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How the hell is Resident Evil and the jackass idea of adding 3D on the -good- side of the list? Screw that Hollywood cheap gimmick.
5. Go back to what worked (Halloween 4, Fast and Furious).
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Sometimes, franchise producers get really stupid, and decide that what was appealing about their original property was neither the story nor the characters, but the general concept. Often, this is also them attempting to prove a point about stars being replaceable. So when Halloween stopped being about Michael Myers in the third movie, and the Fast/Furious series suddenly went to Japan and forgot about Paul Walker completely, the ensuing movies - whatever their merits - started with strikes against them because they weren't the continuations fans had hoped for. But the studios wised up, and both part-fours saw the return of the favorite characters and formulas. "Dinosaurs in a broken theme park on an island" is a simple enough template to not screw up, one would think.
4. Whatever the fuck they did in The Land Before Time IV (The Land Before Time IV).
"You are tearrring me APAARRRRT Dino-Lisa!"
I'm not watching to find out. But something's working for them, because there are thirteen movies in the series. Were you aware of this? That's more than Jason Voorhees has, even if you include the remake and Freddy vs. Jason.
3. The Stallone Rule of Four: skip directly to the good parts, and amp them up (Rocky IV, Rambo).
The first Rocky and Rambo films were serious movies about outsiders struggling to fit in and find their place in the world, but by the time Sylvester Stallone's alter-egos were single-handedly fighting Soviets in Afghanistan, or staring down Hulk Hogan and Mr. T, they had become cartoons. So Rocky IV gives us a robot, a Soviet steroid machine and a gratuitous death, along with some classic '80s driving-and-crying montages. Rambo is basically an excuse to have evil Asians explode into bloody showers of guts. The point Spielberg can take away here is that we don't need a lengthy set-up to get people onto the dinosaur island. Start right there, and have the first person get eaten immediately.
2. If you can't think of anything else, add 3-D (Resident Evil: Afterlife, Underworld: Evolution).
When nobody cares about your plot, but is just coming to see a tightly clad female warrior (played by your wife) kicking the crap out of monsters, the only way to really change it up is to give them a tightly clad female warrior (played by your wife) kicking the crap out of monsters...in 3D!!! Best big-budget honeymoon videos ever. JP4 will indeed be in 3D, but Kate Capshaw may not be in ass-kicking shape these days.
1. Figure out what part of your audience hasn't been served yet, and give them what they want (Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home, A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master).
While most Trekkers love the ideas of science fiction and the action-adventure elements of the old show, there has always been a non-insignificant section of fandom that looks forward to space hippies, Spock losing his brain, and Shatner going crazy with the hand gestures and overacting. Such fans had to grab individual moments where they could in the first three movies ("KHAAAAAAAN!") but it wasn't until the fourth that the lighter side of Starfleet got an entire nuclear-wessel-powered movie, and Spock learned how to swear. Likewise, in taking over the Freddy Krueger franchise, Renny Harlin realized that the audience was rooting more for Freddy than his victims, and played to that, making Freddy a callous, carefree quipper in the best Bond/Schwarzenegger tradition.
Has any part of the Jurassic Park audience not been served yet? It would seem to me that only a true-to-the-first-book reboot would accomplish that feat, as only book loyalists were vocally disappointed by the first film. Perhaps the other great achievement of Nightmare 4 and Trek IV should be observed more: they don't take themselves too seriously.
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Sometimes, franchise producers get really stupid, and decide that what was appealing about their original property was neither the story nor the characters, but the general concept. Often, this is also them attempting to prove a point about stars being replaceable. So when Halloween stopped being about Michael Myers in the third movie
See the thing is, Halloween was never suppose to be a franchise about was not supposed to be an unstoppable killer slashing his way through the nubile virgins of Haddonfield. It was suppose to be a anthology series with different Halloween themed horror movie, kind of akin to 2010's Trick-R-Treat. It was brilliant idea - just think of all the different stories that you could do on Halloween night? Fairy tales, modern ghost stories, suspense, true horror stories - the possibilities are endless.
