assumed was a slut was now being dominated by ' is that crimson?' she thought in awe as her apparently dominating and darkly beautiful role model was obviously the one in charge of this event.</i> WHAT? Also, the Cryptophallid reference damn near killed me :)

• COMMAS. PLEASE.

• I'm game for less poorly written sex and more weirdness in general. We need more stuff like that DBZ/Anne Frank crossover. And yes, I never thought I'd ever type that sentence.

• I'm glad you saw what made FFF so entertaining, that it was to make fun of incredibly messed up fan fiction (and, of course, those who write them), not make a game of one-upmanship to find the worst and most disturbing fan fiction

• Ah, back to the good old days of FFF. When it wasn't about out-grossing each other but about making each other laugh. I'm glad Rob didn't decide to stop FFF altogether, I think we all learn something new each week. Like that Robocob CAN literally blow smoke up Batman's ass. I'm glad you're back to your prime, Rob. I look forward to many fanfics to come.

• Mt... Naruto... Hood... Excuse me while I go dry heave.

• The first FFF I have ever stopped reading half way through. And why? Not because of the content. No, instead, I stopped reading it because the grammar was so bad, I couldn't understand what I was reading, even after REREADING it 5 times. So congrats Rob, you've finally managed to get to me.

• Tell you what, Rob. If you find a fic, don't hype it as better or worse than The Pokemon Story. Simply post it, with a warning label on how bad it is. If people don't want to be repulsed, they won't read it. Simple as that.

• Does it say something very scary about me that I completely lost interest in the story at "Diagram that sentence. I fucking dare you" ? Dare taken. I LOVED diagramming sentences when I was a kid. And I got a lot of free time before my graveyard shift today.

• if that was suppose to be chapter four hate to dare wonder what the first three chapters are like though no doubt explains how aura got covered in Narotes demon mucus plus other things he no doubt did to her to break her and make her submit not only to willing commit beastality but a three way with the crimson and a world of warcraft character. who is a sex fiend. and since this is Robs site he can post what ever type of fan fic friday he chooses though nothing will purge the evil of the pokemon story.

• ...broken and sobbing mucus covered Jedi...

• Hey, last weeks was pretty fucked up. But Ive read Arsenic Lullaby and my favorite parts involved the army of aborted fetuses.

• The internet needs to remember that My Immortal is a travesty not something to aspire to.

• "At best, she's just kind of 'Assistant to the Regional Manager.'" You mean Assistant Regional Manager. :P

• BELIEVE IT!

• The grammar...the grammar!

• This weeks FFF was as great as Lambda-class spaceships. when I read it I was as aroused as a Lambda-class spaceship. I swear my erection was the same size, shape, and weight of a Lambda-class spaceship. Lambda-class spaceships!!

• Thanks for the kind words, everybody. Since every bad thing someone comments about me on TR makes me cry, it's always much appreciated.

• This is horrifying to me. I have to read this type of grammar all the time for work, but at least the students are attempting to use it for academic discourse (incomprehensible as their analysis may be). This, however, is in service to a bizarrely esoteric series of sexual fetishes. Reading things like this will be my punishment when I'm inevitably sent to Hell. WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SAYING!? HOW THE FUCK CAN I GRADE THIS!? FUCK!!

• Rob, you are on form as usual. Your sharp wit during such horrible writing, be it content or style, helps me get through the crazy work week. May you never stop condeming awful fan fiction to mockery.

• Praise be! From now on it's funny fanfics all the way! It's way more fun reading these than the really disgusting ones.

• read moar yiff, you'll figure it out

• See my comment above.

• Wow, I didn't think it was possible. That song actually sounds crappier in real life than what I was imagining in my head.

• Am I the only one who thinks this is Chapter 4 in the same way that Star Wars was Episode 4?

• Butchering English is a terrible, terrible crime.

• Mt. Naruto hood!! Awesome!

• excellent comments Rob... I nearly LOLed at work... two or three times...

• PJ pointed out what I loser I am that my first comment was "Well clearly this guy doesn't understand Jaina Proudmoore at all. PJ, she is the child of admiral Proudmoore, not an admiral herself, alas." Might be more of a sign that that was the only part of this I got in the least. The english language needs to call the cops and get to an ER fast, so they can run a kit, while the evidence is still fresh.

• This, times a million.

• ya -3- story was A+ but grammer made my eyes cry

• Hooray for giant-fox-cock bukkake! Also, count me among those who will be sad if we don't get a brain-breaker at least every couple of months.

• Great stuff Rob! I have no idea who did what to who, or why 3 different genres randomly crossed, and if I DID know who was doing what to who, I wouldnt know WHERE they were doing it because I don't know what the FUCK a pink zone is. Is that like the danger zone? The end zone? What? This was a spectacularly confusing FFF. Gratz.

• The same as me If rob removes the mind shattering ones I`ll be devastated :(

• If someone could provide pictures of the other characters involved, perhaps I would be slightly less confused. Maybe not, though. That grammar was beyond atrocious.

