Ask Luke's Mother-in-Law: A Wish for Johnny Depp to Ditch the Whiteface

Thursday, January 8, 2015 at 6:30 am

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In which ex-cop/crazy cat lady/mom-in-law Martha Boyd answers your questions from the coziness of the Joshua Tree desert. All questions and answers are real.

Hello and welcome to 2015, everyone. Here is to a great year. Here is one for all of you: I FINALLY LEARNED HOW TO TEXT. Over the holiday, Julia finally convinced me to turn on John's Samsung G3 and ditch the flip phone. Then she taught me how to text. Now, this is something John loved to do. Not sure how he managed; his fingers were rather large. I have tiny hands and I can't hit the correct letters - so how he ever did it is anyone's guess. Well, I now know how to use a touch screen and to text, and I even figured out how to find an Internet connection away from home. Okay, you can now all get up off the ground, dust yourselves off and stop laughing. There are days I still long for paper and pencil. I have the old ATT endless data plan, so look out, world.

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We Tried Reader-Created Nerdy Cocktails...and Have a Winner!

Wednesday, January 7, 2015 at 3:30 pm

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To win some Star Wars figures, I asked you all to submit New Year's nerdy cocktail ideas...ones that had to be actually drinkable. Not all of you followed that guideline.

But from those who did, I culled eleven of the best...and made them. Then a panel which included TR contributors Julia Thompson, Brian Hanson, Fred Topel, Bryce Abood and others tried them.

And I'm not just going to tell you who won. I'm going to make you watch the video so you can see our insta-reactions. If you want to be reminded of what's actually in the drinks, here's a link to the old comment thread.

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Gingerbread Smaug Is a Baked-Goods Benediction

Tuesday, December 30, 2014 at 1:00 pm

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Sure, you've always thought Benedict Cumberbatch looked good enough to eat, but the odds of you ever getting any part of him in your mouth are slim to none. His alter-ego Smaug, on the other hand, just got made into a giant, elaborate piece of cookie art that's like a Battle of the Five Armies in my pants. Not that I even have any idea what that means, but it sounds vaguely dirty, so what the hell.

There's time-lapse video, too - though it weirdly doesn't seem to have any audio, so just get a friend to say "Peng-wings" over and over while you watch it for the full effect...

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Meet Mac Sabbath, a Black Sabbath Cover Band of McDonald's Characters

Monday, December 29, 2014 at 7:30 am

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It's a combination that makes sense, if you think about it. Both Ozzy Osbourne and a Big Mac contain way more chemicals than they should, are needlessly fatty after a lifetime of self-indulgence, and have a crazy, red-headed clown as their spokesperson.

Check out their version of "Iron Man," entitled "Frying Pan." I can only assume their version of "War Pigs" would be entitled "McRibs." And yes, OF COURSE they have T-shirts.

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Merry Christmas! Have Some Free Star Wars Figures!

Thursday, December 25, 2014 at 6:00 am

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Thanks to our friends at Fun.com, TR has a Christmas/New Year's present for one lucky reader: a set of four Star Wars Black Series 6" figures! You'll get X-Wing Pilot Luke, Han Solo, Slave Leia and a fourth figure that will EITHER be Greedo OR a newer character, depending on whether or not Fun.com gets others in stock.

Since this contest will close at noon on New Year's Day, 2015, let's have us a cocktail contest. Create a recipe for a Topless Robot-themed cocktail and leave it in comments below. I will select a few of the best and actually drink them to decide the winner. Wanna make a version of a mudslide and call it a "Tupper Adam"? Have at it. A classic zombie recipe with Reese's Pieces in it, called a "Zombie Rob"? Bring on your best. I ask only that it be single-serving (no directions to chug 2 liters, please), and the ingredients must be actual food or drink components (no semen or Drano, for example). Also affordable - I'm not gonna make something that requires me to buy Dom Perignon. Enter as often as you like.

Please note: prizes can ship to U.S. addresses only.

