SOTA sent me some pictures of its new Sagat Street Fighter II statue, it's 12-inches tall and $120 and due in September and god help me, I can't stop STARING AT HIS MAGNIFICENT ASS
Ladies and gentlemen, and I just found my perfect geek shirt. It's stylish. It's simple. It directly references an old toyline/cartoon, without spelling it out so people know you're a nerd. It is, in a word, perfection.
May I present you with the Evil Robot shirt? If you don't recognize this little design, then go away and let me talk to my fellow Masters of the Universe nerds. Yea, my brothers, this is indeed the sticker from Faker's chest, the one hidden under his orange chestplate. I simply cannot stand how awesome this is. The best part is you can wear it, and no one will ever know that you're an evil robot (although having blue skin might raise some concern). Order it here from the geniuses at The Super Designs.
I was debating whether to mention the new Hello Kitty fashion line for France's Victoria Couture (where a tank top will set you back $300) or the Hello Kitty car accessories, but then I saw this:
All right, I give up. There is now officially no Hello Kitty product you can surprise me with. (Via Japundit)
All right, film geeks, it's time to represent. You should know what this is—the flag representing a certain band of seven samurai from a certain famous Akira Kurosawa film (you get no credit if you've just figured it out); the triangle represents a drunken Toshiro Mifune, as per usual. As with the best geek shirts, only your fellow film nerds will know what you're representin'. At $20, it's a hell of a lot cheaper than hiring someone to defend your village from bandits—buy it here.
HOLY SHIT. Don't read this. Just watch the video of Nikko's beyond incredible R2-D2 Digital A/V Projector, then cry because it's so beautiful, then try to figure out a way to save up $3000 so you can buy it here. I imagine I'll be crying until I can convince someone to let be borrow their credit card.
Please don't confuse this with the surreal and hyper-annoying anime Super Milk-chan. Funawari Milk-chan is a series of plush character who, as you might have noticed, are all breasts. They have nipples at the top of their heads. They're soft and adorable, just like regular breasts. As Japan Sugoi says, each breast has its own distinct personality:
Funwari Milk-chan is easygoing, Milk-san is a celebrity entertainer, Ganguro Milk-chan is a gyaru, Peach Milk-chan is a fashion follower and Milko-chan is baby genius.
Let me repeat that, in case you missed. JAPAN HAS MADE A PLUSH BREAST THAT IS ALSO A CELEBRITY ENTERTAINER. Each plush breast costs about $10, and you can see their site here. If I was a chick, I'd definitely buy one of these, then hit Mardi Gras or those sleazy clubs where guys scream "Show me your tits!" Then I'd whip one of these bad boys out. In related news, I'd be a very odd girl.
Sorry to switch the weekly geek apparel up on you, but these things were just too grand not post. Every wanted to wear something incredibly nerdy, but not have women shrink from you in repulsion because you're wearing an armpit-stained Punisher skull t-shirt? Ever wanted to own something wearable that was as classy as it was nerdy? Cufflinks.com (also—holy shit, there's a Cufflinks.com) offers these sterling silver, uh...cufflinks, featuring the Wii-mote and the nunchuk. They do cost a substantial $150, but when you read the text on the ordering page...
For those times that you are away from your beloved gaming system, at least you can pretend to pretend to be fighting your evil nemesis, Gargamel.
...you know they need the money for more drugs. (Via the intriguingly named Tasty Booze)
Suffice it to say, this kawaii cushion is supposed to tighten your ass just by sitting on it. There don't appear to be any massagers or electroshocks or liposuctioning tubes inside the cushion, so how it increases ass beauty is a mystery to me. As is the hole in the middle, which disturbs me to no end. Feel free to order it here and give me the full report. (Via TokyoMango)
By Jackson Alpern
It’s Passover time, the favorite Jewish holiday of people who like to eat a lot. Which is to say, all Jews. If you’ve seen The 10 Commandments you know the basic story: Jews are slaves to the Egyptians. Moses liberates the Jews. Jews get lost and wander the desert for 40 years, which is an awful long time to wander anything, never mind a desert. Now, if you want your children to share in the joy of Passover, what kind of toys could you buy them? If you guessed a plush Moses or a 10 Commandments jigsaw puzzle, those are very reasonable assumptions. But, at least going by the Passover edition of the catalogue “The Source for Everything Jewish,” (which really is, by the way), the hot subject for Passover toys and candy is not Moses. It’s the 10 Plagues.
