Necronomidong ex Mortis, the Dildo of the Dead

Are you a woman who wishes you could fuck Cthulhu or one of the Elder Gods? Are you a man who wishes you could be anally penetrated by an Alien? Or are you just someone who would enjoy a rotting zombie penis? Well, have I got good news for you.


?Necronomicox is ready to meet your infinitely disturbing sexual needs with their line of “horror film inspired” dildos. From left to right, that’s the Xemomorph, the Mythos and the Zombi. They’re also over $150 dollars each, which makes them unspeakably evil on several levels!

Come on, ladies and gentlemen. If you really want to insert something evil in your bodies, the Twilight dildos are far, far cheaper. Thanks to my buddy Jacob for bringing these atrocities to my attention.