She-Ra's Bust Will Make Your Rocks Explode

Monday, December 15, 2014 at 10:00 am

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What? I'm just literally describing the product - a high-end, 9-inch bust of He-Man's sister atop the standard Masters of the Universe logo's exploding meteorites. If you have issues staring at She-Ra's bust, or wishing it were just her on the version you order and you could get your rocks off, that's your problem.

They should make one of her horse as a companion piece. Though I fear that shortly thereafter, somebody would break swift wind.

Weekstarter: Mark Hamill's Balls, Vaginal Phone Charging and Sriracha Beer

Monday, December 15, 2014 at 6:00 am

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DC's doing a bunch of comic-book covers based on classic movie posters...and 20 other stories you might have missed this weekend. Compiled with the help of Kyle LeClair, here are some of the best reader submissions from the weekend open thread. This week's tipsters include SlyDante777, NebulaJack, Gallen_Dugall, troi, Rx79immigrant84, Timley Flower-Hermit

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Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron and More Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens Character Names Revealed

Thursday, December 11, 2014 at 12:58 pm

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Entertainment Weekly has revealed a few, along with some cryptic hints about what each character might be doing, and where in the story each trailer scene may take place. Vague minor spoilers may be involved - we now know that the Sith with the crossguard lightsaber is male, and not named "Darth," for example.

I should note that nothing here sticks out as badly as Dooku, Elan Sleazebaggano or Dexter Jettster. You have to have the balls of George Lucas to get that silly with it.

HOWEVER: "Poe Dameron" is just one letter different from "Cameron Poe" - who is Nicolas Cage's character in Con Air!

Geek Apparel of the Week: Jack Burton's Big Trouble in Little China Tank Top

Thursday, December 4, 2014 at 10:32 am

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It's licensed! It's super-limited!

If you want this, take your best shot, pal...immediately.

Super Terrific Japanese Thing: Hello Kitty Meets Leatherface

Tuesday, November 25, 2014 at 3:30 pm

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This moisturizing mask that looks like Hello Kitty is undoubtedly supposed to be cute...and almost certainly designed by somebody who never saw a Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie in their lives. These don't make you look like an adorable kitty-cat - they make you look like you found a giant anthropomorphic cat (or not-cat, whatever), killed and ate it, maybe molesting the corpse first, and are now wearing its flayed face on top of your own as a trophy.

Am I wrong? Aside from morally, I mean?

h/t troi

TR Holiday Gift Guide: 7 Types of Gamers and How to Shop for Them

Monday, November 24, 2014 at 10:00 am

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Much like how David said it's hard to ask for RPG-related gifts this Christmas, I find myself saying the same thing for video game-related gifts...albeit for different reasons. The main two I can think of are that the most notable triple-A games we look forward to keep getting delayed until the following year (lookin' at you, Evolve), and it feels like we keep getting a smaller quantity of truly notable triple-A games each year. And it probably doesn't help that I've reached an age where I can pretty much just afford to purchase my own retail games instead of having to ask for them as gifts.

It probably doesn't help that there also seem to be way too many Scrooges in the gaming world these days, and by "Scrooges", I pretty much mean "Internet commenters". Everyone just seems so damn cynical when it comes to gaming these days, and not just because of recent events that shall go unnamed. No, everyone just seems more critical of modern gaming than ever, seeing the gaming world as being full of nothing but DLC, microtransactions, jerkhole players, overhyped titles, and a new gaming generation creating a new round of arguments from fanboys of all sides.

Poor, misguided folks. They miss the whole point.

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TR Holiday Gift Guide: 10 Awesome RPG-Related Gifts

Friday, November 21, 2014 at 6:00 am

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Solarbotics
Happy Nerdy Holidays

It's hard to ask for RPG gifts for Christmas. The social stigma is fading year by year, so I no longer fear my parents calling an exorcist over my wish list, but there's still a maze of editions, similar-sounding games and supplements to ask people to dig through. This is in addition to the fact that RPGs still tend to be a little bit hard to find; arguably harder to find now than they were fifteen or so years ago before Barnes & Noble and Borders replaced so many independent booksellers...before closing most of their own locations..

People only have so much spare time, and playing more than one or two systems at once is pretty difficult; even if someone played two different games every week they would be playing at most 8-10 different games in a month, which is only a tiny portion of the massive amount of games available these days. Especially with Kickstarter helping to launch more RPGs than ever and many companies releasing their back catalogs through DrivethruRPG. The point being that it can be harder to find the right RPG for someone than finding a good costume in the New 52.

With all of that said, the list that follows tries to work around these challenges by providing ten system-neutral gifts for the RPG fan in your life. Even if that person is you. I don't judge. Even if I did judge, I probably wouldn't judge this time since I've already bought a lot of these things. They're pretty awesome.


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It's About Time: Melting Face Toht Candle Finally Exists

Wednesday, November 19, 2014 at 4:01 pm

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Firebox

First off: Yes, yes, yes. The most obvious (yet arguably tasteless) Raiders of the Lost Ark tie-in idea since the Indiana Jones hat is actually available for sale a mere 34 years late.

However: the execution could be better, no? Wouldn't a core of red wax inside make the melting gloriously messier? And doesn't Toht look a bit like he's laughing rather than screaming? Maybe a metal skull underneath all of that?

I've collected enough Jakks WWE figures to know that collectors will take anything...but own enough of the subsequent Mattels to know that maybe we deserve better. Good first step, though.

via Bloody Disgusting.

For $150, Walk Your Dog on an Alien Facehugger Leash

Tuesday, November 18, 2014 at 5:00 pm

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Methinks this facehugger got confused. Maybe it saw The Tingler and figured it was supposed to grab the back of an animal?

Also, that isn't a real dog. And it's not included in the hefty price tag.


via Bloody-Disgusting


"Nic Cage Raking Leaves on a Brisk October Afternoon" Is the Fragrance Oil for You

Monday, November 17, 2014 at 1:29 pm

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Bear in mind that I'm assuming you're awesome. If you aren't, there's always Mitch McConnell bourbon summit merchandise to look forward to. And while I was hoping it would smell like honey combined with the taste of burning stingers shoved down your throat, this sounds more appealing:

Leaves. Crisp fall air. Deciduous woods. A black leather jacket, well-loved. Maybe the one he wore in Ghost Rider, because there's also some Egyptian Amber in there reminiscent of some of his more, erm, peculiar character acting habits. A light musk, and just a hint of patchouli and men's aftershave. I might have added a smudge of vanilla bean, but you'd never know it >_> Definitely unisex-leaning-masculine
Here's what I think I love most about the scent, though: its name. Because it implies that Cage is badass enough to use a rake, and not one of those noisy, obnoxious, gas-guzzling leaf-blowers that every jackass in L.A. either owns or hires someone to bring.

h/t Amy Nicholson