<?xml version="1.0" encoding="utf-8"?>
<rss version="2.0">
   <channel>
      <title>Topless Robot</title>
      <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/</link>
      <description></description>
      <language>en</language>
      <copyright>Copyright 2009</copyright>
      <lastBuildDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 14:05:13 -0500</lastBuildDate>
      <generator>http://www.sixapart.com/movabletype/</generator>
      <docs>http://blogs.law.harvard.edu/tech/rss</docs> 

      
      <item>
         <title>Ong-Bak 2 Has Double the Ong, 10 Times the Bak</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object id="obj_1f866af11db04864bca16236377b518f" classid="clsid:d27cdb6e-ae6d-11cf-96b8-444553540000" codebase="http://download.macromedia.com/pub/shockwave/cabs/flash/swflash.cab#version=9,0,115,0" height="392" width="450"> <param name="movie" value="http://applications.fliqz.com/1f866af11db04864bca16236377b518f.swf" /> <param name="allowfullscreen" value="true" /> <param name="wmode" value="transparent" /> <param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /> <param name="flashvars" value="file=9f7a73b12e39445fbefe5f2d7220152e&amp;permalink=http://twitchfilm.net/site/view/22294/&amp;" /> <embed id="emb_1f866af11db04864bca16236377b518f" src="http://applications.fliqz.com/1f866af11db04864bca16236377b518f.swf" allowfullscreen="true" wmode="transparent" allowscriptaccess="always" flashvars="file=9f7a73b12e39445fbefe5f2d7220152e&amp;permalink=http://twitchfilm.net/site/view/22294/&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" height="392" width="450"> </object><br />If you're any kind of martial art flick fan, chances are you enjoyed the hell out of Tony Jaa's debut flick <i>Ong-Bak</i>, since like Jackie Chan, Jaa does all his own stunts. It was pretty cool... but it did not involve wild animals. In <i>Ong-Bak 2</i>, not only does Jaa appear to fight a crocodile, but he runs over a herd of stampeding elepphants, and even leaps backwards off one to deliver some poor thug a shin to head. It is, clinically speaking, fucking awesome. In <i>Ong-Bak 3</i> I hear Jaa is going to deliver an atomic elbow from a launching space shuttle. (<a href="http://twitchfilm.net/site/view/22294/"><i>Via Twitchfilm</i></a>)<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/ong-bak_2_has_double_the_ong_10_times_the_bak.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/ong-bak_2_has_double_the_ong_10_times_the_bak.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Movies</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Films</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Martial Arts</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 14:05:13 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>Ladies and Gay Men, I Proudly Present to You Spike and Angel, Making Out</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><table class="image left" border="0" width="570"><tbody><tr><td><a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/buffy_slash.jpg" onclick="window.open('http://www.toplessrobot.com/buffy_slash.jpg','popup','width=600,height=1280,scrollbars=no,resizable=no,toolbar=no,directories=no,location=no,menubar=no,status=no,left=0,top=0'); return false"><img alt="buffy_slash.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/assets_c/2009/07/buffy_slash-thumb-570x1216.jpg" height="1216" width="570" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></span><br />Ha ha! I found it! Nerd girl porn! Porn for nerdy girls! And nerdy gay men! Well, <a href="http://io9.com/5307122/your-spikeangel-slash-just-became-canon-kinda">io9</a> found it, but still -- this is a page from a three-page <i>Buffy the Vampire Slayer</i> comic written by Joss Whedon himself, available for free over at <a href="http://www.darkhorse.com/Features/eComics/1087/Dark-Horse-Presents-No-24?part_num=0&amp;page=1">Dark Horse</a>. Now admittedly, it is part of a dream sequence, and the kiss happens off-panel (Shatterstar and Rictor could show these guys a thing or two about PDA). But it has been drawn by the amazing Jo Chen, whose <i>Buffy</i> covers have actually <a href="http://www.pinkraygun.com/wp-content/uploads/buffy2.jpg">made me a little gay for Xander</a>, something Nicholas Brendon couldn't pull off. Anyways, enjoy. It's a bit overdue.<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/ladies_and_gay_men_i_proudly_present_to_you_spike.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/ladies_and_gay_men_i_proudly_present_to_you_spike.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Comics</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">TV</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Buffy the Vampire Slayer</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Dark Horse</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Joss Whedon</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 13:36:58 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>A Peek at the Potential Marvel Legends</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/0703mv2_full.jpg" onclick="window.open('http://www.toplessrobot.com/0703mv2_full.jpg','popup','width=691,height=1050,scrollbars=no,resizable=no,toolbar=no,directories=no,location=no,menubar=no,status=no,left=0,top=0'); return false"><img alt="0703mv2_full.