Comics, Movies

Sexy Rocket in the Guardians of the Galaxy Porn Is Still Confusing My Impulses

0

gnardians_sexy_rocket.jpg

Rocket Raccoon. With boobs. And a sex toy that is, in fact, the reincarnation of Baby Groot (or “Groin,” as he’s called in this). Played by Ninja Turtle fangirl April O’Neil.

I feel like Furry fetishists will be disappointed with the reveal of smooth skin, and everyone else will just be…I dunno…facepalming? But the real news here is that yes, Gnardians of the Galaxy Part 1 is now online.

io9 has an exclusive on the trailer – damn them! – which isn’t completely safe for work when it comes to language, but is impressive in how well the “actors not primarily known for their acting” impersonate the real thing.

About Author

Luke Y. Thompson has been writing professionally about movies and pop-culture since 1999, and has also been an actor in some extremely cheap culty and horror movies you will probably never hear much about (he is nonetheless mostly proud of them, as he met his wife on one). As editor of The Robot's Voice since 2012, he can take the blame for the majority of the site's content, all of which he creates because he loves you very, very much. (Although he loves nachos more. Sorry.) Prior to TRV, Luke wrote for publications that include the New Times LA, Los Angeles CityBeat, E! Online, OC Weekly, Geekweek, GeekChicDaily, The L.A. Times, The Village Voice, LA Weekly, and Nerdist