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The Walking Dead SPOILER Recap – Tyreese’s Pieces


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I like when directors are at the point where they’ve earned the right to get weird. Tonight was Greg Nicotero’s turn, but I feel like there was a conflict between being as offbeat as he wanted and making sure viewers understood things – so the exposition was rubbed in a bit too much.

-Tyreese appears to remember everything as over-exposed film, which means Quentin Tarantino’s crusade to preserve film is successful in the future.

-Lennie James is still MIA, making that officially the worst season premiere teaser ever, because you know it won’t actually pay off until the season finale now.

-Ouch. In the future, your autographed collectible becomes “a clean shirt.” Take that, Walking Dead fans who collect stuff!

-When his parents named their kid Noah, I guess they had no idea it would be ironic because in fact he won’t save anybody from global disaster. Or maybe they saw the Darren Aronofsky version right after conceiving.

-Any excuse to have the governor back, even as a vision, is fun. Now, can we get him to star as Liam Neeson in the TV biopic of Liam Neeson? I even have a title for you: “Liam Neeson: A Particular Set of Skills.” Watch it in the dark, man.

-Honestly, I was glad to see Tyreese get bitten. He has been displaying the least convincing fictional PTSD I’ve seen in a long time – and that includes Optimus Prime in Transformers: Age of Extinction. It’s like their logic was, “Let’s get the biggest, baddest looking dude we can find, and make him nearly cry every show. CONTRAST!”

-His life is flashing before his eyes, but he hears fake radio instead?

-Ghost Merle should have shown up and said something racist.

-Michonne’s freakout about Washington feels like the demands of a script, and not her character. Although if they get there, somebody should make a joke about how Washington’s gun control laws screwed them when zombies attacked.

-Slow-mo zombie head shot! More of that, please.

-Is it me, or did Chris Hardwick seem kinda depressed and not his usual obnoxious peppy self in the Talking Dead promo? Is he sad his show was bumped to later tonight?

-Okay, you seriously cut his arm way too low for a guy who got bitten a while ago. Shoulder or nothing.

-And now you bury him without a head-shot? You totally WANT zombie Tyreese in a future episode, right?

-I know there’d be no drama with a happy ending, but wouldn’t there be at least one human holdout base that isn’t run either incompetently or by a psychotic asshole? The odds ought to favor it somewhere, right?

-The avalanche of torsos is fun. I’m hoping there’s a point to the way the dead are specifically dismembered here.

Your thoughts?