Yes, those 10 plagues. The ones that started with the Egyptians’ rivers turning to blood and ended with their first-born children being systematically wiped out. Not to take the lord’s name in vain or anything, but WTF? In the interest of public service, I’ve decided to run down the five weirdest, creepiest, most disturbing plague tchotchkes in “The Source of Everything Jewish” catalogue. So in case you’re in the market for chocolate shaped like a diseased cow or a plush chunk of fiery hail, you know where to look. Warning: There will be blood. And also locusts and frogs.
I'm not sure I've ever seen a shirt as simultaneously geeky and cool as these Technics shirts, featuring DJ-ing versions of Marvel's greatest superheros. There's honestly nothing I can say that will make these any cooler (me telling you that they're $50 certainly doesn't count), so I'm just going to tell you to head over to DMC to look at them all, including shirts of Spider-man, Hulk (so awesome), Black Panther, Silver Surfer (also so awesome), and more. (Via Gizmodo)
More importantly, would you buy a statue of a cartoon of a magic lesbian? Sideshow Toy and Electric Tiki hope the answer is yes, because they plan on releasing this "Tooned Up" Willow statue from Buffy the Vampire Slayer this fall. Willow is 10-inches tall and will run $90 when she's released; for those of you keeping track at home, Willow is the second in the Tooned-Up Buffy line after Buffy herself (assumably Angel, Spike or Xander will follow). You can pre-order her here. (Via Action-Figure)
DC Direct just sent out it's monthly toy and merchandise solicits, and it's not exactly mind-blowing. The action-figures we've pretty much all seen before, except for a 12-inch Black Canary (toys with fishnet stockings make me uncomfortable, so I'm not showing it), and a 12-inch Spirit figure from Frank Miller's upcoming movie (so it's just a dude in an all-black suit). But I'm most excited by this replica of the 1966 Batmobile, which was always Batman's sweetest ride; this thing is hand-sculpted and all the lights actually work, so it's worth saving up $250 before this thing comes out in December.
The one really exciting action figure for you nerds is likely this dude:
He's the deluxe figure in DC Direct's World of Warcraft Series 3 line, and he's a "Tauren Hunter" by the name of Brave Highmountain, which makes me giggle and throw up in my mouth at the same time.
Oh, last but not least, DC revealed two more of the Japanese, Koto-made DC statues, including a Dark Knight movie Batman and Supergirl in her popular "teen slut" outfit. Check 'em out here.
There's nothing particularly stylish about this electronic T-shirt. I mean, you're not going to fool anyone into thinking you're cool by wearing it; it's essentially a light-up beacon proclaiming you're nerdery. And yet, it's still kind of awesome. If the Decepticon logo isn't your bag, there's a similar Autobot logo one, natch. The shirts do require two AAA batteries and about $40, unfortunately. But for those longing for a way to shine their Transformers love to world, I imagine money is no object.
When I saw the Helly Kitty car, the Hello Kitty waffle maker, the Hello Kitty PC, the Hello Kitty vibrator and the Hello Kitty tarot cards, I thought I'd seen it all.
Clearly, I was wrong. Head over to JapanSugoi to see a short video of another Hello Kitty tombstone, adorned with a soccer ball, for Hello Kitty-loving soccer players. Well, the dead ones, at least.
I think this Star Trek Enterprise bottle opener is pretty sweet, although I fully admit that's because I'm rather partial to bottles and the delicious booze they often hold inside. But I have to think it's kind of telling that Trek is getting an exciting new bottle opener at same time Star Wars is touting a massive, multi-platform video game release. Anyways, you can purchase it here, if you don't mind the British price and international shipping. (Via Nerd Approved)
A dorky T-shirt that makes a terrible, nerdy joke and shows self-loathing? This might just become the official Topless Robot tee. This TorsoPants shirt—which can be ordered here in a variety of styles and colors—is just one of many surreal possibilities available, of which I wholly approve (next favorite: "Let's Fight Some Ballerinas").
Are you a Star Wars fan with more money than you know what to do with? (Then how 'bout helping out your old pal Bricken, Mr. Moneybags? Some of us have student loans, you know.) Well, if golf isn't your bag, then why not blow five-plus grand on your own droid? Sideshow Collectibles is offered two life-size statues of sci-fi's favorite gay couple, C-3PO and R2-D2, for about $6000 and $5500 respectively. Both statues have light-up effects (3PO's eyes, R2's...uh...lights) and have a few lines of dialogue/beeps as appropriate. I'm told they both also smell like the British men who sweated inside the suits as well, for added authenticity.
