Oh, So Now Mario Finds a Cloud Suit
Goddammit. I don’t want to talk about how fun Super Mario Galaxy 2 looks. I don’t want to discuss how adorable Mario’s Cloud Suit looks either. What I want to talk about is HOW, AFTER 25+ YEARS OF SUPER MARIO BROS. GAMES, IT IS ONLY IN 2010 THAT MARIO GETS A SUIT THAT MAKES FUCKING PLATFORMS. Seriously, Nintendo? I’ve fallen in every single fucking hole in every single fucking Super Mario game at least twice, and only now do you decide that maybe a suit that makes a fucking platform is a good idea? ARRRGH. This is like Capcom telling Ryu in Street Fighter IV, “Oh, I’m sorry. I meant to give you this assault rifle back in 1991. Hope it helps!”
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.