By Rob Bricken in
Daily Lists, Toys
Tuesday, Feb. 5 2008 @ 5:00AM
By Zach Oat
Nowadays, it seems like every celebrity under the sun has an action figure. Corey Feldman just got one, and Cary Elwes has one on the way, and if that isn’t a sign of the apocalypse, I don’t know what is. (Granted, it’s for the long overdue The Princess Bride, but still…Cary Elwes!) But what about the toys that unintentionally resemble celebrities? In its early years, the Star Wars line suffered from a lot of terrible likenesses, and while we couldn’t find any that looked like Cary Elwes (although there were too many who looked like Corey Feldman to count), we did find ten figures that were the spitting images of actors they were absolutely, positively not intended to resemble.
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10. Luke Skywalker / Brian Thompson
When Star Wars figures first came back in the 1990s, Kenner (for some bizarre reason) beefed up all of their characters to ridiculous proportions. So the scrawny farm boy played by Mark Hamill came out looking like the muscle-bound Alien Bounty Hunter from The X-Files, complete with overly defined facial muscles. Would Thompson have improved Star Wars? We doubt it. Would Mark Hamill have improved X-Files? Mark Hamill improves everything.
9. Han Solo / Josh Brolin
Apparently, Harrison Ford’s rugged good looks are hard to capture in three dimensions—that’s the only way to explain all the Han Solo and Indiana Jones figures that look like everybody in Hollywood except Ford. This particular figure is a little too long-faced for Han, but just right for Brolin, the star of No Country for Old Men. If only he were playing Indy in this year’s Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, rather than that Ford mummy.
8. Malakili / Denholm Elliott
There’s something about the sensitive eyes and tight mouth of Jabba the Hutt’s palace employee and rancor keeper Malakili that reminds us of Indiana Jones’ Marcus Brody, who got lost in his own museum once. The Nazis never would have caught him if he’d had a trap door and a Rancor monster.
7. Mon Mothma / Laura Bush
As the leader of the Rebellion, Mon Mothma was one of the first to recognize the sheer evil of Emperor Palpatine, as he subjugated outlying planets to his will and undermined the power of the Senate. Similarly, as the wife of President Bush, Laura oversaw the destruction of Alderaan and personally struck down four highly trained Jedi.
6. Slave Leia / Christian Bale
A mannish Princess Leia action figure? Say it ain’t so! To be fair, Carrie Fisher was not the daintiest of leading ladies, and Christian Bale is not the most rugged of leading men, so the fact that their action figures would kind of look alike isn’t so surprising. The fact that we’ve seen Bale naked and not Fisher? Not so much surprising as gravely disappointing.
5. 12-Inch Han Solo / Zach Braff
One year after our #10 figure was released, Hasbro again attempted to capture the majesty that is Harrison Ford in their 12-inch Collector’s Series. This time, the sculptor tried to give Ford a little more schnozz but overshot, landing squarely in Zach Braff territory. Sadly, Dr. Dorian has only had fantasies where he dressed as Luke Skywalker—otherwise, this could have been the first Scrubs figure. Is anyone excited by this? You know, besides Braff?
4. Dengar / Johnny Cash
When Cash did all of those drugs, was he mystically transported to another planet in the distant past, where he hunted men for sport and profit? Man, that would have made Walk the Line a lot more interesting, if fraught with legal complications. Still, you can’t deny the fact that the worn, lined face of the Man in Black is the spitting image of the Man in Bandages, who hunted Han Solo (unsuccessfully) for Darth Vader. Fun Fact: Boba Fett was the best man at both of their weddings!
3. General Rieekan / John Kerry
This Rebellion general commanded Echo Base on the remote ice planet Hoth. We’re not sure, but we think that’s where John Kerry is now.
2. Yak Face / Robert DeNiro
“Are you yakkin’ at me? I’m the only yak here.” DeNiro was already a major superstar when he was asked to play Saelt-Marae, a.k.a. Yak Face, in Return of the Jedi, but he owed Lucas a favor, and so he tried to bring a lot of the energy he brought to Travis Bickle to the performance. Namely, he asked Ree-Yees if he had fucked his wife, then savagely beat him to death.