It's been 30 years since aliens from space invaded Earth, and conquered the planet with their incredible battle plan of speeding up as they descended. Now, Taito is celebrating our alien overlords with these two fine home goods.
The pillows will set you back $30 each, while the towels ar $20; both are available from Shopncsx.com. (Via A Geek Spot)
Michael McWhertor is one of the awesome writers at the always awesome Kotaku, so I don't think it's fair for him to be able to open a similarly awesome video gaming clothes shop. But he did, called Meat Bun, and his shirts are pure gaming nerd joy. There's one for Typing of the Dead, Spy Hunter, a celebration of game creators and more, but my favorite is "Fight Night":
Oh yes, it's Vega versus Balrog; the extra touches like Bison's all-girl squad appearing as "The Dolls" are just icing on the cake. The shirt is $30, and can (and should) be ordered here.
I'm trying to imagine the part of the Venn Diagram where people who love Star Wars and people who golf meet, and I have to think the section is pretty small. But that's not stopping some company in Japan from making these preposterously awesome Star Wars golf bags (in both Stormtrooper and Darth Vader versions), due to be released next month for a mere $500, while golf club covers will be sold separately. (Via Star Wars.com)
I had an unspoken rule with myself not to feature any faux-distressed, fake-'80s T-shirts in "Geek Apparel of the Week," but damn if this hasn't broken past my emotional defenses:
I approve of an '80s cartoon shirt that doesn't explicitly mention what show it's from, and I always approve of Soundwave. The shirt is $22, and available here at 80stees.com. The real question is: Can you wear this shirt and be as cool as 80stees' shirt model?
Frankly, no. You cannot.
You need absolutely no context from me to enjoy the insanity of the above video, which I absolutely demand you watch all four and a half minutes of. Seriously.
Fine. What you're watching is a performance by the Little Pro Jammer orchestra, a series of Japanese mini-robot-toys that sync up to "play" (meaning move around to) synthesized music tunes. The newest addition to the line-up is the late, legendary enka singer Misora Hibari, who's leading the boys in a rousing rendition of...I have absolutely no idea. But I'm absolutely entranced. (Via Trends in Japan)
By Jason Arango
There are some things that scream out "I'm a huge douchebag!" in a way that makes you stop, take in what you've just witnessed, and then give a silent nod of confirmation that "yes, that is one giant douchebag." These are ten items so intrinsically douchey they could take even the most dignified gentleman and make him look like a raging jackass.
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Here's yet another toy I saw at the New York Toy Fair that stunned me with its awesomeness. Diamond Select's is somewhere in the happy area between replica and toy; it looks just like the original Trek TV series communicators, has a nice metal mesh on top, a good heft, etc. But the things it can do! So it says all of this stuff:
• "Enterprise, this is Kirk." (Captain Kirk)
• "Spock here, Captain." (Spock)
• "Bridge here, Captain."
• "Transporter room ready to beam up."
• "Bridge, this is the captain." (Captain Kirk)
• "Enterprise to Mr. Spock."
• "Scotty here, Captain." (Scotty)
But you can set it to call you, so you can be walking around, get the little noise, and hear Spock say, "Captain, shall I beam down an armed party?" It's a nerdy steal at only $30, and if you order it at Entertainment Earth, you get a bonus phrase. Incidentally, If anyone can buy one of these and get laid on the same day, congratulations.
If you've ever wondered by the tagline for Topless Robot is "nerd news, humor and self-loathing," I'd like to direct you to this and the two previous posts. Let's recap:
1) A nerd wrote erotic fan fiction for The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy.
2) A nerd surely greenlit a Lost Boys sequel.
3) And finally, no one but a nerd will be spasmodically penetrating this:
Yes, it's a "sexy" alien blow-up doll. In case the adorable heads of Zatch Bell have covered too much for you, I assure you that the doll has three breasts along with her three "love holes," making it a trifecta in many, many depressing senses. I'm sure there's a Kirk joke around here somewhere, but frankly, I'm too depressed to think of it. I hope a weekend of more innocent nerd pursuits—Sam & Max, Zack & Wiki, scotch and soda—will help the healing process begin. (Via Nerd Approved)
I'm cheating, because this isn't a T-shirt quite yet.
But it clearly needs to be. This stunning Peanuts-inspired design is currently being voted on at Threadless today, and I ask—no, I beg—for all of you to head over there and vote "yes." If not for me, then for the sake of all 10-cent psychologists everywhere.
