Here I thought the man had integrity. That he'd stay classy. That he wasn't just some drunk who reads whatever he's told to read.
I was, apparently, a complete moron. How could I have missed all the signs?
And yet...that hair! That gravitas! I think I'm compelled to buy whatever he's selling nonetheless. Check out his Dodge commercials after the jump, and see if you can resist what no woman ever could*.
*according to Mr. Burgundy, whom I really should have no reason to doubt.