1. Princess Leia / Virgil the Chimp
Word has spread far and wide of the legendary “Monkey-Faced Leia,” but few have noticed that she bears an uncanny resemblance to Project X star Willie, who played Virgil. Sadly, it was Willie’s only film role before he was sent to bomb the Soviet Union, but he’d be glad to know that he got a toy out of the deal—and with such a nice dress!
117 comments
Comments
Anonymous said:
Why don't you have closeups of the doll heads? Kind of ruins the effect.
Anonymous said:
why don't you try clicking on the photos?
tim said:
The last picture of Princess Leia doll looks a lot like America Ferrera (aka Ugly Betty) and less like a chimp.
emon xie said:
Anonymous 1 / C3PO
Anonymous 2 / R2-D2
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Anonymous said:
Yeah I heard Rieekan testified against the Rebels after the Empire was defeated.
A Whole Lot of Nothing said:
General Rieekan / John Kerry is right on.
Kieran said:
DeNiro was already a major superstar when he was asked to play Saelt-Marae, a.k.a. Yak Face, in Return of the Jedi
I lol'd.
deeprest said:
The old classic Han Solo is the spit of Cliff Richard (UKs answer to Elvis...
Cliff - http://www.tonythetoyman.com/starwars/figures/moc/pics/moc-hansolo-f.jpg
Han - http://991.com/newGallery/Cliff-Richard-Official-Calendar-395613a.jpg
Ward said:
Hey Zach, Don't forget Marvel Legends White Queen and Dina Lohan:
http://www.superherotimes.com/news/images/480-Emma15.jpg
http://popdish.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/08/dina-lohan.jpg
The Man With The Sack said:
What, no Jar Jar Binks/Whoopie Golberg? Oh yeah, that's right, no one cared about JJB enough to make a toy figure out of him. Good riddance.
james said:
Princess Leia IS Anthony Kiedis
http://www.foreignamericanpictures.com/leia-anthony.jpg
Very funny. Great eye.
Thanks for sharing.
Jason said:
No dude. Malaki looks EXACTLY like Jim Broadbent.
saltbagginsam said:
How 'bout Malaki = Stephen Fry?
Lisa said:
The funniest part of the whole post is the first two comments, although the buffed Luke Skywalker doll is a good second.
ArtF said:
Malakili looks more to me like R. Lee Ermey, the actor who played the drill instructor in Full Metal Jacket. "What is your major malfunction, Skywalker!"
STEVE-O said:
"The fact that we’ve seen Bale naked and not Fisher? Not so much surprising as gravely disappointing."
Umm ever heard of a little title called Playboy? Fisher had a nice spread at her finest right after ROTJ.
Sir Squintsalot said:
You should have close-ups of the dolls.
supaswag said:
Great post!!! Just dugg it. Go there and push it some more >> http://www.digg.com/celebrity/10_Star_Wars_toys_that_unintentionally_look_like_celebrities
bleh said:
This made it on Fark’s main page, somehow, BTW when trying to compare two faces it is best to actually focus on the said faces
DNR said:
#8 (Malakili) looks more like John Wayne to me
asdf said:
"few have noticed that she bears an uncanny resemblance to Project X star Willie"
Uhh no one noticed because the doll looks nothing like the monkey, you FAIL
apple pie recipe said:
I laughed so hard I nearly had coffee come out my nose here at the office.
Anonymous said:
A+
the Leia/Bale comparison got me best.
Jmarsh said:
STEVE-O said
"Umm ever heard of a little title called Playboy? Fisher had a nice spread at her finest right after ROTJ."
Fisher never did a spread in Playboy... she did a 20 questions interview. check it out July 1983, Vol. 30, Iss. 7, pg. 152-153+204-206
Kessa said:
Also, the Galactic Heroes Han Solo (action figures for preschoolers) looks just like David Duchovny!
Vanilla Gorilla said:
The FIRST 2 comments are the best part of the whole mess.
Kerry O said:
This is funny -- my son has an Anakin Skywalker action figure that looks nothing like Hayden Christensen, but looks a LOT like Andy Dick.
goober said:
Anonymous said:
why don't you try clicking on the photos?
Isn't seeing them side by side the whole point? Good idea, bad design. Wait, is it meta joke?!