When She Hears Pink Pepsi Exists, My Wife Will Make Me Go to Japan

Thursday, December 18, 2014 at 5:00 pm

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You can say all you want about sexism and marketing and double-standards and all that, and make a lot of sense. But your logic is undone in my house whenever the words "It's pink and it's cute" are uttered as justification for any and everything.

And now Japan has made Pepsi pink and cute. Pepsi!

Okay, so you don't have to actually go to Japan to get it - Jbox has the strawberry-milk flavored beverage in stock for $3.50. But don't tell my wife that; I want to get a trip to Japan out of the deal.

Namco Will Open a Pac-Man Restaurant in Chicago

Thursday, December 18, 2014 at 3:30 pm

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Woodfield Mall

When I think of Pac-Man, I think bright colors, loud beeps, and...not that drab gray thing in the artist's rendering above. Shouldn't the entrance be through Pac-Man's mouth or something?

Points for the nicely nerdy name: Level 257, which is one more than the 256 original levels of the game, and will confuse the hell out of casual players looking for "That Pac-Man Place" online.

That said, Pac-Man and eating are a perfect match. Though to be truly accurate to the Pac experience (Paxperience?), they should make you eat while on a treadmill.

h/t Chris Ward

Ask Luke's Mother-in-Law: Mexico and the First Year Alone

Thursday, December 11, 2014 at 8:00 am

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A veteran of the LAPD, widow of a Green Beret and self-described crazy cat lady, Martha Boyd fears no questions. Ask her anything in the comments section - no issue is too big, too trivial or too weird for her to tackle, but if you get out of line, she will let you know!

All questions and answers are real.

Greetings - as some of you know I just returned from another week in Mexico. Stayed again at the Melia Puerto Vallarta. So this time we went on Delta - first time in ages I have been on a plane with a movie and they did not charge!!!!! However we were 1.5 hrs late getting off the ground out of LAX. The return trip was another first; only 40 people on the plane, everyone had their own row of 3 seats - they ran the flight with only that small number, so overall I was happy with the airline.

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Weekend Open Thread - Happy Repeal Day!

Friday, December 5, 2014 at 6:01 pm

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Matt Chan

Whether you are Democrat, Republican or other, the fact that FDR repealed Prohibition on this day in 1933 makes him one of the greatest presidents of all time in my book.

As I'm sure the first external item anyone will be posting in this thread will be about Roberto Orci and Star Trek 3, let me offer my thoughts on that...

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Ask Luke's Mother-in-Law: A Mom Review of Jason Momoa's Road to Paloma

Thursday, December 4, 2014 at 8:00 am

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A veteran of the LAPD, widow of a Green Beret and self-described crazy cat lady, Martha Boyd fears no questions. Ask her anything in the comments section - no issue is too big, too trivial or too weird for her to tackle, but if you get out of line, she will let you know!

All questions and answers are real.

Hello and after-Thanksgiving greetings. I hope you all survived the massive day of gluttony. I was on an airplane to Mexico. Yep, another trip down south of the border. So it was airport food until we landed and got to the hotel. Well, not really all airport food. We got coffee, but as we were picked up at 5 am for a 10 am flight I had packed some nice muffins in a lunch bag and then brought munchies for the airplane. The dollar store is a great place for this, as you can get things in small packages. The coffee, soda and juice are still free on the plane and it is only about a 3 hr flight. So we had cookies, crackers with cream cheese and breakfast bars for the plane. We went to dinner early the first night - right at 5 when they start serving. Here is what I have almost every day at the resort for lunch by the pool: California roll, chips with salsa, soup and salad. They have a really good soup station and the salad bar is well stocked. Then back to the pool for more swimming and a couple of more margaritas. This place is totally eat, drink, swim, sun, repeat. Weather was in the 80's and very nice. A bit warmer then what I left in So Cal. LYT gave me Thanksgiving off as he was taking the day off too and thus I was missing last week. But now I'M BACK and you can't escape.


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