But sometimes, people insist on eating your brains. We call those people zombies, and they do not take your polite refusal to heart. So prepare yourself by eBaying this Zombie Survival Kit, as seen on Gizmodo, in order to help your dissuade those pesky zombies from chowing down on your delicious cerebellum. And don't forget to save one bullet for yourself!
A couple of weeks ago, I made the claim that 40% of the Japanese economy is based on pedophilia. No one argued with me. I wish they had, because it's hard to argue against this:
Yes, these are trinkets for your cellphone of schoolgirl uniforms. There are 20 to choose from.
And they are all based on real, actual school uniforms worn by female students in Japan. Apparently, the 20 selected are the most "popular" schools, although I'm not sure if that's rated by attendance, the look of the uniforms themselves, or how it easy it is to abduct students in-between classes. (Via JapanSugoi)
Good news, people! The nation of Japan has redeemed itself after the terrible tragedy that was that was the soy sauce-flavored Kit Kat. The lovely Gia of a geek by any other name has discovered Japan's apology for its crimes—the R2-D2 soy sauce dispenser.
Astute fans of insane Japanese Star Wars merchandise will immediately realize that this would make an outstanding companion to the previously released R2-D2 pepper mill. You can pre-order this condiment droid at Strapya for $20.
This shirt from Karmaloop is pretty goddamned hip; probably hipper than most nerds would be comfortable with.
But it also has an image from one of those great Japanese sexploitation flicks of the late '60s and early '70s, so I'm giving it a pass. Besides, if you're a guy wearing this shirt, it's not going to make you look cool—it'll just make you look like you're obsessed with Japanese sexploitation flicks from the '60s and '70s. So enjoy by purchasing it here!
Alternate title: Whizzy wham wham wozzle!
Fox has applied for a trademark for Slurm, better known as the carbonated beverage of choice in the year 3000, as per Futurama. It is indeed secreted from a giant space slug's keister, but it's highly addictive, so that's okay. Gizmodo says the trademark covers:
...carbonated and non-carbonated soft drinks; fruit drinks; fruit juices; mineral and aerated water; bottled drinking water; energy drinks; syrups and powders for making soft drinks and other beverages, namely soft drinks, fruit drinks and tea; coffee-flavored soft drinks; Ramune (Japanese soda pops); powders used in the preparation of isotonic sports drinks and sports beverages.
I have no doubt this will be less an affront to my tastes buds than a soy sauce-flavored Kit Kat.
Organic Hobby sent over this pic of its upcoming Motoko Kusanagi PVC figure from the anime Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex, specifically 2nd Gig. Not much to say other than it'll be available in May for $85, and she has a much nicer ass than I do. Oh, and that she's a futuristic police officer, and this is her most reasonable reasonable crime-fighting uniform, since most of the others include corsets and thigh-high stockings.
1) You're going to feel nerdier for just watching the above video.
2) You're going to want the Halo 3 laser tag weapons anyways, because they are awesome.
Thinkgeek has a full breakdown on the Plasma Pistol, Plasma Rifle and the Shield Generator (oh, it's true, it's true). Add in water balloon-plasma grenades and I'm sold American.
Celebrate Javier Bardem's Academy Award with this 24/7 Magnum shirt. Is Chigurh the friendo? Are you the friendo? I guess you'll just have to call it yourself, otherwise it wouldn't be fair. Buy it here.
My friends have long known about my adoration and not-quite-carnal affection with Christopher Lee, one of the finest character actors and the great performer of villains in all of cinema. Despite the Star Wars prequels being soul-crushing, I can never truly hate them because of Lee as Dooku; he was a bad-ass villain and Jedi. And now, thanks to this statue from Gentle Giant, I now know he's a bad-ass playa, too.
His Sith arm-candy is Asajj Ventress, his apprentice who showed up in the old Clone Wars cartoon who got her ass handed to her by Anakin, and will likely get more of the same in the new Clone Wars CG cartoon. It should be noted that Dooku is most definitely "tappin' that ass," as the padawans like to say. My birthday's coming up, so if I get this, I'll know my friends are good and loving people. If not, I'll be sure to let you all know how much they suck.
Go Ape Shirts had the vision to boldly a imagine a future where gigantic, walking tanks could be prevented from shooting out their own stitches. Shirts for guys and gals—and hoodies, too—are available here, at least until Lucas sees this and sends a C&D.
