Fox Ready to Air, Fail to Promote, and Immediately Cancel U.S. Version of Torchwood

By Rob Bricken in TV
Tuesday, Jan. 19 2010 @ 2:00PM
torchwood-threeshot18.jpg
FOX. NO. FUCK FUCKING NO. From THR:
Exclusive: Huge news for sci-fi fans: Fox is developing a stateside version of the U.K. hit series "Torchwood." The project is from BBC Worldwide Prods., with original series creator Russell Davies writing the script.

A more straight-faced spinoff of "Doctor Who," "Torchwood" is about a covert group that investigates and fights alien activity. Two series aired domestically on BBC America as well as last year's well reviewed stand-alone miniseries, "Children of Earth," which broke all ratings records for the network. ...

Unlike U.S. adaptations that have gone awry, "Torchwood" fans can take comfort that the original producing team is on board. In addition to Davies, exec producers include Davies' producing partner Julie Gardner (former head of drama at BBC Wales for the show's first season) and Jane Tranter (another BBC vet, now exec VP programming and production at BBC Worldwide Prods. in the U.S.).

Also, some of the current cast -- most likely John Barrowman, who plays the immortal Capt. Jack Harkness -- might star if Fox orders "Torchwood" to pilot.

As for the new show's plot, the U.S. version will contain a global story line compared to the more localized sensibility of the first two BBC seasons.

AAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH. Here is why this is a tremendously stupid idea:

1) It's Fox.
2) Torchwood is a Doctor Who spin-off. Doctor Who for all intents and purposes does not air in America.
3) Fox.
4) Torchwood succeeds on BBC; it will fail on Fox.
5) Because it's fucking Fox.
6) Even if the U.S. version keeps John Barrowman -- which is no guarantee -- I'll be shocked if they keep Gwen. Torchwood will lose most of its original flavor. And if they do keep Gwen, she'll be relegated to a peripheral character so there can be some blond American bimbo as the female lead.
7) FOX
8) When it fails on Fox, there's no guarantee it'll be able to come back to BBC. Fox might destroy Torchwood forever.
9) FOOOOOOOOXXXXXXXXXXX

There's a lot of Torchwood haters out there, and I admit, the first season was pretty crap. I haven't seen the second season yet, but Children of Earth -- the third season/mini-series -- was honestly some of the best sci-fi I've seen on TV in years. There's just no way Fox will not destroy Torchwood by this. Fuuuuuuuuucccccccckkkkkkkkkkkkk.