• Is there any way someone can start an internet petition against Bay's involvement? Cuz I can get like twenty people to sign it...

• The year is 3000. The immortal turtles must return to the past to stop splinter from taking a dump behind a chuck E cheese(where he is currently employed mascot). After splinter returns to work an Arab named Sir'hredd Irr will slip in the shit and fall in the dumpster which contains the mutagen that transforms him into Suu'pahh Sir'hredd Irr.

• No... NOOOOOOO!!!! FUCK ME WITH A RED HOT POKER!!!!! He's already shit all over one of my beloved franchises... now he's gonna do it again?!?!?!? FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!

• That's it, I'm going to kill him, Michael Bay is a dead man.

• The Fallen wasn't created in the 80s, but he existed before Bay ever got his hands on the franchise. He was introduced in the War Within comics. Of course, he never was Megatron's boss (Megatron was MIA when The Fallen appeared), so you can still blame that on Bay.

• Hate on the anime all you want but the toys that came out of that were fucking awesome.

• This is just second step in Micheal Bay's quest to destroy every chilhood icon that ever existed. Next he'll be targetting Reboot, Thundercats and Mr. T who will be played by Ice Cube. Somebody mentioned Uwe Boll's name earlier and it reminded ne of the episode of Entourage when they tell Vince that Micheal Bay is raking over as director of Aquaman 2 with Brett Ratner writting the script. Can you imagine if Micheal Bay as producer got Uwe Boll to direct and Brett Ratner to write the screenplay? Methinks the world would be destroyed by the fallout of this true, true Axis of Eeeeeeevillll!!!!!!

• You forgot * Krang will not be in this movie

• They will hire a terrible band to cover the TMNT theme song, like they had Mute Math do the Transformers theme.

• Is Bay becoming the american version of Uwe Bol?

• He has a small production company based in Osaka.

• shut up

• fuck your childhood

• This is intresting because Plantinum Dunes have only made remakes of Horror films, so this is outside the norm for them. I liked Elm Street(Much better than alot of those late Freddy films)and Amityville Horror from the company and I thought Friday the 13th was alright. It depends on who's writing and directing, how the film will look and feel, also how much Bay has input in it. I do suspect a hot April O' Neil, but fuck that, I like my yellow jumpsuit wearing bitch to be hot.

• If every person that hated Bay donated a dollar to the cause...we'd be paying way to much.

• Fuck this!

• Because Michael Bay has Damien Thorne-like powers. Anyone who tries to get near enough to kill him dies in a bizarre 'accident'.

• Haha, funny list and disturbing because it's pretty much what PD might do.

• Why hasn't a fanboy murdered Michael Bay in a fit of Pique and Rage yet? I ask you, WHY?

• If nothing else, the late '80s cartoon that fanboys used to revile for not being gritty enough will suddenly look a fuck lot better to them.

• Wow. I never knew Satan made anime.

• SEE?!? EVIL! Great huge fat buttery slabs of evil!

• Don't overlook the fact that while one or indeed all of the turtles will have a crush on April - or if they want to be really edgy, Casy. - This ending will be rendered moot of course because an assistant will mention the fact that there was a female turtle.

• For the sake of directorial creative license, the Role of the Turtles AND the Foot Clan will be played by unidentifiable cg-induced piles of garbage that all talk like the kids from Jersey Shore and all look so similar you won't be able to tell them apart when they fight. Also, somehow Obama is going to use his socialist agenda to turn America against them. At least he'll try to...until tea-party-yojimbo [he's American now] shows up and not so subtly bitch slaps his face and then makes a dick joke. Doesn't make any sense? Don't worry it'll all come together in post-production. Don't forget about writing the Shredder out in favor of a NEW villain like "The Fallen"...wait, I don't remember him from the series or comics, oh right, directorial creative license. I wish Bay would choke on his own dick.

• Sweet Christmas, that is the only thing that could make the Twilight craze worse...

• Splinter will be a REALLY offensive asian stereotype, with squinty eyes, buck teeth and yellow fur to match. "Aw Herro Aplil, tha Turtles be locking and lolling to the music over there, ah so"

• Bebop and Rocksteady will be a pair of bumbling racist characters who have no idea how to read or speak in an intelligible language. And they will drive Skidz and Mudflap in the movie as an off the cuff tie-in to T3.

• This is just about as horrible as Uwe Bowels (sic).

• You forgot to mention the ludicrous amount of free explosions everywhere and the annoying self-celebrating presence of Bay's movies posters around the locations.

• I was actually thinking it would be Krang with the massive gonads

• dammit - you beat me to it!

• FUCK and NO!

• it was a fucking cartoon, idiot.

• you forgot to mention that splinter will hump april's leg, casey jones will die and go to turtle heaven, and the teenage mutant ninja turtle's theme song won't be in the movie.

• I think you are right. XD

• Just great another villain will be bay-ized and torn down to major shit. >_< Shredder doesnt stand an f-ing chance now.

• OH GOD PLEASE NO.] We seriously need to kill him, quick.

