Live-Action The Tick Returning With Patrick Warburton?

Friday, August 29, 2014 at 6:29 pm

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Yes...this according to People magazine, an odd source for superhero news, so maybe take it with a grain of salt, but anyway - they say it will be back as an original series for Amazon.com.

The original series was probably a bit too "before its time," but with Guardians of the Galaxy set to become the #1 movie of the year, I'm not surprised funny superheroes are hot again, and this one's a pre-existing property with stars who haven't become super-expensive in the years since.

Are you ready for mysteries to abound again? Also, what is up with that oblong codpiece?

h/t Merrill Barr

GIVEAWAY: Badass 30th Anniversary Voltron T-Shirts

Friday, August 29, 2014 at 4:42 pm

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We ain't lion - these TV Store Online Voltron shirts are pretty sweet and you can win the pair of them, doing your part to defend the universe from the scourge of naked torsos. As a special bonus, this offer isn't just open to U.S. residents...but Canadians too! You folks probably need a couple extra layers for winter anyway.

Labor Day ends the summer movie season, so here's what we'll do: in comments below, tell me what you'd do if you had complete power to remake one of this year's summer films, but were forbidden to use anyone involved in the original (i.e. you can't remake Captain America 2 and still have Chris Evans play Cap). Use your powers for good or evil, and for the sake of argument, we'll define "summer" as loosely as you like. Just be entertaining.

The entry period closes next Friday, Sept. 5th at noon. Enter as often you like, remembering that quality usually triumphs over quantity.

Image above is for illustration only - sizes up to XXXL are available.

Believe It or Not...Lego Movie Makers Rebooting Greatest American Hero for TV

Friday, August 29, 2014 at 2:23 pm

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Shmails

I always imagined this would get a movie instead, but no. Chris Miller and Phil Lord are producing a pilot for TV. This time around, the teacher works in an inner-city school and is named Isaac, so I guess it's conceivable this could be in continuity, since the original series ended with a spin-off where a woman got Ralph's super-suit.

The old series is fun, but a lot of it is badly dated, particularly in its frequent use and re-use of stock footage. What is also dated - sadly - is that the show was extraordinarily politically evenhanded: hippy-dippy liberal teacher Ralph and raving rightie gun-nut Bill were equally mocked and extolled, and they always had to work together to solve the issues. Somehow I imagine that's less likely than Ralph to truly fly today.

But give me a Lonely Island faux-hip-hop cover of the classic theme and I might be won over. Now...would you rather see the show do spandex, or rubber nipples?

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For Everyone Who's Ever Wanted to See Gleek, the Super Friends Monkey, Get Naked...

Friday, August 29, 2014 at 1:37 pm

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Figures Toy Company

...here you go. He was naughty to remove his clothes, so I think you better spank that monkey.

Figures Toy Company makes Mego-style figures, and just announced a Super Friends line that will pretty clearly include the Wonder Twins and their favorite Simian. But they also don't just do cartoony likenesses - check out their headsculpt for the blue-faced, Austrian-accented Mr. Freeze that isn't the one you hate.

Literally the Best Funny Video You'll See Today...Maybe

Friday, August 29, 2014 at 11:30 am

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Words mean things. As editors we know this - reading a free newspaper yesterday I was actually annoyed by a restaurant review which stated that when Dorothy said, "There's no place like home," they were SURE she meant a restaurant in the San Fernando Valley named "Home." Really? You're sure of that? Not a moment of doubt that Judy Garland had that specific motivation when she uttered the line on camera?

But sometimes we lose. "Literally" doesn't entirely mean what it used to...and CollegeHumor is very angry about that, it seems. Behold "The Boy Who Cried 'Literally.'"

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I READ YOUR FANFIC! "The Quest for the Holey Grail Part 2" by KingAurthr2

Friday, August 29, 2014 at 8:00 am

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If you want to submit fan fiction for me to read, please send it - or a link to it - to toplessrobot-at-gmail-dot-com with subject line "Read my Fanfic!"

The real quest is my quest to get through the dumbest fucking thing I have ever read and maintain my composure. We're not there yet, but Greg and I give it our all in another "exciting" installment of this all-out assault on spelling, grammar and logic.

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Dramatic Readings of Reader Comments: Tupper Adam

Thursday, August 28, 2014 at 4:15 pm

You asked. I delivered.

Happy analversary.

Topless Toy Chest: WWE Debut Mankind by Mattel (Amazon.com Exclusive)

Thursday, August 28, 2014 at 2:30 pm

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While "Mankind" scaled his greatest professional heights when he acknowledged his name was Mick Foley and was allowed to do goofy stuff with sweatsocks, he had a pretty good run before that as a monster-type character who lived in a boiler room, tore out his own hair, and needed to be soothed with piano music. The very first figure of him in this guise was made in the second series of Jakks Pacific's Bone Crunchers, and was by far the best in that line for a long time. Mattel has finally made him as a classic...but he's only available on Amazon. As you'll see, there are some pluses and minuses to this.

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Ask Luke's Mother-in-Law: Who Is Adam Henry? The Answer May Surprise You...

Thursday, August 28, 2014 at 8:00 am

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Martha Boyd is not just Luke's mother-in-law - she's also an ex-cop, a landlord, a self-described crazy cat lady, a major Star Trek geek and the widow of a green beret. So go ahead: ask her anything. And we mean anything.

Hello, hello and thank you all for the words of support. Nothing P.O.'d me this week - how about that, so nothing to rant about, LOL. Was looking through the computer and I don't even have any new photos this week - must be slipping, so here's one of my ferret.

I just spent time still trying to get rid of my cold and trying to do appraisals in between sneezing. So I just poured another ice coffee and added some Coffee spirits - after all it has to be 5 p.m. somewhere in the world. That's also what I tell my mom when we go to Mexico and I am having a pina colada at 11 am. Yes, my 89 yr-old mom still corrects me, so don't feel bad. Hope all of our readers up in the Northern parts of California are okay and did not have damage from the recent earthquake, but it does look like the price of CA wine might be heading up. Napa really got hit hard.

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Doctor Who to Officially Materialize in Minecraft

Wednesday, August 27, 2014 at 11:30 am

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Starting with skin packs of six Doctors each, Minecraft will begin adding multiple characters and aliens from the show starting in September. You've got to have those companions in order to teach the Doctor how to tame a horse.

While I love how they've captured Peter Capaldi in the simple block style, does anybody else maybe suspect that with a slight color swap, he'd reveal himself to love lasagna...and hate Mondays?

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I'd add the cat ears except that I have no idea how to do it and not make it look terrible.