A shock-rock monster from Antarctica - whom over 44,000 fans would like to see play the Superbowl halftime show - might not be the guy you want reading a bedtime story - he has a terrible tendency to improv in typically foul and disturbing ways. His description of his own childhood, however, is priceless.
Watch after the jump. Samuel L. Jackson's reading of "Go the Fuck to Sleep" suddenly seems a lot more benign by comparison.More >>
You have not truly experienced Rick Astley until you've heard him in the original Klingon.
Klingon torture used to be very unsubtle. In embracing the Rick Roll, they are adding a devious new element of mental warfare to the game, and slowly trying to drive us puny humans mad.
Click ahead if you dare...because there's a terrifying bonus video after the jump as well.More >>
Collecting the best in reader submissions from the weekend open thread...
-Japanese-age Mutant Ninja Burger, hero to your taste buds. Coronary power! (SlyDante777)
-The Shadow Warrior Mini-Game that lets you be a more literal kind of cleaner (Anyone00).More >>
I remember the first and only time I appeared in a semi-popular YouTube video. Although I was used to the occasionally inane comment on my written work, this was a whole new deal, between people calling me a fat Mexican and saying that I needed to die, preferably by my own hand. I learned pretty quickly that any comments section over there was a swamp to stay out of - but when somebody wades in and turns it into art, it's like the Irish making valuable peat briquettes out of disgusting bogs.
(Oh, for the benefit of those who don't know Ireland - peat briquettes are a home fuel like coal, and bogs are basically swamps. "Bog" is also slang for toilet, which tells you something.)
Point being, the YouTube Comments Choir have turned some terrible things into greatness - to partly quote Mark in The Room, these were stupid comments best NOT left in anyone's pocket - and while I seldom intend for mini-themes to crop up in a day of posting, it just so happens that my two favorite things today were videos full of swearing.
But look at the screencap above and tell me I could not, should not have shown this to you. Then click the jump to hear it in all its glory.More >>
What's this? What's this? It's what Jack Skellington might have actually sung, were he not trapped in a Disney movie.
Coincidentally, it's also what I say every time I hear about whatever remake it is Tim Burton's doing next with Johnny Depp and Helena Bonham Carter.
Inspired by an oft-reblogged Tumblr post, Jack's signature song is now called "The fuck?" And it is a thing of beauty.
Watch after the jump, but don't play it aloud at work or anything.More >>
"Super Terrific" is often used ironically in this context, as you know. And there's a level of said facetiousness at play in this here post, too - take one noisy, obnoxious thing and have it mimic a different noisy, obnoxious thing - but that would be missing the subtext.
This violin player can imitate the sound of a police siren. He could have been the next typecast comedian in a Police Academy reboot...or used his powers for evil to scare away other criminals and make off with their haul. Instead, he has used his obvious talents to make a viral video.
Thanks, YouTube. You have saved the world again.
Nothing says metal like a nice Christmas sweater. Wait, no...
Nothing says metal in any way about a Christmas sweater. I think that's right. Or is it...
Nothing says "inappropriate for a Christian holiday" like a sweater with upside-down crosses on it? Don't worry, if that's an issue they have an alternate option:
These were not made by obsessive fans and put on Etsy. These are official merchandise. I'm sure band members might make the case that they're being subversive by turning an inoffensive symbol of kitsch into heavy metal propaganda - but I suspect Lars probably just one day said "What haven't we slapped our logo on yet?"
I can answer that, Lars. Let me introduce you to Tasha Reign some day.
You know how Shatner's kinda gotten less funny since he became self-aware that his dramatic pauses and speak-singing were loved for being so terrible? And then Ben Folds produced an album for him, that got decent reviews? And he did a double-disc of sci-fi cover tunes with celebrity guests after that?
I think it might have gotten to his head, as unlikely as that concept surely must seem for William Shatner. And this is great news for those of us who enjoy horribly bad things. As they say in Ghost World, it's so bad it's gone past good and back to bad again. But it has the potential to push even further to double bad-goodness. It is, after all, "quite possibly the most creative thing I have ever done," sayeth he.
Amazon has audio samples from the album up now, and it's full of cheesy, maudlin chorus, awful saxophone and the Shat seriously intoning lyrics like, "He's only a dog...you may say...He's...lying around...and...INtheway! Paws and tongues and lots of leanings...everything a dog does has meaning."
Ponder the mystery, indeed. The mystery of why people like Steve Vai and Robby Krieger need money so badly that they helped make this.
I've been to many a press screening, but Metallica: Through the Never is the first one I've been to where free earplugs were handed out. It's a marketing touch William Castle and Alfred Hitchcock would have been proud of, and one I'd suggest the publicists should have happen at every screening, mentioned in every ad. The 3D Imax surcharges should cover the cost. (I didn't actually need them in the end.)
Being a Metallica fan is a bit like being a Star Wars fan. You can't tell anybody you are one without IMMEDIATELY hearing how great the old stuff is and how it's an absolute fact that everybody agrees the new stuff is terrible. I'm that guy who disagrees on both counts, though if you'd talked to me in the late '90s during the Load/Re-Load/Lollapalooza period I would have heartily agreed. The St. Anger album is my Mallrats, the one the creators now mostly disavow but that absolutely won me into the fold when it came out. And as controversial as this will be with other fans, I'll just say it: live, Robert Trujillo is a better bassist that Jason Newsted.