Dax Shepard Will Write, Direct and Star in Non-Spoof CHiPs Movie

By Luke Y. Thompson in Movies, TV
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 5:37 pm

chips_movie.jpg

He's not kidding.

Apparently, Dax Shepard - who loves him some motorcycles - is determined to write, direct and star in a big-screen version of the TV show that Erik Estrada is still trying to milk nostalgia for (Michael Pena will play Ponch, and as you read this I'm sure Estrada is lobbying to play his dad). No joke: "The new take is envisioned as much in the tone of Bad Boys and Lethal Weapon than a comedy."

I'd like to defer to Brodie from Mallrats on this: "Why can't they remake good shows, like BJ and the Bear? There's a concept I can't get enough of: a man and his monkey."

(Why yes, it is a slow news day. Why do you ask?)

James and Sean Gunn "Get Grooted" by Mass of Marvel Cosplayers

By Luke Y. Thompson in Comics, Music, Nerdery
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 4:20 pm

grooting.jpg

So it seems "Grooting" is a thing now - you dance like a baby Groot behind someone's back, and stay perfectly still when they turn to look around.

I'm pretty sure the brothers Gunn are in on the joke, but it's still pretty cool.

What the Hell Happened to TMNT's Bebop?

By Luke Y. Thompson in Cartoons, Toys
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 2:29 pm

Bebop-and-Rocksteady-Playmates-Toys-Nickelodeon.jpg

Rocksteady's got the same military vibe going, but what's up with his piggy pal? Did he raid Megan Fox's wardrobe? Or Olivia Wilde's from Tron? Maybe the cartoon explains it.

I'd like to think that is an extremely elaborate in-joke - a sort of Hawkeye Initiative dig at the way the New 52 redesigns female superheroes. Because I'd say Jean Grey wore it slightly better:

toybiz_jeangrey.jpg
The Epic Toy Company

I feel like the ladies maybe deserve someone better looking than a pig in their version.

h/t TeenageMutantNinjaTurtles.com

So, How Will the King David Side-Scrolling Game Feature Interactive Adultery?

By Luke Y. Thompson in Books, Video Games
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 1:44 pm

kingdavid_sidescroller.jpg

Seems like a fair question if the plan is to base games on every single book of the Bible - at some point you're going to have to turn some of the more unsavory, sinful stuff into interactive levels. Coming from "the twins who trained 40,000 game developers" (did they train them well? That's left unsaid), this Kickstarter-funded game based on David is seeking a mere $35,000. And yet the pitch is almost completely secular (save a couple of faith-based endorsements), based on the notion that the Bible is simply a popular book. And none of the "episodes" mentions Uriah...

(Atlas Shrugged is also a popular book, but that didn't make the movies that have been based on it a good financial idea.)

I honestly wonder if the Tornado Twins have actually sat down and read the Bible cover-to-cover, because some of those books will be tough to turn into popular playable adventures. I'm looking at you, Deuteronomy.

Pepper the Robot On-Sale in the U.S. Next Year

By Luke Y. Thompson in Tech
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 11:33 am

pepper_the_robot.jpg

"Heez goal iz to make you better...feel better." Freudian slip?

Pepper the Robot is coming to Sprint stores next year, probably for just under two grand. Inspired by the idea of Astro Boy, Pepper dances, makes jokes, estimates human emotions based on expressions, and tries to connect you to friends if you're feeling depressed. Pepper also presumably stares blankly into nothingness when turned off - sorry, but I'm suspicious of anything that looks like this:

Ibringyoulove.jpg

Check out some video of Pepper that is totally in no way creepy...

In Addition to Everything Else, Is Michael Bay the Reason You're Fat?

By Luke Y. Thompson in Movies, TV
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 10:00 am

anthony_anderson_donuts.jpg

"Michael Bay makes viewers snack more, says Cornell University study." Hey, it says that in the UK's prestigious Guardian newspaper. Citing an article in the L.A. Times, the publication notes that a test group supplied with healthy and unhealthy snacks ate more junk food watching a Michael Bay movie than "a slow-paced talk show."

Is this the most legit reason yet to complain about Michael Bay?

Blu-ray Today: Firestarter, Dracula, Universal Monsters, Godzilla and Megalon

By Luke Y. Thompson in DVDs
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 8:00 am

theycametogether.jpg
They Came Together - There is a lot of stuff coming out on Blu-ray today that's in our wheelhouse, but a whole lot of it is also mediocre-to-crap; as such, the best release of the week is this skewering of romantic comedy tropes by The State's David Wain. For my money, this is not only superior to his Wet Hot American Summer, but almost on a par with the best of the Zucker-Abrams-Zucker spoof movies, with a similar formula: throw as many jokes as you can out there with such rapid-fire intensity that some of them will hit, all while spoofing tropes rather than scenes from specific movies. There's a bit where Paul Rudd goes into a bar after a bad day - involving the bartender's absolutely literal responses to the phrases "Tell me about it" and "You can say that again" - that's one of the funniest damn things I've seen in a year that also gave us Will Arnett's Lego Batman and Batista as autistic Drax.

So don't be fooled by the cover art - this is pure comedy of the absurd, with Rudd and Amy Poehler just good-looking enough to pass for chick-flick stars, but also just off-kilter and weird enough to play in the no-rules universe that rips every modern rom-com cliche to shreds.

Robotic Gaming Monthly - PAX, Gamescom, and Sad Signs O' The Times

By Kyle LeClair in Video Games
Tuesday, September 2, 2014 at 6:00 am

RGM4Header2.png
Artwork by CitrusKing46

And welcome to yet another edition of Robotic Gaming Monthly, Topless Robot's monthly column devoted to providing a peek into the latest happenings in the gaming industry, which I admit is hard to do monthly, but eh, we do what we can.

So you may have heard that Gamescom and PAX Prime, two massive gaming events, took place in the last few weeks. As such, we kind of have quite a bit of ground to cover, which is why we have an expanded section for trailers this month featuring some of the most notable games from the two shows! That's right folks, it's a double dose of Daily Lists...kinda! Still, yayyy!!

Happy Labor Day! Here Are Two Furries Cage-Fighting.

By Luke Y. Thompson in Nerdery, Video Games
Monday, September 1, 2014 at 12:00 pm

furrycagefight.jpg

Tomorrow is the first Tuesday of the month, which means an all-new, jam-packed Robotic Gaming Monthly feature will be coming your way, and among the topics covered will be PAX Prime 2014, which has been going on all weekend.

But neither Kyle nor I could resist giving you this early taste of Ubisoft's major contribution; the Far Cry 4 arena, in which volunteers can enter the cage as as an elephant, a snow leopard, a bear, or a honey badger, and get fast and furry-ous with the fisticuffs.

Hey, you worked hard this year. You EARNED this video of people dressed as stuffed toys trying to hurt each other.

Talk and Relevant Discussions in Snark: "Into the Dalek" SPOILER Thread

By Luke Y. Thompson in TV
Monday, September 1, 2014 at 8:00 am

doctor_who_into_the_dalek.jpg

I'll start with a few of my thoughts...