Finally, a shirt that celebrates how I spent at least 10% of any given day in my childhood—blowing furiously into Nintendo cartridges to make them work.
I did it long after I was told it didn't help, and even after I realized most of my Nintendo cartridges were covered in a fine, dried layer of my spittle. And when I did it, I usually close to an enraged storm cloud than a happy, fluffy white cloud. But I never would have been able to finish Dragon Warrior II without it, by god. But the shirt from NerdyShirts here.
And if you need more shirts to buy, don't forget yesterday's Daily List, The 20 Most Awesome Yet Tremendously Geeky T-Shirts Available.
By Zach Oat
It wasn’t that long ago that having a geeky T-shirt was a sign of failure and social incompetence. Best represented by the armpit-stained Punisher logo T-shirt favored by portly comics nerds the world over, any nerd who wanted to keep a modicum of self-respect had to forgo the geeky t-shirt, and simply reveal his nerdy by talking about Star Wars in mixed company.
Now, things have changed. The advent of nerds being cool has led to some truly cool—but still nerdy—T-shirts, available from nerd artistes across the internet, and ones any nerd should be proud to wear. Here are the 20 greatest shirts for nerds that look great, don’t automatically prevent you from getting laid, and are kind of stylish to boot.
In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate, yet equally important, groups: the police who investigate crime and the district attorneys who prosecute the offenders. Sometimes, Batman helps, too.
If Lennie Briscoe and Batman ever truly teamed up, there would be no crime they could not solve. Celebrate the world's greatest crossover with this t-shirt of Brandon Bird's (he of the amazing Devitomon image) aptly named Crimefighters shirt, available here in a variety of colors for a mere $22 (you can pick up a Devitomon tee while you're there).
I have to be honest with you guys; when I was in junior high and early high school, I played a great deal of Dungeons & Dragons. Worse, I read a lot of D&D novels; not the Dragonlance ones, much, which were bad but at least had their own fantasy world; instead I read the Forgotten Realms novels, which were the most generic and execrable fantasy books ever created. In particular, I read R.A. Salvatore, and followed the character of Drizzt Do'Urden—the on good-hearted dark elf who had two magical scimitars and a pet panther—with mad abandon.
I re-read one of those novels for kicks in my freshman year of college, and was astounded at how mercilessly awful it was. Being now over 30, I shudder to wonder what I would think of them today. All that said, when I think of myself at my nerdiest, most socially awkward, most vile, I think immediately of Drizzt, and thus have more or less felt the character to represent the pinnacle of socially awkward, vile nerdiness.
So anyways, now you can buy his swords, and I swear to God I'm not kidding here, named Twinkle...
...and Icingdeath.
If you thought those names were for small gay men and morbidly obese people, respectively, you were wrong. They're magic swords. And know you know.
I was tempted to save this shirt for Thursday's Geek Apparel of the Week, but I figured you guys should have the opportunity to buy it prior to tomorrow, and also, it's just too awesome to be contained for three days.
Straight from the greatest episode of Futurama ever made comes this shirt, celebrating the President of Earth circa 3000 and his shiny, destructive new robot body. The shirt is available in a variety of colors and shirt styles here. And if you'd like to her robo-Nixon's campaign platform, check the video after the jump.
This week's geek apparel of the week is a triple-threat from ThinkGeek.com—it's stylish, it's incredibly nerdy and it's a great Valentine's Day gift. Here's how it works: you and your partner each wear one of the shirts. A transmitter then detects how close or far apart the shirts are from each other. When you're walking hand in hand, the shirts' display a full, Zelda-style, heart-based life bar. When you dirft apart, the number of full hearts shrink until you get to that dreaded 2 and a 1/2 hearts-full bar (when the warning beeps start coming on—in the game, not the shirts).
Brilliant! You can even fail to buy the transmitter, if you're a cheapskate, or have no one that loves you. See it in action here!
Marc Ecko seems like quite an ass, but darned if he didn't design some good clothes for geeks. Last year, it was announced he and Lucasfilm was team up to make some expensive hipster Star Wars-themed apparel, to coincide with SW's 30th anniversary.
The apparel ranges from T-shirts to hoodies to more hoodies, and admittedly some of them look totally ridiculous, like the rhinestone Stormtrooper hoodie (a sentence I thought I'd never have to type). However, we can't help but the love "Set For Stun" hoodie, seen above (close-up below). It's a mere $78 at Macy's, although I feel fairly confident the Macy's model wearing the hoodie there could not name the three original members of the Max Rebo band.
