“This” being the Star Wars porn parody. Call me old-fashioned, but I prefer my pornography to be… arousing? Sexy? Appear to have more than one woman in it? And to all you who sent me this trailer saying it was funny — you’re fucking crazy. It’s not funny. Which I would be fine with — how many people watch porn for the chuckles, really — if, you know, it seemed even slightly erotic. Look, porn industry, the internet has mined all the humor out of A New Hope already. You’re not going to think of anything we haven’t already. So stop worrying about the jokes, and start worrying about how you can cram more women into the movie.
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.