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/assets_c/2009/07/0703mv2_full-thumb-300x455.jpg" height="455" width="300" /></a></span><span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/0703mv3_full.jpg" onclick="window.open('http://www.toplessrobot.com/0703mv3_full.jpg','popup','width=482,height=1050,scrollbars=no,resizable=no,toolbar=no,directories=no,location=no,menubar=no,status=no,left=0,top=0'); return false"><img alt="0703mv3_full.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/assets_c/2009/07/0703mv3_full-thumb-250x544.jpg" height="455" width="180" /></a></span><br />If you're done with Marvel Legends -- and I couldn't blame you if you were -- then I apologize. It's just as a toy collector, I've been desperately following all Marvel Legends news for so long that it's hard for me to not mention when something newsworthy happens regarding the 6-inch figures. For instance, Hasbro revealed three of the potential figures that they'll be showing off at SDCC -- Warpath, the Multiple Man and Lady Bullseye -- and every nerdy cell in my body is screaming at me to mention. Remember, these are Fan Choice figures, so they have to be voted on to get made according to Hasbro:<br /><blockquote><font style="font-size: 1em;" size="-2"><i>"There's a new wave of Marvel Legends 2
Packs on the way in 2010 and you help to decide who's in them. The
basics are simple - six total characters, you pick three and we pick
three. Sound like fun? Voting for this all new Fan's Choice will start
on July 22nd when we reveal all of the possible choices at San Diego
Comic Con."</i></font><br /></blockquote>Head over to <a href="http://16bit.com/">16bit.com</a> to see <a href="http://16bit.com/newspics09/0703mv1_full.jpg">Warpath</a> and if you want me to knock this shit off, let me know in the comments.<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/a_peek_at_the_potential_marvel_legends.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/a_peek_at_the_potential_marvel_legends.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Comics</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Toys</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Hasbro</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Marvel</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Marvel Legends</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 11:15:18 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>Trigun: The Movie: The Trailer</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HCcEv0gFnpM&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HCcEv0gFnpM&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="385" width="480"></object><br />Holy shit. I can't believe this is happening. Not because I'm a huge <i>Trigun</i> fan or anything, but because it's so phenomenally late. Okay, I'm turning into my crotchety old anime guru phase, but bear with me. The <i>Trigun</i> TV series aired in Japan in 1998. It wasn't anything special. But when Geneon (nee Pioneer) brought it over to America in 2000, it sold like gangbusters -- and sold consistently enough that Adult Swim aired it in 2003. Obviously, there was a huge demand for more <i>Trigun</i> in America, money just waiting to be made. And waiting. And waiting.<br /><br />In 2005, the president of Madhouse, the studio that animated Trigun, mentioned at a U.S. con&nbsp; that he was working on a <i>Trigun</i> movie. Then more waiting. And still more. And now finally, in mid-2009, more than 10 years after the series first aired in Japan and nearly 10 since <i>Trigun</i>'s U.S. heyday, a trailer for the elusive <i>Trigun</i> movie surfaced at Anime Expo this past weekend.<br /><br />I'm not saying a <i>Trigun</i> movie won't make money nowadays, but it won't make half as much as it would've in 2003 or even 2005. I understand this does nothing to fix the problems of online piracy, but still -- the Japanese anime industry had plenty of chances to make a ton of money if they had just given a shit about America once in a while. Just sayin'. (<a href="http://www.animevice.com/news/first-look-at-trigun-the-movie/1671/"><i>Via AnimeVice</i></a>)<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/trigun_the_movie_the_trailer.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/trigun_the_movie_the_trailer.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Anime</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Anime Movies</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Trigun</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 10:35:17 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>New G.I. Joe Trailer Includes a Visit from the Doctor</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FOyYoK4W7Q4&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FOyYoK4W7Q4&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="385" width="480"></object><br />It's only a second, but yeah -- here's "The Doctor" in all his non-glory, thanks to a new Japanese trailer full of much of the same shit we've seen in the other trailers. He's chilling with Destro, wearing his monocle and his odd-little Plo Koon mask, and his oddly '90s hair. Really, that's it. Nothing else new. It's just kind of awkward and sad, especially when you remember the Doctor's name is actually the ominous "Rex Lewis." Sigh. Let's just move on. (<a href="http://www.theterrordrome.com/2009/07/new-rise-of-cobra-trailer-features-first-look-doctor-rex/"><i>Via The Terror Drome</i></a>)<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/new_gi_joe_trailer_includes_a_visit_from_the_docto.