The Doctor doesn't usually make straw-man arguments, but this time he might consider an exception...
Snugbury's ice cream in the UK makes a giant straw sculpture every year for some reason (possibly they think it'll bring back their GOD-DAMN honey), and this year, the enduring homicidal cyborg made the cut. It's 35 feet tall, big enough to make the whole climbing stairs issue irrelevant.
What this has to do with ice cream totally escapes me, but it seems they'll also have a DaLICK flavor cone available. I would hope it includes mixed-in Jelly Babies.
Semi-related, via Geeks of Doom: