The Makers of Hello Kitty Introduce Their Newest Creation of Cute – Gudetama, a Sentient Egg Yolk.

Meet Gudetama.

You might as well meet him now, because the women of the world will force you to acknowledge his existence sooner or later. Launched in Japan two years ago, the character, who if you think about it is basically a chicken fetus, is hitting the U.S. in merchandise form starting today.

This lazy egg rocks himself to sleep in his shell, curls up in a bacon blanket, takes naps on a bed of rice, and has no motivation but to lay around.

Oh good. This will help Hello Kitty fans get used to the idea of having a husband.

Naturally, being Japanese, some of the merchandise imagery is a bit odd.

Here we see Gudetama apparently needing a pee break before being eaten as part of a complete meal.

And here’s Gudetama showing his ass.

Here, in the image that absolutely slew my wife, is Gudetama in a little hat. Several million in sales just got guaranteed. No, trust me, it did.

The first U.S. Gudetama merchandise is now available to buy at Sanrio.com