TV said:
Weird. Not 30 minutes ago, I was telling a co-worker that the X-Wing pilot from my son's X-Wing Rogue Squadron comic pack looks like Brad Pitt. Then I saw this posting on USA Today's Pop Candy.
Lynda said:
You missed BoShek/Kevin Spacey. (Photo of BoShek here).
http://www.rebelscum.com/photo.asp?image=/toys2/potjboshekloosefront.jpg
Anonymous said:
This was totally stupid, with the possible exception of the John Kerry and Christian Bales posts none looked close to their counterparts.
Larry said:
The only problem I got with all this is somebody has way to much time on their hands to figure all this out... Has anybody wondered why Denholm Elliot isn't called Elliot Denholm???
Caroline said:
This was awesome. I loved them all, but I think my favourite was the Laura Bush one. And everyone who is complaining should stop. Because it is annoying. Just read the fun article and move on with your day.
Movie Downloads said:
Great post, I have also dugg this!
Born4thesurf
Lynda said:
I always said the BoShek figure looked like Kevin Spacey.
kitty_strydom@yahoo.com said:
this was sooo funny.I remember about the first collection,there was a Leia from the Empire strikes back,with the Snow outfit that looked like Martha Plimpton...luna
kitty_strydom@yahoo.com said:
this was sooo funny.I remember about the first collection,there was a Leia from the Empire strikes back,with the Snow outfit that looked like Martha Plimpton...luna
chadillac said:
Malakili = Ricky Gervais, hands down.
"rancor, killed? ..are you having a laugh?!?!"
Anonymous said:
To be fare to the toy sculpter, General Rieekan also looks alot like Bruce Boa, the actor who played him.
cardi said:
These were great.
Marc Savoy said:
I'm sorry, but the fact that most of them do not resemble
the celebrities you claim they do, nor identify the chimp
as a celebrity, really makes this post quite lame.
Mike S said:
You left out 1984 Luke Stormtrooper disguise = Steve Irwin
Lynda said:
You left out POTJ's BoShek with Kevin Spacey's head, too.
Kooshmeister said:
Personally I think the recent Kir Kanos and Carnor Jax figures look like Ben Affleck and Tim Robbins, respectively.
Andre said:
I had (and now my son has) a Lando that looks just like Omar Sharif from Lawrence of Arabia.
cfire said:
That was completely genius. My complements!
Anonymous said:
what will happen in alt of productions of action figures (outside of todd's toys) is that they will use old molds and combine them with others to save on production as opposed to making good figures. larger developments that have been cashing in on these cows are the most frequent of abusers
Anonymous said:
what will happen in alt of productions of action figures (outside of todd's toys) is that they will use old molds and combine them with others to save on production as opposed to making good figures. larger developments that have been cashing in on these cows are the most frequent of abusers
Eimei Takeda said:
Great!
Not Star Wars though, I am doing something similar at my website.
Most written in Japanese but you can just look at them and enjoy.
Please visit (heavy, takes long to show whole)
http://web.mac.com/eimeit/Site/Casting_Boards/Casting_Boards.html
none said:
tim said:
The last picture of Princess Leia doll looks a lot like America Ferrera (aka Ugly Betty) and less like a chimp.
America Ferrera looks like a chimp
The fact that we’ve seen Bale naked and not Fisher? Not so much surprising as gravely disappointing.
Have you seen her face lately?She makes ugly betty beautiful
Tarkin said:
none said: Have you seen her face lately?She makes ugly betty beautiful
...thats not nice...i want to see what you look like at age 186. Also, I noticed that Dooku looks like Dracula from Hammer films and Tarkin looks like Van Helsing from...oddly enough...Hammer films???
ABS said:
HAHAHA, just got in to the office and somehow found this, made my morning, now stuff like this is what the internet was created for.
Come to think of it my Jabba the Hut figure circa 1976 looks like Dick Cheney
gerard pawling said:
what about darth vader and dick cheney
blue snag said:
The best is what "James" linked to, Anthony Kiedis as Leia!
John Kerry was a good one, so was Johnny Cash (I also nominate Peter Boyle for Dengar).