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/new_gi_joe_trailer_includes_a_visit_from_the_docto.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Movies</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Toys</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">G.I. Joe</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Hasbro</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Toy Movies</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 09:45:14 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>When Donkey Kongs Attack</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object height="340" width="560"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/_UCPNf8A_8s&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/_UCPNf8A_8s&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="340" width="560"></object><br />Welcome back, folks. I hope you had a tragic weekend, full of self-loathing and misery after reading the Pokémon story that you all demanded and that I tried so valiantly not to show you. I hope that will teach you that some things only Daddy touch, okay? There's a ton of stuff to get through today, but let's start with a little live-action Donkey Kong made entirely of post-it notes. It's quite impressive, not least of which because I had no idea they made brown post-its. (<a href="http://www.iheartchaos.com/content/real-life-stop-motion-donkey-kong-i-heart-video-games"><i>Via I Heart Chaos</i></a>)<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/when_donkey_kongs_attack.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/when_donkey_kongs_attack.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Nerdery</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Video Games</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Donkey Kong</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Impressive Acts of Nerdery</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 09:07:35 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>The 10 Most Heinously Corporate Videogames</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><table class="image right" border="0" width="300"><tbody><tr><td><a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/11x01c.jpg" onclick="window.open('http://www.toplessrobot.com/11x01c.jpg','popup','width=316,height=320,scrollbars=no,resizable=no,toolbar=no,directories=no,location=no,menubar=no,status=no,left=0,top=0'); return false"><img alt="11x01c.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/assets_c/2009/07/11x01c-thumb-300x303.jpg" height="303" width="300" /></a></td></tr></tbody></table></span><i>By Caleb Goellner</i><br /><br />Consumer culture is a mixed blessing. We have cool gadgets, free network TV and junk food available at every whim. This utopia comes with a hefty price tag, though, and it's not just free will or individuality or whatever the hippies like to argue - it's awful videogames. Capitalism is alright most of the time and gamers understand that their precious platforms ain't a charity - it's all about supply and demand, which is why historically, the number of games touting established licenses practically merits its own genre. Pimping a movie tie-in, cartoon or sports star can be ridiculously lucrative and really, there's nothing wrong with the practice as long as the games accomplish the prime directive: being awesome and fun. Unfortunately the lust for money has pushed many developers into releasing less-than-stellar games in the name of branding over the years. The quality of these games ranges from simply uninspired to straight up unplayable -- smacking gamers with IPs like a canoe paddle to the parietal lobe. Read on to examine the ten corporate games most worthy of snob scorn and hippie hostilities.<br /><br /> ]]>
         <![CDATA[<a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/the_10_most_heinously_corporate_videogames.php">Continue reading "The 10 Most Heinously Corporate Videogames" ></a>]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/the_10_most_heinously_corporate_videogames.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/the_10_most_heinously_corporate_videogames.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Daily Lists</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Video Games</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Fast Food</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Food</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Nintendo</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Playstation</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Sega</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Xbox 360</category>
        