• I approve of this week's FFF.

• I'd comment on this, but I didn't understand any of it. Does that mean I'm sane?

• Tell me Godzilla didn't just screw with "Voices". TELL ME THAT DIDN'T JUST HAPPEN. This is the song he's referring to at the end, in case you're wondering: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R2cs3FA6Z_M

• I'll be honest, I haven't gotten around to The Other Story yet, but my cohorts in FFF-judging have assured me that it is horrifying--though not in their opinion as bad as Pokemon. It's the comparison, I think, that people have focused on more than The Other Story itself. If you want to switch exclusively to hilariously weird over terribly mind-scarring, that's obviously your call. It's your damn site, after all. But I don't think the kneejerk macho "Haha that didn't scar me at all!" reactions are due to The Other Story not being horrifying, but simply because claiming that something is THE WORST EVER is a very bold claim, and people will instinctively try to refute it. I believe you when you say it's the worst, most terrible FFF you've ever read. It might be that way for me, too. But reading and rating FFFs has taught me that the mind-scarring scale of Fantastically Fucked-up Fiction varies for each individual (though patterns tend to emerge and certain FFFs float to the top of the hellish cesspool). Everyone's 'Top Pick' tends to differ especially, as an individual's unique experiences and background predispose them to being especially horrified by certain things in particular. I guess I'm just trying to say don't blame yourself, and don't be down on the whole 'Here are some terrible FFFs that will break your soul' concept. You rule at it, I assure you. Just don't tease your depraved followers with something that allegedly tops the list. Opinions will differ, and nerds are, if anything, intensely vocal about their obsessions (and you are all obsessed about FFF, don't you dare lie). Okay, I'm done, and I'm sorry if any of that offended. It's not meant to. I enjoy both types of FFFs, though I'll indeed be a little disheartened if you eliminate the mind-shattering ones from the mix. I wouldn't, however, blame you in the slightest. :) Holy crap, I just defended/supported sickeningly bad FFF. What is <i>wrong</i> with me?!

• Yes, please post the weirdest or funniest bad fan fiction out there, not the most depraved. I want to laugh at these people, not be horrified by them.

• I have a feeling this was an adaptation. The tiny litle people were his fingers and he was pretending to be a large fox demon thing. I think he thought this up while playing with his balls.

• So, what is actually happening here? The grammar and sentence structure was so odd that I couldn't follow it at all. I think this may actually be worse than last week's.

• Someone's going to read this, and with the specific measurements of Demon Fox Naruto's penis (by way of a Star Wars Ship Manual giving exact measurments), some poor idiot will think "that'd be the equivalent of ants crawling on my penis!" Next thing you know some kids gonna stick his dick in an ant bed. Pink zone...I'm thinking the author is refering to the general genital area. But don't hold me to that. PLEASE!

• What the fuck? That was confusing as hell. Funny, though.

• This is how FFF should be... Kudos Rob... You have, in a way, topped last week. You picked an odd story, and made it funny with your sarcastic comments. That's what everyone wants.....

• I didn't understand half of what was "happening" due to the strangely and oddly (long and unnecessary) formed sentences that I, even in emulation, cannot do justice to.

• Honestly, I think you should try to find more stories like the Batman/Robocop slash fic. That stuff is hilarious!

• So Naruto is a fox with a gigantic penis and..........yep, you've lost me. I do enjoy the phrase "pink zone" however.

• I seriously tried to read this, because you know, I'm bored and at work. I've tried to skim a couple of these before, again I am bored and at work, but what the hell? Who writes this shit? Are they all 13 year old boys with only vague notions of sex and grammar? Not like I can write a sentence without it being a run-on myself. Or use proper grammar. But fuck, I can't follow who is narrating even. Man, if I ever catch my boys writing up shit like this, I'm going to beat them. Then kill my my ex (their mother) because it is obviously her that failed as a parent.

• I find this more horrifying than last week- as I could barely get through it due to the grammar-- and I had no clue what the hell was going on-- this one might need pictures to explain it to me. (other than the basic 3 women climbing a Lamda Class size (which holds a minimum of 20 troops) dick that shoots green acidic sperm lasers like a TIE Fighter.)

• Well, if this brings us another fanfiction equal to the giant squid & Hogwarts story then I'm fine with this. Fanfiction never manages to scar me, but it usually delights me. Also, I definitely need to use "assistant to the regional manager" in a sentence some time next week.

• Ripper reference FTW

• I don't think most of the people really read the other story. Its really only truly horrifying if you think about it too much.

• these writers... lemme tell you something about dese writers... dese guys, are un-FUCKING-believable...

• Well done. Bizarre crossover, terrible grammar and spelling, bad smut, complete and utter confusion, and a crappy song. However, please remember to post some terrible fanfics. I forgot to post this last week, but I enjoy the balance of soul-scarring and hilariously bad fanfics.

• That was much harder to read than last week - not the content, mind you, just the English.

TotalComments: 86