By Rob Bricken in
Tech
Wednesday, Jan. 27 2010 @ 1:55PM
What? Did you say you wanted another terrifying fake baby? You got it!
Yotaro here isn't a traditional horrifying robot baby because 1) it's stuck in a crib (although it has motorized nubs to simulate movement under it's blanket [and goddamn if that's not the weirdest fucking sentence I've ever written]) plus it's more than 50% head. But that's not even close to the only reason why Yotaro wll haunt your nightmares tonight, as it also:
• Can be cheered with a rattle
• He can be petted, which seems very wrong
• Can cry, actually producing tears and leaking fluid from his nose
• Gets paler in areas where pressed, which cannot possibly have any useful purpose, and if anything will teach people to press babies in the face
JAPAN, STOP MAKING FAKE BABIES. GODDAMMIT, I SWEAR YOU'RE TRYING TO DESTROY THE HUMAN RACE ON PURPOSE. (Via Japan Probe)
Yotaro here isn't a traditional horrifying robot baby because 1) it's stuck in a crib (although it has motorized nubs to simulate movement under it's blanket [and goddamn if that's not the weirdest fucking sentence I've ever written]) plus it's more than 50% head. But that's not even close to the only reason why Yotaro wll haunt your nightmares tonight, as it also:
• Can be cheered with a rattle
• He can be petted, which seems very wrong
• Can cry, actually producing tears and leaking fluid from his nose
• Gets paler in areas where pressed, which cannot possibly have any useful purpose, and if anything will teach people to press babies in the face
JAPAN, STOP MAKING FAKE BABIES. GODDAMMIT, I SWEAR YOU'RE TRYING TO DESTROY THE HUMAN RACE ON PURPOSE. (Via Japan Probe)
24 comments
Comments
Kaoy said:
I can think of a lot of reasons for certain things that others fail to see any use in. This though? Not really.
Only possible use I can think of would be a surrogate to replace a child that died or miscarried for grieving parents, but that isn't really helpful. In fact, that is extremely unhealthy.
Why does this exist? What purpose is it supposed to have? Who would want this?
MattK said:
This looks like the punchline to the Futurama episode where Fry makes out with Lucy Liu-bot.
savagemouse said:
It really seems like it would be simpler to have an actual baby than this monstrosity. At least with a real baby the novelty wears off a little slower.
savagemouse replied to savagemouse:
Plus a real baby eventually grows up into something you can force to do your dishes and mow the grass.
Faceman said:
And people wonder why the birth rate in Japan is declining.
Stephens said:
Looks kinda like one of those Glow Worm (?) plush toys from the 80s. If I recall, they didn't do anything important either.
Rikari said:
Baby? That thing is a baby?!
Suz said:
Huh, Gibson had these (from Japan and all) in 'All Tomorrow's Parties' and I thought "well that's just silly".
That'll learn me.
rasmodeus said:
Fake babies? You mean like all the fake babies that little girls have, that look realistic and wear diapers etc.? Because those have been around a long time, and humanity is still around (for weal or woe.)
dacshiggy said:
We have to find who created that thing and surround his house with pitchforks and torches post haste. I will not have another restful night sleep until his monster is destroyed and he has paid for his crimes against humanity.
Drappelfed said:
AHHHHHHH! IT'S A FUCKING GIANT GLOW WORM!!! KILL IT! KILL IT!
Ungh... I'm better. What purpose can this glowing nightmare serve? Japan - You've officially freaked me out.
Monkey said:
I think you all fail to realise just how lonely the Japanese people are. This is an inexpensice opportunity for them to fill that void in their hearts that only interactions with other living human beings or nightmare robot babies can fill. Its really very sad.
Lokifire said:
Dammit, Japan, stop giving me reasons to not love you anymore. Old Cowboy Bebop episodes can only sustain my fondness for you for so long.
Neuronin said:
You, too, can torture a robot baby until it reaches the part of it's program where it "falls asleep".
Bunny Fu said:
Euh! That's creepy! Wouldn't it be more honest to have a robot baby that's intentionally meant to discourages having babies? A robot baby that would make lots of horrible disgusting noises, spit up and crap. Well, fake robot crap, at least.
I'm surprised the Japanese haven't made a robot baby that grows inside to discourage teen skywalking. Gah! that sounds like a FFF....
Rachel said:
I'm wondering how "glows like a disturbing night-light from Satan" didn't get added to that list.
Boredlizzie said:
Does this mean Roxxxy is a single mother? Oh dear, the scandal! Also, "motorized nubs"? Ew.
Snoodle said:
I'd forgotten this existed. Why did you have to remind me?? Why?
RDJ134 said:
So thats where the Hutts come from.
mikhel replied to RDJ134:
RDJ134,
While reading 'The Paradise Snare' today (it's a Star Wars book, Han Solo Trilogy Book One), Han sees a Hutt for the first time in many years. I only mention that because I actually wondered, at that moment in the book, where Hutts came from, originally.
You have satiated my curiosity, sir. Thank you.
TNez said:
Peeling back that baby blanket escalated this from mildly insane and ridiculous to full out KILL IT KILL IT WITH FIRE
rickicker said:
BEGONE, SPAWN OF SATAAAAAAAANNNNN!!!
-tosses holy water at babybot-
Asat said:
There's only one thing wrong with the Takahashis' new robot.
It's alive.
