The 7 Most Quintessentially American Pop Culture Icons
Posted at 7:58 AM Jul 03, 2008
By Teague Bohlen
The 4th of July is tomorrow, not today. Yet, like all true Americans, we'll be cooking out and shooting off illegal fireworks and drinking beer from 11 a.m. tomorrow instead of posting random pop culture lists. But, also like all true Americans, we wanted to celebrate this great nation in a way that required absolutely zero sacrifice from ourselves, except a little time on the internet. Hence today, the list that follows is made up of seven characters that personify the American spirit in pop culture—from comic books to television to movies. That spirit isn't always pretty, loving or even necessarily kind, but it will always kick ass in spectacular ways, much like the combination of grilled meat, illegal fireworks, and lite beer.
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7) Colonel Flagg / Colonel Hogan (tie)
These two American colonels were two sides of the same coin—both resourceful, both pretty effective, and both pretty funny to watch. The difference was that Colonel Hogan (Hogan’s Heroes) was the “gentle” American—you know, kind to the nice Nazis, quick with a joke, a secret penchant for amateur porn, all that. Colonel Flagg (MASH) was the “rabid” American—suspicious of everyone, self-destructive in his zeal, something of a fervent buffoon, and a secret fetish for German porn. Ah, porn—it’s the thing that brings all Americans together, in the end.
6) Ernest Hemingway
It’s maybe ironic that one of the most American of American writers was a guy that preferred to live overseas so much. But maybe that’s why he’s known as American—because he was our cultural ambassador all over the world: Cuba, Africa, Europe. But Hemingway was more than just a good writer or a fucked-up drunk. He was also a guy who came to embody the American spirit, up to and including the point at which he shot himself in the face. His last words were directed, perhaps presciently, at the high school kids who would someday be forced to read and write about his works. “I wrote The Old Man and the Sea, not Moby Dick. Get it right, you little fucking bastards.” Good ol’ Papa.
5) Superman
Supes is one of the quintessential American heroes, to be sure. He’s been notably portrayed carrying the American flag, or with an American eagle majestically perched on his forearm. He always fought for “truth, justice, and the American way,” though recent movies have changed that to be more global. Which we all know is bullshit. Superman might protect the world, but he’s an American hero. He’s the best immigrant that America has ever seen, coming from a far-off land, honoring his birthplace while at the same time taking on the mantle of being an American with relish and without reservation. He’s taken it too far in the past, slapping “Japs” and encouraging all of us to do the same, but you know, wartime racism is just part of the big, complex quilt we call America. And everyone is welcome under that quilt, unless, you know, you’re the current subject of that whole wartime racism bugaboo.
4) Sam the Eagle
Speaking of eagles, Sam is one eagle who’d never stoop to demeaning himself by perching on Superman’s forearm. This is one muppet with distinct limits—so much so that he was made the Muppet Show’s censor. And he took that job seriously—very seriously. As evidenced by his praise of his favorite dancing team, Wayne and Wanda, for their “appropriateness,” Sam could sometimes have a stick up his butt. (No, that wasn’t meant as a muppet joke, but I guess it could be. Okay, count it.) And he might sound too much like Bert from Sesame Street. But you can be sure that under that blue felt beats the heart of a true American. (No, not Frank Oz's hand.)
3) John Rambo
Exactly how a mentally unstable war veteran became an American icon is a little complicated if you haven’t seen the movies—suffice it to say that it was both a product of the 1982 zeitgeist and Richard Crenna’s inherent evil. (And seriously, if you haven’t seen the movies—or at least the first two—then frankly you’ve not met the prerequisites for perusing this site. Please shut your browser, catch up on your reading and viewing lists, and return when you’re better prepared.) Suffice it to say this: the name “Rambo” means “violence” in Japanese. This is all you need to know about what it took to be an American movie hero in 1982.