But the movie flopped at the box office, savaged by reviewers and was critically drubbed by fans - which is a damn shame. While the original Halloween is hands down the best of the series, I think Halloween III is a pretty close contender for next best Halloween flick. Unfortunately everyone was confused. "Where the hell is Michael Myers? What did you do to our slasher flick?" the audience cried. They wanted the Shape over and over and over again.
Is it as good as the original Halloween? Not even close. It is,
however, vastly better than some of the other sequels and light years
superior to the horrible Rob Zombie remakes.
So on one side you say that if they kill a character, they should keep them dead... Then when saying go back to what works you reference Halloween 4... Which brought back Michael Myers, which they killed in part 2.
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My opinion, movies that go in a good direction is what makes a sequel good. This is why it was harder for Rocky to have good sequels then Star Trek. Rocky movies would always have the, can I win the boxing match against this person. The biggest reason I think Rocky IV was excepted better, besides Survivors Eve of the Tiger,was the underdog training sequence that gave it it's iconic love. That and Dolph Lundgren portrayal of the Russian machine gave everyone that patriotic feel.
Things I have noticed... First, 3D is no guarantee of success, examples... Clash of the titans remake. Test audiences said the 3D effect made the movie even worse. Jaws 3D... All the 3D effects could NOT make up for a stupid storyline.
Second, cast of characters, examples... Oceans 11. Oceans 11 was a fun movie, Oceans 12 was just as good, but in Oceans 13 it was obvious to everybody who watched it that everybody involved were tired of doing the Oceans movies, and it showed in the lackluster acting and scriptwriting. Starship Troopers. The first movie was good, but the second went from a cast of thousands to a cast of about ten, and everything happened in one building. Then the stupid ending was as insulting as the infamous "Everything was just a bad dream" season opener the TV series "Dallas" did. Starship Troopers 3 went direct-to-DVD and wound up Direct-To-5$ bin at walmart.
Also, remakes rarely hit as well as the original. Examples... The "Conan The Barbarian", "Total Recall", and "Psycho" remakes did not last very long at the box office, nor on Video-On-Demand on cable. The "Robocop" remake is likely to do the same.
@arthurdentrgv Unfortunately we're never going to see a remake of actual quality. Cape Fear was it.
@EliasAlgorithm @arthurdentrgv Cape Fear is the rare exception of a good remake. Others. like the canceled Wonder Woman TV series and the Bay remake of Ninja Turtles were panned before they even aired.
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@arthurdentrgv To be fair, Clash of the Titans was a cheap post-production 3D conversion, with all the "3D quality" of a pop-up book.
>Ian Malcolm in JPLW
Hah! I made that reference in the JP4 article's comments, so I giggled
Wait! Did I just read that adding gratuitous 3D is the 2nd *best* way to to handle a fourth film in a franchise?!? Sure if you are trying to appeal to the part of the audience that enjoys headaches and wearing uncomfortable glasses.
Besides, everybody knows it is the 3rd movie that you are supposed to do in 3D. Duh!
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@JuliusGryphon It's with the qualifier "If you can't think of anything else," i.e. if the series has no ideas going for it.
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@Canadian.Scott @Gallen_Dugall If it makes you feel better scott, I love your new picture.
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@Canadian.Scott @Lithroe @OneMinuteGalactica Is that the one where it's just long shots of the interiors of peoples expensive homes and then random stuff jumps out?
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@Canadian.Scott @OneMinuteGalactica Sorry Scott, you know I got your back on most things, but I gotta agree with Galactica here.
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JP IV needs a Steve Irwin type character: a guy who loves dinosaurs a bit too much and gets intimate with them at all the wrong times.
I didn't understand the Ian Malcolm reference. I read Jurassic Park way back around '91, but I don't remember Malcolm dying. I remember a leg injury, though. Did he die and I forgot it?