         <pubDate>Mon, 06 Jul 2009 07:56:32 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>Captain America, @#$% Yeah</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object height="385" width="480"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/4CbbtIoUceI&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/4CbbtIoUceI&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="385" width="480"></object><br />I know I'm supposed to be off, but it's the fourth of July and <a href="http://gorillamask.net/">Gorilla Mask</a> linked to this, and I just couldn't <i>not</i> post it. Happy Independence Day, American-type people.<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/captain_america_yeah.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/captain_america_yeah.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Comics</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Nerdery</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Captain America</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Holidays</category>
        
         <pubDate>Sat, 04 Jul 2009 14:04:39 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>I Can&apos;t End It Like This</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object height="340" width="560"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Pj5HDqipQYw&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Pj5HDqipQYw&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="340" width="560"></object><br />I had planned to end my day with the dreaded Pokémon story, leaving it at the top of <b>Topless Robot</b> all weekend to punish you bastards for your hubris, but I just can't. Not all of you begged me to run it, and you don't deserve to see the pic of the pre-festivities Gardevoir all holiday weekend. So here's one of my favorite videos of all time, now in the least shitty quality I've ever seen.<br /><br />This is the legendary Daicon IV animation, a short anime for a Japanese sci-fi con from 1984. It's a sequel to the anime short from the Daicon 3 con (which gets recapped in the very beginning), and is set to the awesome E.L.O. song "Twilight" (from their album <i>Time</i>, which is absolutely phenomenal). Even if you're not an anime fan, if you have any desire to see a girl in a bunny outfit kick the ass of virtually every sci-fi franchise up through 1983, I think you'll enjoy it. Believe it or not, it's all fan-made... although those fan very shortly got together to form an anime studio called Gainax.<br /><br />I hope it helps ease the pain for some of you. Have a great weekend, and I'll see you back here on Monday. <br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/i_cant_end_it_like_this.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/i_cant_end_it_like_this.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Anime</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Nerdery</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Daikon</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Gainax</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Impressive Acts of Nerdery</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 15:03:36 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>Fan Fiction Friday: The Pokémon Story</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><table class="image right" border="0" width="266"><tbody><tr><td><img alt="gardevoir.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/gardevoir.jpg" height="265" width="266" /></td></tr></tbody></table></span>You asked for it. When you're done reading, and you realize that everything you thought was potentially good in life was a lie, please remember, this is your own fault. You bastards are the ones who begged and demanded me to run this. I didn't want to. You made me. In fact, this story is so horrible that I'm not even going to comment on it, because that would require me re-reading it. You get it complete and unadulterated by my comedy. And then you can try and pick up the pieces of your ruined weekend and shattered life. The story is called "rectified anonymity" and it is by author David Garrett. One final warning -- if last week's story of Luke and Leia and Han pooping and fucking and killing themselves made you at all uncomfortable, do not read this. I'm utterly serious. This is quantifiably 100 times worse, because it's written in utter seriousness.<br /><br />And so it begins.<br /><blockquote>Rain spattered across the sand, causing a deafening roar, like that of
a hundred semis crashing into each other in apocalyptic glory. The
crack of thunder split the insanity, and wind swept it up into a
cacophony of natural horror. All the while David sat glumly, shielding
himself from the gale beneath a rather large tree. He was soaked to the
bone and miserable. Lost in Kanto, with no map, no pokedex, no food,
and no company other than his beloved pokemon. He was sure he'd die of
hypothermia or worse.<br /><br />
David sighed, clinging tightly to his umbrella which proved of little
worth except for some sort of moral booster. His soaked blond hair
clung tightly to his body. With an absent hand he fondled the pokeballs
on his lap. He clicked the switch on the front, releasing Gardevoir, to
stand beside him.<br /><br />
"Garde..?" she whispered to him soothingly.<br />
"No, I'm fine Gardevoir. I just wanted some to be with," he replied,
barely audible to the young pokemon above the ripping winds. A shallow
tear formed on the rim of his red eyes but was blotted out the rest of
the water that coagulated on everything within sight.<br /><br />
She patted his shoulder. She was so cute, even for a pokemon. Her thin
hips swayed, her plant-like hair messed by the storm. No, no, what are
you doing, he thought. She's an animal.<br /><br />
But yet she was so much like a human, only smaller, and covered in
fauna. Plus there was no one around for miles, and no amount of
masturbating could satiate the lust he felt out in the wilderness... if
only he could feel the flesh of a woman against his.<br /><br />
He put a loving arm around his Gardevoir, pulling her close and
whispered; "Gardevoir, you know that I'm your trainer, right? Your
master?"<br /><br />
"Gard," she nodded in agreement. He nodded in return.<br />
"And would you do anything for me?"<br />
"Garde," she nodded again. He moved another hand to her, sliding it
over her wasp waist and looking carefully into her eyes. She seemed to
begin to understand, a look of fear welled in her eyes. David could
feel a lump in his pants swell as he began to force her upon the soaked
ground. The sky rumbled with thunder all around them, the tree above
them creaked threateningly.<br /><br />
The best thing about a pokemon is that they'll never be able to tell anyone about it.<br /></blockquote>