2) John Wayne
Sure, John Wayne was an actor, but he was also a character. After all, he was born Marion Morrison. And people went to see his movies not because they were good (because they sometimes weren’t), but because John Wayne was in them. There’s a reason that Jesse Custer from Preacher saw the ghost of John Wayne, and it wasn’t because Wayne was a great actor—it’s because he defined what it meant to be an American man. His tombstone reads: Ugly, Strong, and Serious. That’s John Wayne’s America. (Of course, that epitaph is actually written in Spanish, but please ignore that for the purposes of this entry. Thank you.)
1) Captain America
Who but Cap could end this list? Sure, some argue that Superman is the more representative of the two comic-book heroes (hell, I argued that point four entries ago, but I was full of shit, to be honest), but really, Captain America wears his patriotism on his sleeve—literally. The guy is wearing the freakin’ flag. He has an A on his forehead (and it doesn’t stand for France!) His name is Captain America. What more do you need? Cap doesn’t just stand for the American ideal; he fucking lives it, everyday, openly. Which, of course, means that he got shot and died. That happens to American heroes more than you might expect. But it’s like the song says: when Captain America throws his mighty shield…all those who chose to oppose his shield must yield. When he’s led to a fight and a duel is due, then the red and the white and the blue’ll come through. When Captain America throws his mighty shield. But perhaps Trey Parker and Matt Stone paraphrased it best in their film Team America: World Police. America—Fuck, yeah!
Comments
Just watched Rambo on Blu-ray last night, and I liked it quite a bit. Good old fashioned violent action.
I think Hulk Hogan probably deserves an honorable mention, given his 'Real American' theme song, handlebar stache, steroid physique and grotesque orange tan-spray complexion. The man's a walking stereotype fer chrissakes!
Posted 07/03/2008 at 06:47:38 AMSpot on with Rambo. I never got how he became an American icon. He was supposed to kill himself in the end. What a different world that would be.
But I do love his speech at the end.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 07:15:20 AMI second the motion to get Hulk Hogan added to this list. He always used to carry the American Flag out to the ring with him and even fought Sgt. Slaughter when he became an Iraqi turncoat (which is so stupid I usually tend to forget that ever happened, the Sarge is the only real life GI Joe and so will always be my hero). Hogan also taught a generation of American kids to "do their training, say their prayers and eat their vitamins". You can't get much more cheesy American than that.
And how Rambo became an American icon is no mystery. He's made of 100% pure awesome.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 08:42:51 AMpshaw ! I was glad to see ol papa on there but wow...not even a single mention of the Gonz ?
Posted 07/03/2008 at 08:47:53 AMNot to give the man more power than he already has, but...Chuck Norris? Who repelled the Invasion: USA? Who was a proud member of the Texas Rangers? Whose support do presidential candidates seek out?
Like America, Norris doesn't sleep...he waits.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 08:50:35 AMNico - Do you mean gonzo journalist Hunter S. Thompson, or Gonzo the Muppet? I don't see how either warrants inclusion.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 08:53:45 AMYou know who else always carried the American flag? Hacksaw Jim Duggan.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 08:58:04 AMWhat about GWB? He should be at number 1 man.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 10:14:45 AMI give props to any article that mentions Sam the Eagle. Right on!
Posted 07/03/2008 at 10:41:11 AMWTF? Rocky should really be on this list.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 10:55:41 AMHave to play Devil's Advocate here. There's no way John Rambo represents America, except maybe to people who hate America (like the French, which explains why Stallone is more popular in Europe than he is in America). The Rambo movies propagate the belief that serving one's country in the military transforms normal men into shellshocked, homicidal retards fit only for mass killings and incapable of re-integrating into society. Besides, the original Rambo film, First Blood, was based on a novel in which Rambo was NOT the hero, but the menace. And he dies in the end.
Any character played by John Wayne (including Genghis Khan in The Conqueror) could have wiped his ass with Rambo. So could Hemingway.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 11:32:36 AM@ The Shadow:
You are correct sir! You don't get any harder than The Duke or Hemingway. Two of the baddest mugs to ever live.
