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I acknowledge that this is sort of an impossible list, seeing as there is so much Dwarf to choose from, and I await the inevitable drubbing I am sure to get in the comments for the scenes I leave out. However, I feel like its pretty safe to say these scenes sum up both the show and each character well. Consider this an ultra-concentrated dose of Dwarf, all the choice cuts, completely free of smeg. Well, maybe not. There's quite a lot of smeg here, actually.
LISTER:
5) Space Mumps, "Justice"
Lister's scuzziness is his chief characteristic, and even though he didn't have any control over contracting space mumps, the image of him at the 8:52 mark smiling while covered in pus and blood sums him up pretty well. I hope you aren't eating Trix yogurt or anything.
4) The Vindaloovian People Despise All Humans!, "Gunmen of the Apocalypse"
Lister is quite resourceful when it comes down to the wire, as he demonstrates here. Asked to prove that there are no humans onboard Starbug, he improvises by acting like a bored 8-year-old with a video camera.
3) Unrumble!, "Backwards"
On a planet where time runs in reverse, Lister suddenly realizes why the bar he is in is such a mess, and proceeds to take part in the greatest unfight of his life.
2) Lister Eats Dog Food, "Marooned"
Stranded on a barren ice moon, Lister finally starts to run out of options. After burning Rimmer's books, Dave gets pushed to desperate measures. I know it's not really dog food, but it's understandable to think otherwise based on that reaction. The line after it is also a classic.
1) The Polymorph Attacks, "Polymorph"
I know we've posted this clip before, but it's not only one of the funniest moments of Lister's, it's one of the best of the entire show. For those who haven't seen it, know that this comes just as the evil shape-shifting Polymorph has invaded the ship. It seeks to feed on the emotions of the crew, and sets its sight on Lister. Chaos, as they say, ensues.
HOLLY:
5) Dog's Milk, "Kryten"
They say that British humor comes from treating the extraordinary as ordinary and that's certainly true of this scene, in which Holly is alarmingly calm about some pretty distressing information.
4) Holly Becomes a Genius, "White Hole"
Hattie Hayridge did a great job following in Norman Lovett's footsteps, and it's a shame the writers there wasn't more for her to do. In "White Hole", her most prominent episode, she regains her genius-level intelligence only to be stuck with the endlessly irritating Talkie Toaster.
3) The NORWEB Federation, "Balance of Power"
The first season was far bleaker than the show would be come, and many of the jokes emphasized the loneliness of the Dwarf crew. The brilliance of this scene is in how simultaneously funny and depressing it is. There really is no one out there, at least not yet...
2) The White Cable, "Queeg"
An erratic Holly attempts to help Lister sort out a power problem. Of all the many things Holly does know, his inner workings do not appear to be one of them.
1) "Everybody's Dead, Dave," "The End"
Holly is kind of the most instrumental character in the show. It is he, after all, who brings Lister out of stasis 3 million years after the drive plate accident and chooses Rimmer as a hologram for Lister, much to Lister's annoyance. This scene at the end of "The End," the show's first episode, is not only one of its most important moments but allows us the first glimpse of what Holly's relationship with Lister will be, particularly in that great throwaway line.
Rimmer, Kryten and the Cat's best moments are on the next page.
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