Have you felt...weird, recently? Anxious? Upset? Have you had a bad feeling about this? Chances are, your brain is desperately trying to protect you from the knowledge that the CG Clone Wars movie is opening this Friday. Warner Bros. has embargoed most review until the movie opens (always a good sign), but if you thought that Anakin's padawan Ahsoka was going to be the worst part of the flick, please think again. Now, by all reports, Ahsoka is headstrong, spunky, sassy, and may very well say "Oh, snap!" at one point. But meet this guy:
He's Ziro the Hutt—Jabba's uncle and a flaming homosexual. For reals. Oh, and he speaks English, unlike every other Hutt shown in Star Wars so far, to better allow him to talk in outrageous lisp/southern drawl, a la Truman Capote. Sez MTV:
He’s a purple Hutt, bedazzling in sky blue tattoos, a peacock feather nestled behind his rumbled head, a character “Empire Online” called “a cross-dressing pimp” who holds court in “Downtown Coruscant.” He’s sure to be the most talked about new character in the entire Republic when “Star Wars: The Clone Wars” is released August 15. Jabba’s uncle, Zero the Hutt, a new character introduced specifically for the upcoming animated series, is a gay stereotype that makes what Jar Jar Binks represented to the island of Jamaica look subtle by comparison. It’s not the look or design that pushes it over the top into stereotype, of course, but the voice (performed by Corey Burden), a lispy, high-pitched twang purposively reminiscent of Truman Capote.
MTV goes on to say Lucas insisted on Ziro speaking English and his incredible voice. You know, I've bitched in the past about how Tatooine and Jabba show back up, yet again, in Clone Wars as evidence that Lucas isn't creative. I take it back. It's that Lucas' new original ideas are the worst fucking ideas ever. I'll take another awkward, forced Boba Fett storyline anyday. (Via FilmDrunk)
24 comments
Comments
cummins said:
Jesus.
Strangeman said:
This would explain why Jabba overcompensates with the slave-girls...
scott said:
The Lucas is just getting us back for trashing Episodes 1-3.
Teague said:
Every time it seems Lucas has sunk as far as he can go...
He. Just. Keeps. Digging.
Hal Stevens said:
It's true. About the voice at least. I was at a screening in Atlanta monday. Several of the 501st Storm Troopers were present as well. Ziro/Zero was flamboyant but not in a homosexual way. Just a bit over the top. The southern drawl and lisp were a bit disconcerting at first but it grew on you. Jabba understands Standard (English) but speaks Hutt. Why is it so unbelievable that a Hutt could speak Standard? I think it was the timbre of the voice, higher, clear and not as raspy as one would expect. The voice got some chuckles every time it was heard. It was THAT more than the voice itself that pulled you out of the moment. There's not a lot of Ziro/Zero , so it's okay to hold your breath. You won't die. BTW... Ziro is much easier to take than two hours of Jar Jar. Oh, yeah, his photo-luminescent tattoos rock, reminded me of the TRON suits a little. Live Long & Prosper.
Cartoons In Bed said:
That's about right. Lucas is just so insulated by suck-ups that will never just say to him "hey, that's not so great, George, let's try this instead" that he must think whatever he comes up with is gold.
And because fans (you poor guys) generated a billion at the box office for the hideous prequels, it just confirms it for him.
Again, better to have checked out of this universe in 1999 when ep 1 came out. All was lost then, I'm afraid.
Templar said:
Life is good.
Jesse said:
If I've said it once, I've said it 1,000 times:
Please bring back Genndy Tartakovsky. For the luvva God.
Paul said:
I love how people are hating on this without having seen it. I don't expect much more than a fun adventure, not fricken Godfather.
Someone said:
Go to hell, Paul. This movie is nothing more than Lucas cashing in on the franchise again. There's no doubt it'll make him some good money. But there's also no doubt it's going to suck big fat donkey balls.
scott said:
I would probably wait for this movie on DVD myself, but my kid will love it, so we're going.
plush_cthulhu said:
Actually, it didn't suck.
Sure, it wasn't brilliant - it was no 'Empire Strikes Back' but I think it was better than Episode One.
(My opinion, of course, remember, we're allowed to have opinions.)
Neal Snow said:
It's gonna be another big shit sandwich, mark my words.
Zach said:
I'm not going to see it, because I know how it ends. (Cough darthvader cough)
Purple Monkey Dishwasher said:
I POKE BADGERS WITH SPOONS
Dylan H. said:
I poke weasels with forks. :P
zohner said:
I went to an advanced screening on Saturday. What's up with this character? It's like Lucas was doing some bad drugs and nobody said that it was a stupid idea. I'm fine with the idea of introducing Jabba's uncle but the way that it was done is absolutely awful. George Lucas really needs to stop surrounding himself with yes-men and get somebody on staff that has some balls and common sense.
Toxic said:
Go to youtube, find clips from the Holiday Special.
Lucas was always a total bozo. The real surprise is that he managed to contain it for the first 3 movies, not that this is happening.
Paul said:
So someone (literally) tells me to go to hell because I think people are being too hard on a cartoon made for kids? Let's get some perspective here.
Templar said:
George Lucas really needs to stop surrounding himself with yes-men and get somebody on staff that has some balls and common sense.
Oh, I don't know if there's any need for someone with "balls"... I mean, given the widespread outraged petulance in reaction, it would seem that introducing a flamboyant, sexually ambiguous Hutt was a pretty ballsy move on Lucas's part. ;)
andy said:
yep, just saw it today, and it sucked balls. I'll go to the original 2d clone wars, any day..
Mike said:
I watched Clone Wars today on Blue-Ray, and I for the life of me, can't see why everyone hated this movie so much. I thought it was pretty damn awesome. I mean, it's the setup for a show that comes on Cartoon Network, for criminy's sake...but it still show people dieing left and right, and in some pretty brutal ways, too.
SO far, the Clone Wars has been simply top-notch as far as I'm concerned, both in animation and music. I think people bitch too much.
jenee said:
I was so excited to see this movie! I sat down, I started munching on popcorn and then...it started...
THE HORROR!!!
It sucked sooo much! I knew it was going to suck but then I thought "Oh, just give it a damn try..."
So this is what I get for paying 8.98?!?!?
Hey, George Fatneck Lucas!!! gimme my damn fuckin money back!!!
Has Lucas gone mad or just turned gay?!?!?
Seriosuly, dont stand up for this piece of shit by saying "its ur opinion" and that it was good...
My friends kids tried to throw popcorn at the screen!!!
They cupped their hands around their mouths and said "Booo!!!"
One of them is 6, the other is 10 and the other is 8...
if KIDS say this sucks its true...
Do we REALLY want Lucas to do this??!?!
u lik this frikin movie?!@!?? go to hell u bitches!!!
jjjj said:
I know some of u homos are trying to stand up for your kids but come on!!!
This movie was a piece of shit and u know it!!!
*my pals kids threw popcorn at the screen...*