The rest of them were kind of dumb, especially the chimp and DeNiro ones.
job doodles said:
The dolls' faces should be enlarged!!
job doodles said:
The dolls' faces should have been shown close up
jam said:
I don't know if you could really say that Rieekan unintentionally looks like Kerry, because the original actor looked almost exactly like him too.
Anonymous said:
That's just amazing.
Anonymous said:
Ugly Betty looks like a chimp, so there.
Tom said:
I remember having what people refer to as the "Chimp-faced Leia". I always thought it looked like Mel Brooks in a leotard.
Jonesy said:
Nobody talks about how the first Hasbro Death Star Trooper looks just like Miguel Ferrer...
Anonymous said:
On a slightly related note, the packaging picture for the Tycho Celchu figure looks like they used Will Ferrel for the facial likeness.
Box image:
http://www.rebelscum.com/photo.asp?image=/TAC/TAC44awingcardfr.jpg
Will Ferrel:
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2222496256/nm0002071
bgiles73 said:
I was thinking that new A-wing pilot looks alot like Owen Wilson!
bgiles73 said:
heres a picture:
Toddie said:
Geez, what lively posting on a cotton candy piece.
Quit worrying, live your life.
And DeNiro/Yak Face made me choke!
Lovely.
james said:
this page said:
this could have been the first Scrubs figure. Is anyone excited by this? You know, besides Braff?
Unless you havent noticed scrubs is one of the funniest shows on tv and i wouldnt mind having a JD or Turk action figure.
zombie8 said:
The Biggs Darklighter figure looks a little like Freddie Mercury.
Javier Hernández said:
Don´t you have any job?
the great bird of the galaxy said:
WICKET W. WARWICK TED E. RUXPIN
nigel said:
To me, Dengar looks like Steve Martin.
Squidboy said:
In a slightly different manner, I have the best one yet. When I was a kid, my mom got me a Luke Skywalker toothbrush. It was brown with a very small and very smudgy image of Luke holding his lightsaber above his head. For reasons that were lost on me at the time, my parents used to laugh themselves silly about it, to the point where they bought a second toothbrush just for them.
Years later I found out why: If you looked at the image of Luke for a minute, it looks like a younger Woody Allen.
Once you see it, that's all you can see. You stop seeing Luke at all. I'll try to post a picture if I can.
Squidboy said:
In a slightly different manner, I have the best one yet. When I was a kid, my mom got me a Luke Skywalker toothbrush. It was brown with a very small and very smudgy image of Luke holding his lightsaber above his head. For reasons that were lost on me at the time, my parents used to laugh themselves silly about it, to the point where they bought a second toothbrush just for them.
Years later I found out why: If you looked at the image of Luke for a minute, it looks like a younger Woody Allen.
Once you see it, that's all you can see. You stop seeing Luke at all. I'll try to post a picture if I can.
Squidboy said:
In a slightly different manner, I have the best one yet. When I was a kid, my mom got me a Luke Skywalker toothbrush. It was brown with a very small and very smudgy image of Luke holding his lightsaber above his head. For reasons that were lost on me at the time, my parents used to laugh themselves silly about it, to the point where they bought a second toothbrush just for them.
Years later I found out why: If you looked at the image of Luke for a minute, it looks like a younger Woody Allen.
Once you see it, that's all you can see. You stop seeing Luke at all. I'll try to post a picture if I can.
Tom W. said:
the actual general reikaan in the movie looks even more like kerry...
amsterdandi said:
I.Can't.Breath... Can you hear me laughing all the way from Amsterdam? Those first two comments shut me down too. Love the Kerry doppleganger and Leia v. Anthony Kiedis. Too much. Big shoutout from Holland for the super cool site. Cheers from a recovering Texan afloat in Amsterdam!
amsterdandi said:
can't breath... or breathe either, actually
Zen said:
Derek Hough & Ken:
http://totallylookslike.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/derek-hough.jpg
Introspective said:
A good match of toy image and real characters. Maybe that was the intention of designers?
Johnny said:
I LOVE Scrubs! I reckon Braff would be happy to look like a Star Wars toy, but how cool would it be to have a real JD or (even better!) Janitor doll!
LOL!