Great list Teague. Great move adding Colonel Hogan!
There is nothing more American than a love of porn, and don't we all have a secret penchant for porn?
Happy Fourth y'all!
Posted 07/03/2008 at 12:36:38 PMBates and the Shadow (which sounds like a great movie uu better than 'The Ghost and the Darkness, anyway) are right. Rocky is an American hero, who's defeated Russians, Hulk Hogan and numerous black people. (Which raises the question -- why isn't Mr. T on here? Mr. T is awesome.) And while Rambo is a broken man who can't let go of war, he represents America whether we want him to or not. Sad, really.
Posted 07/03/2008 at 01:49:17 PMJust a reminder that the Superman character was created by an American (Shuster) and a CANADIAN (Siegel). So technically he is only half.
For all you fellow Canadians go to the link and enjoy "A part of our heritage" :)
Posted 07/03/2008 at 09:09:04 PMhttp://youtube.com/watch?v=D9GYWbhBoHM
Superman invented by 2 Canadian brothers and Rambo 1st blood was filmed in Hope B.C Canada...
Posted 07/04/2008 at 12:29:00 AMThe criteria for this stroll down our collective memories is: seven characters that personify the American spirit in pop culture—from comic books to television to movies. That spirit isn't always pretty, loving or even necessarily kind, but it will always kick ass in spectacular ways, much like the combination of grilled meat, illegal fireworks, and lite beer.
Yet no women????
Is the essence of the American spirit only male? If that's the case this red blooded male is going where the chicks are at, the rest of you homos can stay here comparing sizes.
Posted 07/04/2008 at 12:46:52 AMsupermans a canadian lol
Posted 07/04/2008 at 12:57:56 AMyou missed Arthur Fonzarelli. Give the Fonz some all american icon love.
Posted 07/04/2008 at 01:11:25 AMSam the Eagle is awesome. But Superman was created by a Canadian, who teamed up with an American to get the comics published so I disagree with Superman.
I'd say spiderman should be replaced.
Posted 07/04/2008 at 01:33:48 AMHunter S. Thompson was pure America, America is probably the most medicated, and gonzo nation on Earth. He embodied the nitromethane powered, "in your face" race to new levels of excess. We all love shattering the mundane and substituting our own version of reality. His quote about chasing someone like a rat across the tundra would have got a thumbs up from most of the people on the list. Maybe I am the only one here who was born before he was hanging out with the Hell's Angels. So I may be biased...
Posted 07/04/2008 at 02:47:52 AMThis list was compiled by an Americain, here would be mine:
Posted 07/04/2008 at 03:29:39 AM-Ronald McDonald
-That ugly guy on that MAD cover
-Rambo (indeed)
-Lyndie England
-Paul Newman (as seen on his salad dressing'bottles) or Britney Spears (as seen bald, fat and drunk)
-The Pope (even though he' not: he's quintessentially biggot and nasty to be Americaner than most of youse)
-Geronimo (who's more Skull'n Bones than him?)
Where is Charles Manson?
Disappointing.
Posted 07/04/2008 at 03:40:09 AMI have to call BS on John Wayne being on this list.Wayne may be the quintessential cinematic cowboy/soldier. But he knew nothing of real heroism.
While other action heroes of the time put their careers on hold to actually serve in the military (Tyrone Power, James Stewart... even Humphrey Bogart tried to enlist though he was turned down because of age and health restrictions), The Duke was safely at the studio... making war movies, just like that other great patriot Ronald Reagan.
In fact, the only difference between the two is that The Duke had enouth decency never to do a musical.
Posted 07/04/2008 at 09:12:19 AM
Posted 07/04/2008 at 12:59:12 PMI was expecting Elvis to be on the list
How have none of you mentioned Steven Colbert?! I expected him to be at least #3 on the list!
Posted 07/30/2008 at 07:12:50 PM