The rest continues after the jump. And you have no one to blame but yourselves.<br /> ]]>
         <![CDATA[<a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/fan_fiction_friday_the_pokemon_story.php">Continue reading "Fan Fiction Friday: The Pokémon Story" ></a>]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/fan_fiction_friday_the_pokemon_story.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/fan_fiction_friday_the_pokemon_story.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Anime</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Nerdery</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Insanity</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Pokemon</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Things that make me drink</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Wretchedness</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 14:01:37 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>Meet Starbuck Nguyen</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object height="340" width="560"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/yLD1oQfjNLc&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" /><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always" /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/yLD1oQfjNLc&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1&amp;" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="340" width="560"></object><br />I don't who this Aussie lass is, because she's apparently got quite the following on YouTube and I very much hope it's because she's genuinely clever and funny and not because she's an attractive 15-year-old Asian girl whose very nerdy and goes to cons and does <i>Battlestar Galactica</i> cosplay and oh god, <i>what hell have I unleashed by posting this here?</i> Look, if you have something awful and depraved to say, please just keep it to yourself -- I'm posting the Pokémon story at 2pm, and I really, really can't handle any more inappropriate sexual behavior right now, okay? Please. <i>Please</i>.<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/meet_starbuck_nguyen.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/meet_starbuck_nguyen.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Nerdery</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Australia</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Battlestar Galactica</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Cons</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Cosplay</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 12:05:03 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>R2D2 Assists Number Twos</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><img alt="star_wars_tissue_holder_wxp.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/star_wars_tissue_holder_wxp.jpg" height="508" width="420" /></span><br />R2D2 has done many things in his storied career. Carried Death Star plans. Slaughtered battle droids. Shot lightsabers out of his head. Served booze. But now, thanks to Japan, he can help keep your anus clean as this toilet paper cozy, which... I don't know. I'm just too dead inside today to feel much of anything. I wish it were because I want to already be on holiday, or because I'm still sleepy, but no. I know what's coming up. The Pokémon story. And my body is trying to desensitize itself so I don't spend the entire weekend crying and cutting myself.<br /><br />...<br /><br />...oh. Order the R2D2 Toilet Paper holder <a href="http://www.ncsx.com/2009/062909/r2d2_roll_tissue.htm">here</a>. (<a href="http://www.galactichunter.com/"><i>Via Galactic Hunter</i></a>)<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/r2d2_assists_number_twos.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/r2d2_assists_number_twos.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Merchandise</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Star Wars</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Toilets</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 11:05:31 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>A Viewmaster Movie. A @#$%ing Viewmaster Movie.</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><img alt="viewmastermovie.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/viewmastermovie.jpg" height="333" width="500" /></span><br />From <a href="http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=56857">Coming Soon</a>:<br /><blockquote><font color="#000000" face="arial" size="2">"Fringe" co-producer/writer Brad Caleb Kane will be writing a <a itxtdid="10333205" target="_blank" href="http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=56857#" style="border-bottom: 0.075em solid darkgreen ! important; font-weight: normal ! important; font-size: 100% ! important; text-decoration: underline ! important; padding-bottom: 1px ! important; color: darkgreen ! important; background-color: transparent ! important; background-image: none; padding-top: 0pt; padding-right: 0pt; padding-left: 0pt;" classname="iAs" class="iAs">movie</a> based on the View-Master toy, which first came on the market in 1939. </font><br /><font color="#000000" face="arial" size="2">
</font><br /><font color="#000000" face="arial" size="2">