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@OneMinuteGalactica At the end, when they board the chopper that is evacuating everybody, Alan Grant asks Ellie Sattler "Where is Malcolm?" and she shakes her head, implying that he died from the injuries. After the first movie came out, and since John Goldblum plays Ian Malcolm,which makes him the coolest of all character, Michael Crichton wrote in The Lost World that "the news of his death were exaggerated" or something to tha effect. Literary Retcon!!!
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@FabioRezende The Internet destroyed my memory, I guess, along with my brain in general. Thanks.
I had totally forgotten they'd pulled a Rambo (who died in the First Blood book).
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Amazing. All this talk of another sequel to Jurassic Park, & yet not one person so far has posted the clip of what we all want our dream JP sequel to be. Quite an incredible display of restraint.
Alas, I have no such restraint when it comes to this clip, so...http://youtu.be/nerv5YEiJok
Also, should Saw IV count, since it technically took place right alongside Saw III? If we're going to find loopholes that try & say Star Trek V was really the fourth film, then Saw V was really the fourth film as well...And that one did suck, largely because of a complete lack of Tobin Bell & a weaksauce replacement antagonist with none of the depth or charm.
So you're still right, Luke...You just technically had the wrong film. =P
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Hmmm, Jurassic Park 4 ... It will obviously be about a zombie T. rex looking to get laid before the end of the world after having been released by Dr. Grant and Dr. Saddler's son as played by The Beef. It will agree to help him hunt down the evil corporate scientist son of John Hammond's ex-wife's, sister's, daughter's, husband's, uncle's, roommate's former love child, you know Dennis Nedry's kid who wants to re-invent the dinosaur park with a Twinkie theme using Nedry's old software suite.
And this will all take place in space where they will be attempting to blow up and asteroid to avoid a new dinosaur extinction.
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I'll add to this list - Keep the title short and to the point
"Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" and "The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies" come to mind as just gratuitous and pointlessly long titles
especially when you ask the question WTF was the crystal skull's "kingdom"? and realize that everyone shortens it to Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull because that kingdom part of the title adds three words that make no sense at all
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@Gallen_Dugall Sorry man, The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombie, is a work of genius is the title department. I'll give you Skull though.
@Lithroe Skull's title is pure Lucas self rip off
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Arc
the word kingdom is there just so that the titles have the same number of words and phrasing
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Jurassic Park IV: T-Rexes with Rocket Launchers
Jurassic Park IV: Rise of the Nazi Dinosaurs
Jurassic Park IV: Mecha T-Rex vs. Godzilla
Jurassic Park IV: Eats, Shoots, and Leaves
@gagagalvatron Fuck yeah! Make it a live action version of Dino Riders (Google it toddlers) and title it Jurassic Park IV - War of the Extinct!
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i donno about star trek 4 - to me, it felt as if they ignored the first film altogether and just rebooted with wrath of khan, thus 2, 3, 4 represent a complete trilogy. the true "fourth" would then be star trek 5. yeah, let that sink in.
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@DrAbraxas Star Trek V does not exist. Star Trek V does not exist. Star Trek V does not exist...
@fishercl64 @DrAbraxas Eh, even when the movie fails, it fails as a Star Trek flick, thereby putting it light years ahead of that reboot nonsense that was only Star Trek because someone put the name on the title card.
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@fishercl64 @DrAbraxas What does God need with a star ship?!
It makes my brain hurt when that's a sudden a giant epiphany.
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@fishercl64 @DrAbraxas you know the one! spock with a half brother that came out of the writers' asses. "god" needing a spaceshipt. ohura's fan dance.
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nice list. including agreeing with the bit about number four on the bad list setting things in space when they do not call for it . for what were the producers of hell raiser and the leparchaun films thinking oh lets let the lepchaun go nuts looking for his gold in the stars . plus 5 on the good list should really be number one
