Eh, House of the Dead was a freaking aweome flick. It, of course, was a horrible piece of shit - but it was the best So Bad It;s Good movie I've seen in a long time,
I don't know how or why it took so long for Uwe Boll to jump on the zombie gravy train, but he's certainly on it now -- here's a trailer for his newest flick, Zombie Massacre. I don't want to rock your world, but it might not be a cinematic masterpiece, possibly partially because Boll seems to have a very all-inclusive interpretation of "zombies" (and you can see in the video's still above). These guys look more like monsters than the undead, and the only make-up and prosthetics they seem to have are located on their heads. Really, it would still be pretty benign except for the lady wielding the samurai sword. DAMMIT, BOLL, YOU'RE MAKING MICHONNE LOOK BAD. NOT COOL, DUDE.
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Am I the only one that noticed the one guy had a shield with a star painted on it? Is there any franchise Boll won't blatantly steal from?
It probably took him so long to hop on the zombie train because he lives in the same province as Romero...so I'll put money on he heard what Boll was thinking and locked him in his basement...clearly Boll wasn't tied up tightly enough.
Did...did I see a rat-monkey in there? Are these mother fuckers using rat-monkeys?ALERT PETER JACKSON AT ONCE!!!
I couldn't help but notice that the zombies are spraying blood all over; when one gets his arm chopped off, he even spurts a long stream. Doesn't arterial spray require a beating heart?
Yes, I'm trying to apply logic to a Uwe Boll movie. I hope that's my nadir for the day.
I was almost going to ask a question before I realised the only answer one could give would be "Uwe Boll."
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Eeew Boll is a hate crime on entertainment.
Enjoyment and Happiness murdered eew bolls family, now he's taking revenge by destroying them wherever he sees them.
Eeew Boll is to talent what myvoice is to commenting.
WTF is wrong with this "commenting" system anyway!?! It is buggy as sin and a complete nuisance. Do you hate page views? Do you want to banish all but the most exploitable rubes like gawker did? This is seriously bad, I hope ya'll saved a ton of money by using a system that was clearly programed by a bunch of brain-damaged lemurs. I really tried to keep my thoughts on this to myself and hopefully now i've written 'em out I'll be able to return to suffering silently, but somebody on your end needs to crack down 'cuz you're getting hosed by this scam artist "service."
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@Trshstr To all: I've started a Facebook post over at The TR Irregulars group where people can air their concerns/grievances about LiveFyre. I'm trying to make a real, functional list of all the problems people have, so the more specifics the better.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/192200530902902/permalink/248536005269354/
@Topless Robot I effing <3 you Rob. Imma sprinkle love when I see hate...if only for breif moments of joy..
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@Trshstr shittiest comment system ever - I've seen "in house" comment systems that somebody cut-pasted together that were better than this piece of crap. Heck the '80s BBS system comment systems were better than this. From what I've been able to tell "My Voice Nation" is a wannabe social site that failed and so now offers to host its comment system to other sites.
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@Gallen_Dugall @Trshstr Oh, that I was unaware of. That just heaps on another pile of anger towards this system.
guess uwe got tired of doing video game movies so now he has set his sights on adding zombies to his list of taking a liked thing and turning them into mud
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The moment that leads up to 1:14 in the video
Soldier: "Okay the Zombies are surrounding this warehouse and we're low on ammo. And it sounds like they're just seconds away from bashing the door in and ripping us to shreds. Most likely we're not going to make it out alive." Guy with beard: "Okay, just give me a minute to paint a Captain America star on this garbage can cover, and I'll be right with you."
He didn't direct this sub-fanfilm shit pile, but, it has the hallmarks of his handiwork all the same. Looks like he's producing tripe for a whole new equally inept generation of talentless hacks. We're fucked.
@GarethPrime So he didn't direct it, but it was branded as a Uwe Boll production, because that would make people want to see it. And he has a brand.
Michael Bay must be behind this, somehow. Damn you, Michael Bay!!!
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Didn't he make a Zombie movie before? a SEGA Zombie Movie? It even featured clips form the game that the movie was based on flashing across the screen at random intervals.
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@SumEllisOck Oh yeah House of the Dead I saw that on TV one day. It wasn't bad for a made for TV movie... except it wasn't.
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@10glfan59 Michael Bay? Boll, for all his terrible work, doesn't destroy one's childhood.
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Boll vs. Bay
I really have no idea who I hate more. Boll killed BloodRayne and Bay killed Transformers.....
Nope it is still Bay how to you kill a movie about giant freaking robots? How?
