Fan Fiction Friday: Goro and Spider-Man in “Goro’s Happy Time”


?Well, I had what was essentially a four-day vacation last weekend, and then only had to work three days this week. Technically, I’ll probably never be more rested and mentally prepared to run an FFF than I am now, at least for the conceivable future. I guess I better make it count for something, right? Today’s story was sent to me in a Word doc from Chase P.; I’m presuming Chase P. is not the author, and was just submitting this story of unknown origin for FFF — but if it is his, then my apologies. Well, not really. If Chase wrote it, he deserves a lot worse than me misrepresenting his work. BUT HE PROBABLY DIDN’T WRITE IT. So… shall we?

Spiderman fell brutally to the floor but Goro was far from finished; grabbing the fallen hero by the leg Goro proceeded to drag Spider man out of the rubble and into the street amidst the panicked and screaming civilians. Goro licked his lips, it had been an enjoyable fight but it had also been far too short, Goro wanted Spiderman in pain he wanted the spider to feel nothing but agony both in mind and soul. Screwing his face into deep concentration Goro rubbed his four hands together in anticipation an idea was beginning to make itself known within his mind an idea that excited Goro. Walking boldly and ignoring the insignificant people surrounding him Goro grabbed a street sign planted within the concrete foundations and with seemly little effort ripped it free with a load audible “CRACK”.

A screaming civilian made the mistake of standing to close to the towering monstrosity that was Goro who with one free hand snatched the innocent woman up holding her aloft.

“Goro must test procedure, you have honor of being first” Goro said quietly

Aaaaaand I think I see where this is going. Let’s just continue this after the jump.

Oh, before we continue: Yes, that is Goro the four-armed evil dude from Mortal Kombat, and no, I have no fucking clue why he’s fighting Spider-Man. I do know why the author started the story after Spider-Man already been beaten, and that’ because he’s not interested in fighting. At all.

The woman desperately tugged at the massive hand that had enveloped her waist but it was ultimately futile as Goro lifted her above the street sign but not before smashing it upon the ground destroying the octagon leaving only the long metal shaft. Slowly and cruelly Goro inserted the pole between the woman’s clothed buttocks and firmly applied pressure to the shaft.

Lady, I know you’re about to have a very bad time, but at least Goro took off the “Stop” part of the stop sign first. Silver lining!

 At first there was resistance the woman’s asshole was stiff and stubborn from underuse, but gradually the inches of the pole began to vanish within the woman’s trembling body. Goro smiled as the woman’s scream’s raised three octaves, blood and ass juice leaked from her stretched anus.

What an erotic fan fiction writer see when he sees a perfectly normal anus: “That anus is stiff and stubborn from underuse.” What normal people see when they see an anus: “That anus looks like it’s being used exactly the appropriate amount. Also, gross, an anus.”

“Yes this is good, full of pain and humiliation but this has no honor, women is weak but man that is spider is strong” Goro said to no one in particular.

HEY HEY HEY — There’s no reason for you to be calling women weak, Goro. You can impale a living woman by sticking a metal pole in her ass without getting all misogynist about it, okay?

Then with a brutal wrench Goro fed the entire length of the pole through the woman’s body silencing her screams as the pole erupted from her face along with frothing shit and blood splattering area around them. Goro extracted the pole from the woman’s wasted body and licked it clean, to Goro the blood and shit stained pole tasted like a bowl of sweet milk.

Here’s how much FFF has ruined me: When I read the above paragraphed, I was of course horrified, but I was more perplexed about why Goro thought it tasted like a bowl of sweet milk instead of, say, a cup. Does Goro drink from a saucer like a kitten? Lolgoro!



Turning and expecting to see the downed hero, Goro was surprised to see Spiderman standing before him bruised and bloody but still conscious.

Goro laughed “Man of the spider still stand you truly are worthy of Goro’s gift”.

I bet he means his penis.

Without further hesitation Goro ripped off his loincloth exposing Spiderman to his thick one meter member, dripping and oozing with his sweet milky man juice.

Called it! Hey — if the woman’s gore taste’s like sweet milk to Goro, does this mean if Goro licked his own “sweet milky man juice” it would taste like a bowl of “frothing shit and blood”? Stands to reason, right?

Spiderman gasped out loud but quickly recovered and charged the 12 foot monster; Goro laughed and swung his massive cock like a club slamming it into Spiderman sending him flying into a solid brick wall.

Okay. Say what you want about this story, but Goro just beat Spider-Man unconscious with his erect penis. That’s pretty great.

As Spiderman fought to stay conscious Goro began to utilize all four of his hands to rapidly masturbate his monster for a cock.

“In Outworld this move, known among out kind as Master Cock Cannon consider it sacred baptism by jizz.”

No they don’t. Goro’s just a perv.

Goro’s cocked bulged as his penis thickened under the immense power building within his balls his semen boiled surging with the full power of the shokan race. Spiderman screamed as Goro’s cock exploded forth with his massive truckload of steaming cum, it shot out like a missile.

Quick, Spidey! He’s a Mortal Kombat fighter! Just keep doing legsweeps! It’s cheap, but you’ll beat him in no time!

“NOOOOO! SPIDERMAN” A little girl screamed as she ran between the massive projected orb of man juice in an attempt to save her hero. The little girls face collided with the boiling projectile, her face melted under scalding heat of Goro’s semen just before her head exploded from the violent transfer of kinetic energy.

