I Find Your Lack of Pancakes... Disturbing

By Rob Bricken in Merchandise, Movies
Monday, May 24, 2010 at 12:00 pm
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Williams-Sonoma is offering the above Star Wars-shaped pancake molds for not insubstantial $20 (you get all three). But what's freaking me out is the accompanying sales text:
A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, a Jedi Kitchen Master created an epic breakfast to unleash the power of his Jedi Padawan. Using the Force™, he created three nonstick steel pancake molds in honor of his favorite galactic heroes and villains: Yoda™, Darth Vader™ and a stormtrooper™. Our Star Wars molds couldn't be easier to use. Just place them with their handles up on a preheated griddle then pour in your batter. After the first side has set, remove the molds and flip the pancakes. Serve a stack drenched in your favorite syrup - and let the adventures begin.
I... I don't even know what to say. "A Jedi Kitchen Master"? "Unleash the power of his Jedi Padawan"? "Let the adventures begin"? Shudder. I swear to god this is an FFF waiting to happen, and it ends with a Jedi sticking his dick in a syrup-covered short stack and fucking the hell out of some pancakes. You know, the older I get, the more I think the Sith were on to something. (Via Nerd Bastards)

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