The contest was to come up with a porn parody title based on a video game. As it was Bryce's idea, I let him decide the winner.
Honorable mentions are:
Jim Dandeneau - John Madden Foot Fetish 1996
Ryan Marsh - Two Girls One Cuphead
Nigel Crandall - Womb Raider
Steve Sulewski - Golden Brown Eye
Your winner is...More >>
If you thought Mario in a realistic universe could only look like Bob Hoskins, think again. Here's the plumber in a world generated by the Unreal 4 engine, and while he may seem a little out of place, he still looks ready to kick the shell out of it.More >>
Donkey Kong has met the enemy, and he is us, er, him.
Of course, there are religious fundamentalists out there who insist that this process as depicted did not happen, and that Mario and Kong were created independently from handfuls of pixels in some sort of Supreme Creator's hands...but what kind of reactionary believes THAT?
The shirt is $11 at Ript.
Every kid who had a Nintendo in the late '80s remembers The Wizard, featuring Fred Savage as the protective brother of a silent videogame savant, numerous plugs for Super Mario Bros. 3 and the Power Glove, and future pop diva Jenny Lewis as the runaway who befriends the heroic duo.
Only one of us has turned it into an Italian opera called Il Mago. It was performed at Space 55 in Phoenix, AZ, and director Bill Binder says, "In addition to regular performances, they have an event a few times a year called "Seven Minutes in Heaven" when they invite local artists to put together a seven minute piece. I have participated a few times in years past. They had an open slot and asked about three weeks ago if I could put something together. I thought the dumbest thing to put together for a seven minute act in a variety show would be an opera based on The Wizard, so I called some local singers, a composer and someone who speaks Italian and they all were eager to jump onboard."
Luckily for you, the production was filmed...and it's only just begun when the fat lady sings!More >>
Martha Boyd is not just Luke's mother-in-law - she's also an ex-cop, a landlord, a self-described crazy cat lady, a major Star Trek geek and the widow of a green beret. So go ahead: ask her anything. And we mean anything. Comment below with questions, or email them to boydappraisal at yahoo dot com.
Well, this is the last full week of June; my, how time flies. It is almost Christmas. Soon we will be seeing the decorations going up again in the stores. Sending this week a picture of Mr Frizzy watching all of you from his lair. I think he has that "I know what you are doing" look on his face.More >>
E3, as you know, is an industry-only show, and unfortunately unavailable to many fans who'd love to check out all the newest games. We can't get you in there, but we can do the next best thing. Having forced Bryce and Kyle to surrender their free swag on pain of death (just kidding: pain of cramming), I'm now going to give it to one of you. This package of exclusive stuff includes a Banjo-Kazooie giant foam hand, Oculus Rift T-shirt, Star Wars Infinity 3.0 Yoda figure, Armikrog original character sketch signed by Earthworm Jim artist Mike Dietz, a poster from Devolver Digital, Dark Souls 3 power bank and Tom Clancy's The Division snow globe.
At Bryce's suggestion, here are the rules: in comments below, come up with a porn parody name for a video game, in the vein of Wood Rocket's "Strokemon." You may enter up to five names, and whichever I like best, for whatever reason, I will pick. I'll close the contest this coming Monday, June 29th, at noon.
Not to be confused with the nihilistic mini-franchise Uwe Boll thinks he's been making, the classic Rampage game lets you trash major cities as George the giant gorilla, Lizzie the lizard or Ralph the wolf. Dwayne Johnson would make a great George or Ralph, though Deadline is reporting that he'll be opposing the monsters. I hope that's just a guess, as the whole point of Rampage was to make you identify with the creatures and triumph over the puny humans. And frankly, the Rock needs to do some more bad-guy stuff onscreen - his public persona is getting painfully close to Rocky Maivia levels, as the legacy dude who just smiles all the time. We need a heel turn.
Cast Rocky as George, Ronda Rousey as Lizzie and Kevin Durand as Ralph. I'd be down for a ticket.
Some jackass is teaching a computer how to play Mario Kart, because it's not enough that you have to try and lodge a Wii-mote in your friend's skull every time you play. Now you get the added terror of contributing to the eventual robot uprising with every lap. You can watch our existence as apex predators continue to erode on his Twitch stream here, or you can check out his shameful excuse for being a species traitor below the fold.
We're negotiating LYT's return to the country with the authorities, and we hit a little snag, so I'm going to be your guide through the nine circles of nerddom for one more day. Hope you survive the experience!
After the jump, we'll have a brief roundup of a surprisingly busy weekend for nerd news, including a look at some of those new Transformers Hasbro announced at BotCon over the weekend.More >>