Yes, it is sad that Goro just murdered a little girl with his lava-hot semen. However — and I’m not really excusing Goro here — but this girl did just willingly run in front of an 8-foot-tall, four-armed monster who was clearly, vigorously masturbating. The temperature of the semen may have been a surprise, but surely her survival instinct should have kicked in at some point even without that knowledge, telling her, “You, know, maybe I shouldn’t get in the way of that monster’s pee-pee and whatever he’s doing with it.” That’s just kind of Darwinism in action. Really, really gross Darwinism, but still Darwinism.

The girls sacrifice was not totally in vain though as her small frail virgin body dispersed the jizz missile, showering the surrounding area with cum shrapnel which burned like the fourth of July as the surrounding trees burst into flame under such incredible heat. Spiderman was powerless to stop the flaming shower of liquid firecum as it rained upon him melting his spandex suit to his youthful body.

Right, now, TR‘s erotic fan fic-writer-in-residence Dr. Abraxas is either thinking “Firecum! Why didn’t I think of that!” or “Firecum! This asshole totally ripped me off!”

Spiderman’s screams as his suit burned him warmed Goro’s heart but the prospect of Spiderman surviving the baptizing of jizz abet with a little bit of help, made Spiderman valid for the most honorable fatality.

Oh, shut up you big baby. This isn’t any worse than One More Day.

“Spiderman you tenacity make my cock hunger for you soul; I have decided to make you mate, I shall do ritual of binding”

Honestly, as much rest as I’ve had, I don’t think I’m mentally prepared for Goro’s cock to eat Spider-Man’s soul.

Spiderman struggled to move but the intense nerve damaged done by the burning effectively paralyzing him, his breaths came in sheltered gasps as his lungs were wrecked and torn. Goro knew Spiderman had only a few minutes to live but thankfully he knew the correct spells that would deny Spiderman death, for a little while anyway.

I like to imagine at this point Goro is backing away a step, squatting, backing away another step, squatting again, then throwing a light punch…

Ancient chanting filled the air as Goro weaved the spells that would save Spiderman’s life; the process was not a pleasing one. Spiderman stiffened as a sickly green aura surrounded him, the aura acted as if it was alive; the green aura slowly began to lift the crippled Spiderman off the ground spreading him in the air eagle style. The green aura began to slide into Spiderman through every orifice in his body, soaking through the melted fabric starting with Spiderman’s mouth then ears, nose, belly button and finally the seared penis and dried asshole.

First of all, the belly button is not an orifice. Second of all, why specify his asshole as “dried”? Why would you assume that all assholes must be moist and lubricated at all–

…never mind. Let’s just get this over with.

Despite Spiderman’s condition, Peter began to buck wildly and scream as he was deeply penetrated and fucked like a dog by the green aura.
Spiderman felt every hole within his broken body stretch and tear, suddenly Spiderman’s screams fell silent, a liquid chunky stream of feces began to leak from Spiderman’s bleeding anus.

So it’s no longer dry. Great. Thanks for the anal update.

His penis began to grow hard before surging forth a great stream of milky white liquid tainted by tinges of red and green.


Peter slowly began to whimper as he constantly began to shit and ejaculate into the open air, this process lasted a full ten minutes until the green aura had fully submerged within his body. Spiderman fell like a Marinette whose strings had been cut, a mighty splash followed as he fell into a great puddle of his own excrement and cum.

This where Johnny Cage suddenly walks up. “What the hell, Goro? Were you trying to do the one where you turn your opponent into a baby? Because that’s… that is not supposed to happen, man.”

“Good it done, but we shall mate” Goro said smiling before hefting the metal pole and without pause rammed it with impunity into Spiderman’s withered ass.

Now I think you’re just randomly choosing adjectives to describe people’s assholes, dude. Frankly, I don’t think you have any idea what the state of their asshole are supposed to be.

Goro’s aim was slightly off but it did not matter as the metal rod’s hole merged with Spiderman’s ass canal before finally emerging from his mouth. Peter no longer had the energy to scream all he felt was agony yet even though he prayed for death it eluded him still.
Goro raised the pole with Spiderman still attached to it and stared directly into Spiderman’s tortured eyes.

Wait a second… anyone else get the feeling J. Michael Straczynski wrote this? Just me?

“You are good, Spider” Goro said ignoring peter’s desperate whimpering, before slowly licking his face “The spell last many nights I return to Outworld with you, but first a reward”
Goro planted the impaled Spiderman up right on the ground then utilized his four arms’ to grab both Peter’s arms and legs.

“I love you” Goro said before ounce more licking Spiderman then he began to slowly pull Peter’s limps applying steady increases in pressure. Goro grunted and with one finally tug, Peter’s arms and legs tore off in unity leaving splatters of gore and four bleeding stumps.

And now I’m forced to wonder what spell Goro cast that could possibly “last many nights” even after he dismembered Spider-Man. FFF: I hate you.

Spiderman gave one final scream before his own vocal tract tore causing his mouth to erupt in a froth of blood and spittle.

Goro raised his arm and conjured forth a portal to the Outrealm and then he picked up the impaled Spiderman before raising his foot in order to step though the portal.

Goro stopped in mid step, he slowly turned around and walked back to the bloody boiled headless corpse of the little girl.

“May come in Handy” He muttered before slinging the girls corpse over his shoulder and stepping through the portal.


I was in the Boy Scouts for a bit, so I admit a certain satisfaction knowing that Goro likes to keep the corpse of a headless child handy. Yes, it’s hell getting it through airport security, but you know the motto: “Be prepared!”