He announced on his <a href="http://twitter.com/bradcalebkane" target="_blank">Twitter account</a> that after he's done penning the sci-fi <a itxtdid="10324604" target="_blank" href="http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=56857#" style="border-bottom: 0.075em solid darkgreen ! important; font-weight: normal ! important; font-size: 100% ! important; text-decoration: underline ! important; padding-bottom: 1px ! important; color: darkgreen ! important; background-color: transparent ! important; background-image: none; padding-top: 0pt; padding-right: 0pt; padding-left: 0pt;" classname="iAs" class="iAs">action-adventure</a> <b><a href="http://www.comingsoon.net/films.php?id=42892">Uprising</a></b> for director Wolfgang Petersen and <a itxtdid="10323896" target="_blank" href="http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=56857#" style="border-bottom: 0.075em solid darkgreen ! important; font-weight: normal ! important; font-size: 100% ! important; text-decoration: underline ! important; padding-bottom: 1px ! important; color: darkgreen ! important; background-color: transparent ! important; background-image: none; padding-top: 0pt; padding-right: 0pt; padding-left: 0pt;" classname="iAs" class="iAs">Columbia Pictures</a>, he will take on the project for DreamWorks Pictures.</font><br /><font color="#000000" face="arial" size="2">
</font><br /><font color="#000000" face="arial" size="2">
Kane says Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci ("Fringe," <b>Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen</b>, <b>Star Trek</b>) are behind the film and that it will be "like the old 80's Amblin movies: <a itxtdid="10327398" target="_blank" href="http://www.comingsoon.net/news/movienews.php?id=56857#" style="border-bottom: 0.075em solid darkgreen ! important; font-weight: normal ! important; font-size: 100% ! important; text-decoration: underline ! important; padding-bottom: 1px ! important; color: darkgreen ! important; background-color: transparent ! important; background-image: none; padding-top: 0pt; padding-right: 0pt; padding-left: 0pt;" classname="iAs" class="iAs">Goonies</a>, Young Sherlock... In that vein."</font><br /></blockquote>Oh. My Fucking. God. Now I have always believed in the potential greatest of movies based on '80s franchises, albeit those with cartoons and mythologies more than just toylines. And after <i>Pirates of the Caribbean</i>, I can understand how movies based on board games -- and there are many of them in the works -- could be doable, like Clue being a murder mystery and Battleship being a naval battle flick. But.<br /><br />But the Viewmaster is a fucking hunk of plastic. It's a device to look at slides. There's no rich mythology about the Viewmaster, no potential characters, no nothing. It's like making a movie based on a Lite Brite or a rubber bouncy ball. This is fucking insanity.<br /><br />Also, I think Kurtzman and Orci need to officially be stopped. Yes, they wrote the great <i>Star Trek </i>reboot movie and are responsible for the sharply improved <i>Fringe</i> TV series. But they also wrote both Transformers movie script and are now indirectly involved in this. I don't believe the good they're doing is justifying the evil they're generating. It's not worth it any more.<br />]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/a_viewmaster_movie_a_ing_viewmaster_movie.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/a_viewmaster_movie_a_ing_viewmaster_movie.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Movies</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Toys</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Bad Movies</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Insanity</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Toy Movies</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 09:57:51 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>Cobra Christ, Superstar</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<object data="http://flash.revver.com/player/1.0/player.swf?mediaId=1292667" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" id="revvervideoa17743d6aebf486ece24053f35e1aa23" height="392" width="480"><param name="Movie" value="http://flash.revver.com/player/1.0/player.swf?mediaId=1292667" /><param name="FlashVars" value="allowFullScreen=true" /><param name="AllowFullScreen" value="true" /><param name="AllowScriptAccess" value="always" /><embed type="application/x-shockwave-flash" src="http://flash.revver.com/player/1.0/player.swf?mediaId=1292667" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" allowscriptaccess="always" flashvars="allowFullScreen=true" allowfullscreen="true" height="392" width="480"></object><br />It's one of those times where I have no words; just watch and let the awesomeness wash over you. I can tell you that this thing actually ran in Montreal, Canada, and that at some point this summer the Cobra troupe will be putting on something called <i>Cobra III: Returns of the King... of Kings</i> which just blows my mind. You can see more pics <a href="http://www.cobrathemusical.com/ee.htm">here</a> and you should. You definitely should. (<a href="http://www.greatwhitesnark.com/"><i>Via Great White Snark</i></a>)]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/cobra_christ_superstar.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/cobra_christ_superstar.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Cartoons</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Nerdery</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">G.I. Joe</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Impressive Acts of Nerdery</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Music</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Musicals</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 09:03:53 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
      <item>
         <title>The 10 Awesomest Things Leonard Nimoy Has Done That Have Nothing to Do with Spock</title>
         <description><![CDATA[<!--StartFragment-->

