New Poltergeist Trailer Looks (Appropriately) Like Evil Dead for Kids

Thursday, April 2, 2015 at 7:58 am

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...by which I basically mean Evil Dead without the blood and tree rape, because kids are the main victims here and Hollywood's not going to make a movie that absolutely repulses people like that. The mayhem and the scares and the possession and all of that remains intact. And how nice is it that FOR ONCE, a movie about a family haunted pretty much within one house actually looks like it spent some money and doesn't wait till the very end to show you the cool shit?

Joe Dante's 3D movie The Hole already remade Poltergeist unofficially, but since it didn't have the brand-name it wasn't widely seen. The Sam Raimi/Rob Tapert connection is the only real factor of interest to me here, as it looks like their touch is all over things, and Drag Me to Hell had a blast being both scary and not R-rated.

Also, I finally agree with all y'all. The new clown is creepier. I concede.

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Funko Gives All of Sesame Street a Black Eye (or Two), Except Cookie Monster

Tuesday, March 31, 2015 at 9:40 am

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Now the other puppets really will be professionally jealous.

Funko's Pop Vinyl has a signature feature of black dots for eyes - it's part of the stylization that allows them to get around the fact that they don't always have actor likeness rights. But Cookie Monster, apparently, is special - he gets to keep his regular "crazy eyes."

I think the blue guy's letting fame go to his head, with all the SNL petitions and Star Wars skits and such. Next thing you know, he'll be demanding cookies that contain only brown M&Ms baked in.

Diamond Select's Nightmare Before Christmas Action Figures Revealed

Friday, March 20, 2015 at 8:00 am

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click to enlarge

Diamond wouldn't be the first to take on this license, but the diorama bases are a boon to those of us who could never get previous Jack Skellingtons to stand up straight. Sally will even come with alternate kneeling legs so the dress sculpt looks right in either signature pose. Oogie Boogie has a removable face and a stone floor base (not pictured), and Jack just has a base that pretty much rules.

And I say that not even being much of a fan of the film. So I can't imagine how badly all the goth couples who used Jack and Sally as wedding cake toppers are foaming at the mouth right now.

Ya might wanna preorder, pronto.

via ToyNewsI

Joseph Gordon-Levitt Is Making a Fraggle Rock Movie, and Is It Really Not April 1st Today?

Thursday, March 19, 2015 at 12:49 pm

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If I ran this as an April Fool post, would any of you have believed it?

"The first screen personas I ever loved were Henson creations, first on 'Sesame Street,' and then on 'Fraggle Rock,'" Gordon-Levitt said. "Jim Henson's characters make you laugh and sing, but they're also layered, surprising, and wise. From Oscar the Grouch, to Yoda, to the Fraggles. I've never stopped loving his work, even as a young frisky man, and on into adulthood. Collaborating with Lisa Henson makes me confident we can do something that Jim would have loved. I'm grateful and excited to be working with New Regency on this project."
JGL will produce AND star - I'm guessing as the guy who owns Sprocket the dog, who was played in the wraparound segments by a different actor depending which country you watched the show in. As a kid, I got very confused when Irish TV would broadcast the US episodes with an American inventor, and British TV would show the UK episodes with a Scottish lighthouse-keeper. With the star of Looper and Inception in charge, I'd love to see a storyline that reconciles all those wraparound segments within the same reality somehow.


"Life Inside Jabba the Hutt" Is Not a Porn Fanfic, but Is a Great Documentary Short

Wednesday, March 18, 2015 at 12:39 pm

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From hearing "Jabba" speaking English on set to seeing the little person hidden in his tail, this documentary short will make you understand why George Lucas much prefers CGI even though the puppet is way cooler - the sheer effort it took to pull off the Hutt's performance is amazing. And the clever way the editing hides a multitude of weaknesses shows you just how budget limits can lead to creativity.

Yes, digital is a LOT easier - but sometimes, having people suffer for their art is better for the end product.

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New CG Thunderbirds Are Go Trailer - Better Than the Original?

Friday, March 13, 2015 at 10:55 am

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Like Rob Bricken's persistent phobia of E.T., this is a drum I'm going to keep beating: for all the talk about "uncanny valley" and CG characters that we hear nowadays, nothing about digital cartoons is remotely as creepy as Gerry Anderson's marionettes were. NOTHING. Thunderbirds may be a property that does not belong in live-action, but with glassy-eyed puppets it's only good for nightmare fuel of the wrong kind, as far as I'm concerned. I have always believed this and I stand by it.

So this new CG version? It looks a million percent better to me. And if that makes me sound like George Lucas, so be it. I'll dig out my one and only plaid shirt for solidarity.

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Super Terrific Japanese Thing: Anime Hug Pillow Tells You How Much She Loves Your Boob-Grabbing

Monday, March 2, 2015 at 8:00 am

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If you're already coming here, I assume you know about full-body pillows featuring anime characters and others that the purchaser presumably wants to imagine sleeping with.

Got that concept in your head? Okay, good, because the next step is here - one that verbally expresses pleasure when you fondle her breasts. Did I say "good"? I meant "Ewww."

There's a catch - be too rough with her and her love-meter will descend into hate. And presumably then be purchased only by horrible people who enjoy ignoring consent. Better with a pillow than a person, certainly, but still...if you favor interaction with different possible outcomes, there's this great game I can suggest to you. It's called "non-creepily relating to human beings." Difficulty level is super hard at times, I know, but the rewards you can earn are worth it.

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Hide Your Booze Inside American Sniper-ish Fake Baby

Wednesday, February 18, 2015 at 12:00 pm

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An expressive, customizable, hands-free beverage insulator that looks like a baby. Drinking in public is now adorable.
American Sniper takes a lot of crap for the scene in which Bradley Cooper holds an obviously fake baby as if it's his real kid, but what if there was a good reason? Could it have concealed a flask of vodka to ease his nerves?


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For the First Time, You Can Visit the Actual Sets from Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood

Tuesday, January 27, 2015 at 12:00 pm

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Heinz History Center

Don't pretend you're too old to enjoy this.

It may be a bit of a hike for many of us, bit if you happen to be anywhere near Pittsburgh, the John Heinz History Center is currently playing host to Mr. Rogers' living room and the entire Neighborhood of Make-Believe. My head wants to make some kind of off-color joke, but my heart is unable.

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Ohio Man Forced to Remove Zombie Nativity...AFTER Christmas

Wednesday, December 24, 2014 at 4:30 pm

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Jasen Dixon of Sycamore Township, Ohio, decided to build a Christmas Nativity scene in his yard with the materials he had to hand. And as it happens, he's the manager of a horror attraction called "13 Rooms of Doom," which led to a whole bunch of his spare zombies being repurposed/ Unsurprisingly, now he's been hit with a citation to take it down. He claims his free speech is being infringed upon. Neighbors claim it's a zoning issue:

Sycamore Township, which is outside Cincinnati, does not allow structures to be located in the front or the side yard to occupy more than 35 percent of the area. Also, the primary structure must be 3 feet from the street, and 6 feet from the house.
But the small print makes it all sound like an exercise in wrist-slapping:
Dixon, who said about 40 people take photographs of what he calls "the world's first zombie Nativity scene," has until Dec. 26 to take down the scene.
Oh, so he doesn't have to take down his Christmas scene until after Christmas? That sounds like win-win to me.

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