It Was Inevitable…Silence of the Lambs Chianti

Remember the ’90s, when the idea of making collectibles and merchandise based on gory serial-killer movies was actually controversial?

Yeah, that sucked. Took us years to get a decent Hannibal Lecter toy. And while Tobe Hooper has yet to license Sawyer Family Chili (oh, you know that’s coming one day), you can now role-play cannibalism with the official Chianti of Thomas Harris’ hedonistic human-eater, courtesy of – who else? – the Alamo Drafthouse. (Too bad Hufu doesn’t still exist to accompany it.)

Cannibal Chianti and Suit Yourself Pinot Grigio are available to order online – subject, of course, to whatever moronic restrictions your state may have about transporting alcohol across borders. They may be purchased individually, or in a set that comes with fava beans, a recipe for cooking liver, and a bottle of lotion for it to put upon its skin.

Now, Alamo, find a way to get Paul Giamatti to play his character in Sideways and assess this beverage for one of your promos. I ask only because it seems like you folks can do anything you want to.