?? Cowboys & Aliens
The head of Universal, Ron Meyer, called this movie — the major summer movie his own studio made — “mediocre.” At this point the only reason I’m bothering to put it on my Netflix queue is Olivia Wilde.
? The Simpsons: The Fourteenth Season
Kang is on the cover. Or maybe it’s Kodos. Honestly, that’s all I have to say about this.
? Mystery Science Theater 3000 Vol. XXII
Containing Mighty Jack, Time of the Apes, The Violent Years and The Brute Man. See my review below.
? The Sarah Jane Adventures: The Complete Fourth Season
Not the final season, just the next to last. The Eleventh Doctor stops by for an episode, I believe.
? Transformers: Prime – Darkness Rising
The five-episode miniseries premiere thingie from this latest Transformers cartoon. The Rock voices Cliffjumper. He dies really quickly. That’s all I got.
? Captain Power: The Complete Series
All 22 episodes plus the apparently-never-before-aired-in-the-U.S. TV movie. All I want to know is if the toys still work with the DVD. That would be amazing.
? Skeleton Warriors: The Complete Series
I have no memories about this cartoon, but I’m sure some of you guys have waiting for this for a while, so congrats.
? Santa Claus
The crazy-ass Mexican Santa Claus movie from MST3K fame, where Santa Claus lives in the clouds with Merlin and hundreds of children from around the world, and he has a satellite dish with an ear on it, and there’s the most fucking terrifying robot reindeer you will ever see, and oh, he also fights the devil. It’s on Blu-ray now. My mind: blown.
? Super Heroine 3D
Like those comic book porn parodies but tired of all that plot? Here’s an XXX DVD (link NSFW, obviously) which is apparently just straight sex in an empty room with a terrible Catwoman, a pretty good Supergirl, and a rather accurate Emma Frost and Zatanna (one at a time, sorry). I mention it solely because I imagine many people need more Emma Frost pornography in their lives.