Alas, this stunningly accurate description of Zack Snyder's Sucker Punch movie -- which has a new trailer above -- isn't mine, but was coined by Tom Brazelton on Twitter. It's basically 300 + John Woo + a women-behind-bars flick, but also with dragons, robots, and a giant samurai demon thing wielding a giant gatling gun. I'm on the internet, and admittedly like all of those things, especially the giant samurai demon thing wielding a giant gatling gun, as it turns out. And while you might think that co-star Vanessa Hudgens, the chick from the High School Musical movies, might be a thing the internet doesn't like, I believe her leaked nude cellphone pics prove otherwise.
Tags: Sucker Punch, Zack Snyder
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Ugh. I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.
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I can actually hear the ring-ring-ring as Scott Glenn phones in his lines. I mean, "find a map" isn't great dialogue, but still...
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Coyote Ugly meets the Matrix? Suck
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Out of all the comments saying the same thing, I'll pick you as being the troll. If not: NO SHIT SHERLOCK. I guess that's all.
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That musical-chick to the right sure does, but Jamie Chung is all kinds of proper hot.
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I was lucky enough to see a screening of Sucker Punch not too long ago. I don't think I'm allowed to say too much (they made me sign a paper) but it was freaking awesome. GO SEE IT.
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I'm reminded of Kevin Smith's story about his plan for a Superman movie. The producer demanded that a giant mechanical spider be included for superman to fight. Smith said no, and that it'd go against the entire theme of his screenplay and not fit at all - such a concession would be absurd. Smith later saw that the producer was one of the ones in charge of "Wild Wild West". This looks like a dumping ground for effects that could've individually been made for good movies. But whatever...
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How did Zack Snyder manage to get an entire group of women who can't act their way out of a paper bag. This looks to be dumber than Charlie's Angels. Quite an achievement.
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It's funny. I love Led Zepplin and Silversun Pickups, but neither song actually fits the tone of the trailer. Poor choices of great music.
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The internet also likes disturbing fanfiction, "sexy" animals, and LOLOMGWTF language. An actual Things The Internet Likes: The Movie would be pretty cool, though it would probably be a very solid R or PG-13 with a lot of bleeping and black ba--what's that? What's a Sucker Punch?
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Yeah, which is a really healthy message. Hah maybe this is secretly an advertisement for MMORPGs?
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Hurray for more blue and orange? To me this just looks really stupid and not in a fun way. It seems there's only so many CGI explosions and school uniformed action girls one can view in their life before it all becomes one long Yawnorama.
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So this is "Brazil" with tits and no societal subtext?
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Hmm, the movie looks visually cool, but other than that, I'm not really getting anything from this. I'll save my money for Captain America beefcake.
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Dude, they took all the epic stuff ever conceived and dumped it in a lacking movie.
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Exaaactly.
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So everyone else realizes this whole thing is her still being in the asylum, right? Like, none of that stuff is really happening, it's all in her head, and she's finally set free by basically becoming a vegetable and retreating into her own mind? Because I talked to a guy that totally didn't get that out of these trailers.
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I still have no idea what this movie is about.
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"We're Out of Ideas, but You Like Tits, right?" The Movie...
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It's like Inglorious bastards slept with Bayonetta and this is the result.... Ooh look Carla Bruni's on the simpsons.
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Vannessa Hudgens has leaked nudie pics? I didn't know? What screwed up world do we live in? BTW am I the only one who feels like a pedo for wanting to do inappropriate things to her?
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gritty Calvin & Hobbes reboot. i can't wait.
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It's all a hallucination, and they'renot really going to escape the asylum. The audiencegets sucker-punched.
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You forgot one thing: Led Zeppelin. Nuff said.
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I have absolutely no idea what is going on but I like everything in that trailer, so I guess it doesn't matter!
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What the fuck?
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Godzilla pure motherfuckin' fillah
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Looks fun, in a "Big Trouble meets Robotech in the 300 universe" sort of way.
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That's some bad grammar
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Where's the pirates?
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So.... is there a plot? Or just scenes of rampant fetish fuel strung together for 90 minutes?
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I'm gonna watch the shit out of this! I think my inner 14 year old had a heart attack and orgasm simultaneously after seeing the trailer.
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I kinda wanted to dislike this movie, but I have to admit that trailer was mind blowing.... Pretty interested in this now.
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"it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing." Seriously, start making some damn movies with damn puppets. Practical effects make movies like cult classics, instead of disposable cut-scenes.
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Or Mike Haggar piledriving a Shark.
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Judging from all the material I've seen that is exactly what is going on. The fantasy they are living in their head helps them escape the loony bin in real life. I think the real twist would be if it was all real.
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This looks like fun, because sometimes I just want my base instincts to be pandered to. And it does look like the same kind of "10 year old boy playing with his toys" script that 300 was...hopefully this movie doesn't get blown out of proportion into some sort of weird meathead wet dream the same way 300 did.
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The trailer looks interesting. Don't be surprised if the girls were actually in straight-jackets the whole time and all that shit was in their drugged out minds. It would be a real "sucker punch" to the audience if that was true, amirite? LoL
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I'm waiting for the inevitable "Snookie Punch" parody.
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If there is a lesbian shower scene is this movie I'll attend every session of it at my local cinema.
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Does the internet like former Real World cast members too?
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They defeated the zombie 3rd reich and the cyborg uprising. They slayed the Dragon and demon Samurai but nothing prepared them for the ultimate battle against....RAPE-FACE WOODY!
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ah yes...those cellphone pics reminded the world about the joys of fapping to your high school yearbook...
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is it me, or do the girls in the preview frame look like knockoffs of the girls from Jersey Shore?
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This movie is going to be one long fap for me.
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You know, "Things The Internet Likes: The Movie" was my exact thought after seeing the first trailer. And I don't think that's a good thing.
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One Flew Over Kill Bill's Dungeons and Dragons also Samurai. It looks kind of okay. I prefer my girls-in-prison-movies to have Pam Greer in them but I guess one can't have everything. Seems like a pretty elaborate setup for a movie about girls playing pretend though. Larping.
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Or, "Things I used to draw in my Pee-Chee folder instead of doing my homework". Even has the mighty Zep to listen to. Fuckin' A Bubba!
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cant wait to see this!!!!
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Shouldn't there be a shot of Batman attacking a shark with a lightsaber in there too?
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I tried to be interested, I really tried. But I just can't care or like these trailers. Oh well, at least I made the effort.
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I love Silversun Pickups, but that song does NOT match the feel of the movie or trailer. :( I'm with Rob, though - giant, gatling gun wielding samurai is about the best thing ever.
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Ah buuuuuuh. Barnum poonum poochawee? Baggage baby bordul. Bordul. Bordul.
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NEW SUCKER PUNCH TRAILER!!! NEW SUCKER PUNCH TRAILER!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!!! AAAAAAAAAHHH!!! I'M SO EXCITED!!!
TotalComments: 54