<span class="mt-enclosure mt-enclosure-image" style="display: inline;"><table class="image right" border="0" width="227"><tbody><tr><td><img alt="Leonard Nimoy.jpg" src="http://www.toplessrobot.com/Leonard%20Nimoy.jpg" height="280" width="227" /></td></tr></tbody></table></span><p class="MsoNormal"><i>By Chris Cummins<o:p></o:p></i></p>

<p class="MsoNormal"><i><br /></i></p>

<p class="MsoNormal">Photographer, poet, songbird,
Vulcan, TV salesman, Friend of Bigfoot. Leonard Nimoy is all of these things
and more. Working steadily as an actor, director and writer since the early
1950s, Nimoy has proven himself to be a true Hollywood renaissance man over the
years despite never truly being able to emerge from the shadow of Mr. Spock.
His ambivalent feelings over this matter are discussed at length in his memoirs
<i>I Am Not Spock </i>and <i>I Am Spock</i>, both of which should be required
reading for nerds everywhere (Zachary Quinto may want to check them out as
well). As you are doubtlessly aware, Mr. Nimoy recently emerged from a
self-imposed break from the entertainment industry to take high-profile roles
in J.J. Abrams' <i>Star Trek </i>and <i>Fringe. </i>In honor of Leonard Nimoy's
welcome return to the public eye, let us pay tribute to his greatest
achievements that didn't require the donning of rubber ears.<o:p></o:p></p>

<!--EndFragment-->


 ]]>
         <![CDATA[<a href="http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/the_10_awesomest_things_leonard_nimoy_has_done_tha.php">Continue reading "The 10 Awesomest Things Leonard Nimoy Has Done That Have Nothing to Do with Spock" ></a>]]>
         </description>
         <link>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/the_10_awesomest_things_leonard_nimoy_has_done_tha.php</link>
         <guid>http://www.toplessrobot.com/2009/07/the_10_awesomest_things_leonard_nimoy_has_done_tha.php</guid>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">Daily Lists</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#category">TV</category>
        
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Leonard Nimoy</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Lord of the Rings</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Sega</category>
        
          <category domain="http://www.sixapart.com/ns/types#tag">Star Trek</category>
        
         <pubDate>Fri, 03 Jul 2009 08:03:18 -0500</pubDate>
      </item>
      
   </channel>
</rss>