Wook said:
Right click?
Joe M. said:
The 12" Han Solo looks like Michael Richards (Kramer from Seinfeld). And, Malakili's face looks like Albert Finney, right down to the glassy, pointing-in-two-different-directions eyes.
gold5 said:
STEVE-O said:
"The fact that we’ve seen Bale naked and not Fisher? Not so much surprising as gravely disappointing."
Umm ever heard of a little title called Playboy? Fisher had a nice spread at her finest right after ROTJ."
Ummm, no, we didn't.
http://www.geocities.com/hollywood/boulevard/8380/nude.htm
anon-e-moose said:
excellent list... you should really post these up at totallylookslike.com
7676 said:
Hi. Nice pictures.
Borellus said:
Umm the Princess Leia one is badly done. In the movies she is hot :)
Please visit my blog :)
Walle said:
It's has a sense. Nice collection for your site.
vabLisse said:
emm.. really like it.
soaclette said:
hmm.. funny ))
Monkey-_ said:
There is a Endor Rebel Trooper who I think looks a lot like Tom Green
http://image38.webshots.com/38/0/88/38/2053088380053876917BTJHCw_fs.jpg
Next to Lando
Download movie said:
Great post, I have also dugg this!
Born4thesurf
chopshopstore said:
Oh man… i thought for sure you would have the Fonz on here. There were two versions of Han Solo's head done on the original set. The big head Han Solo as it is known looks like the Fonz to me: http://www.swscout.com/images/fig-han-big.JPG
HaxFauth said:
now I'll stay in touch..
Jimmy Soto said:
ROTFL Yak Face/Robert DeNiro! Priceless dude, Priceless!
Riff
www.online-privacy.vze.com
jose said:
hahahaha nice this was awsome
revDJkev said:
-- @Steve-O
what kind of crack do you smoke???
Carrie Fisher in Playboy???????
Whatev. . .she did a '20 questions' interview (I checked with my friend google, and he's pretty smart!) and that is it. . .has nothing to do with a 'nice spread' as you claim.
psychic readings said:
Thanks for the interesting article!
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Lego said:
Lego – the best toys ever for developing your kids skills and imagination.
Miss Me said:
ABS said:
Come to think of it my Jabba the Hut figure circa 1976 looks like Dick Cheney
Laughing... Too... Hard...
Anonymous said:
"The last picture of Princess Leia doll looks a lot like America Ferrera (aka Ugly Betty) and less like a chimp."
Clearly, you're either blind, you don't watch ugly betty, or you're a dude. America Ferrera is a motherfucking GORRILLA.
katt said:
"The last picture of Princess Leia doll looks a lot like America Ferrera (aka Ugly Betty) and less like a chimp."
Clearly, you're either blind, you don't watch ugly betty, or you're a dude. America Ferrera is a motherfucking GORRILLA.
ShadLovesmen said:
The last Leia pic looks like "Blossom."
Free Yoga said:
You had me at Christian Bail...AKA Christina Bail
B.C. Cakes said:
Y'know, when I got some of those newer figures (Han Solo in particular) I was all, "This looks like someone. Who does it look like?"
Great list. Absolutely hysterical. I did a spit-take at the whole Dengar = Johnny Cash thing.
SaMM said:
Thank you for the 1st laugh I've had in over a week
Nancy said:
So funny i like Yak Face-Robert DeNiro
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lusy said:
haha Mon Mothma looks exactly like Laura BUSH... you guys are really funny.
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Bookaroo said:
Hum ! Very funny pictures !!! Thanks
I'm a maniac of Star Wars action figures.
My site:
THE STAR WARS COLLECTIBLES KINGDOM
http://www.myfantasyweb.com/starwars/starwars.html
Continue your great ...and funny ...job !!!
Lego Star Wars said:
These Star Wars guys are so cool!
Leksaker på nätet said:
Cool!
E-Liquid said:
Man I use to have a bunch of Star Wars figures wheres toys!
Cash Gifting said:
Lol Josh Brolin does look more so like Han Solo than Harrison Ford..
ESmoker said:
I Think the John Kerry one is the best
Cep Giydir said:
Cool. i like to have a Frank Sinatra and Bon Jovi.!
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