I'll totally download it for free on the Internet... and then I won't watch it. Just to be a dick
I give you the movie that definitely hopes to be the next Snakes on a Plane...preferably with higher grosses. Because monsters are always more fun when people of color swear in their presence.
It looks like an interesting mix of CG, puppetry and stop-motion - I'm not sure it entirely gels, or even if it's meant to, but it already looks better than a Syfy original, simply because it has more face-melting and the word "ass" in the title.
Since the title's not hyphenated, perhaps I should point out that all spiders have relatively big asses. But when I watch the trailer, my grammar-cop exterior melts away with glee just like that one guy's skin. Check it out after the jump.
More links from around the web!
21 comments
At first I was like "nah, man, nah" then I saw Greg Grunberg and I was all like "OHAI!"
Which is my way of saying that I won't pay to watch it but I will watch it.
1 Like
Saw some behind the scenes stuff on this one one of those Monster Maker or Monster Men shows and man for a hack low budget director that guy who did the intro Mike Mendez sure was a jerk. Kind of ruined it for me.
@tedsallis You're right, i didn't realize it until you mentioned it right now...but that is where i have seen this contraption before.
Snakes on a Plane succeeded for me because the attempts to censor it just made it funnier.
This will not succeed for me because it involves a giant spider and while I am doing better, I want everything with more than six legs to die right now, dissolve into pixie dust and fuck right the hell away from this dimension.
I am the most likely to suddenly get spider-powers because the universe has a sense of humor and is already on record as hating me back.
"Don't download this for free." Don't worry I won't. If this was airing commercial-free on TV and there was nothing else good on, I'd turn it to the 700 Club before watching that shit movie.
their primitive (book) lung would not support a spider of that size. it would literally suffocate. yeah, it's not doing anything for me. :(
1 Like
I am not sure why the director would be worried about me downloading this. That would entail me giving half a flying F!@%
1 Like
Actually the hyphen should go between the ass and spider.
They all said I was crazy...said the ass-spider didn't exist...WELL WHO'S CRAZY NOW!?
1 Like
Big Ass Spider. Eight Legged Freaks. Why do giant spider movies hate hyphens?
1 Like
Holy shit. At first I thought this was the spider built on Monster Man. Then I noticed the title, Big Ass Spider vrs. Mega Spider. Then I googled Mega Spider.
It fucking is! Cool.
2 Like
I'm confused.. the spider has a big ass? There's a type of spider called an ass and this one is big?
I believe much booze will be involved as I investigate this further.