• i'm in...Is it so much to ask, A movie of michael bay exploding once and again? Just him, exploding...maybe a documentary?

• I am absolutely disgusted.

• Okay. In an effort to stave off my simmering nerd anxiety, I've reached a mental compromise. All the inevitable stupidity and gratuitous explosions and incomprehensible action sequences and military fellatiating and source material disregard and racism and juvenile humor and paper thin plot and unneccessarily long-run time (assuming the to-be-announced director is anything like sadly lucrative Bay) will be forgiven if for one non-negotiable sticking point: Christina Hendricks as April O'Neil Those are my terms

• That is...epic.

• you wanna know how this movie would be, see this http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DJGcvF0qfk

• Wait wait wait. Casey Jones will pass out/Die. Only to see his life in a Turtle Aquarium. /facepalm

• Call me crazy but I'm looking forward to this one..... wait..what the fuck did I just say?

• In addition to the flames painted on Leonardo's shell, Michealangello will be a mute, to make him 'cuter'.

• I predict giant turtle genitals in the sequel.

• The movie should just be named TNT...look forward to it being in 3D with lots of...EXPLOSIONS!

• Fuck and no... on the good side Cam Clarke might voice Leonardo...

• If you think this is bad news, I just heard Seltzer and Friedberg arer gearing up to make a 'Twilight' parody movie. Anyone else want to join me in a Jim Jones style kool-aid suicide party?

• John Turturro will be cast as Baxter Stockman and the turtles will piss on him

• Yes. The soundtrack will be Linkin Park.

• Haha, this.

• "Did I miss anything?" Humor.

• one should add. Michel will have the turtles junk massive and the main focuse of the film will be Casey johnes having to get something for the turtles to save the world from Shreeder who will look like the love child of megan fox and Richard Simmons.

• turtle testicals...you know they'll make a cameo.

• Considering Platinum Dunes' reputation, I'd prefer it if Bay was making it. This company is famous for remaking horror movies, cheaply and badly. They throw something together and rely on the name to draw people into the theaters. Will this be a typical Michael Bay movie filled with explosions, blurred and confused fighting, stupid and racist humor, and all those other things he's infamous for? No. But with the blandtastic crap that Platinum Dunes puts out, I almost wish it was.

• "April O'Neil will be his hot girlfriend who lives next door"? Hmmmm...more like the hot girlfriend will be named Allison Nils, not wear yellow, but will at one point pick up a camera. Fan favorite one-off character Mona Lisa WILL appear in the picture, but will have one line, and then be unceremoniously killed.

• We've lost guys...This prick is gonna make it his personal mission to destroy all the geek franchises one by one because he knows how much we hate him...He's not doing any of this for "his fans"...This mofo is on a quest to just swell us with hate as he laffs and laffs...What a bummer...

• Dude. Try imagining Megan Fox in the yellow jumpsuit, with a red dye-job. ...On second thoughts, I appear to be typing from Purgatory, so don't. Really.

• I will die laughing if Megan Fox is cast as April O'Neil.

• Oh FUCK no. ...If it turns out that Michael Bay has got a physical LIST of beloved franchises he intends to desecrate, well, I called it.

• Eh...I wanna know who directs before we go to crazy. Maybe we can get that black April we all(me) wanted!

• Hopefully it won't be worst than Ninja Turtles III.

• I really doubt the turtles will be in only 40% of the film, like it was in Transformers. Something tells me the Turtles won't eat into the CGI budget like the robots did.

• Good one. LOL Curse you Michael Bay! First your slaggin' Bayformers Now Teenage Mutant Ninja Baytles. [[insert expletive riddled diatribe.]] first Coleman dies,then I get this news. What a $***ty day this is turning into. =[

• Robot Chicken has all the keys to my heart.

• :(

• Leonardo will die and then come back to life with an even bluer bandana than before and with swords that cut through all substances. nothing will stop him as he kicks the crap out of the entire Foot clan 300 style with epic slow mo shots of heads flying everywhere. ...That's about it,I can't think of anything else.

• How the fuck does Michael Bay keep finding work??? Fist Transformers, Now TMNT...What other beloved show from my childhood will he rape next??? Thundercats?? Voltron? He-Man? The only way this could be any worse is if Michael Bay decided to let Uwe Boll co-produce this movie!

• Sure Star Trek was great...once you realize that it's just a generic action movie where the characters all have familiar names.

• If he's only producing it, there's a pretty good chance that it could be none of these things. Jeez guys, relax.

• *joins you*

• Oh let's not forget the "spend an eerie amount of time watching two dogs humping each other" scene.

• "Oh God, am I depressed!" *puts whipped cream can nozzle in her mouth and presses down*

• What's wrong with Splinter stepping up and actually fighting? Bebop and Rocksteady were human thugs at the beginning, if you remember.

• It will be shot using 3-D cameras. It will be 2 1/2 hours long. It will feature seizure-inducing fight scenes in which the hero and the villain are virtually indistinguishable. Casey Jones will make Jar Jar Binks look like Othello. April will be 19 but played by a 27 year old model chosen strictly because she's got a great rack in a tank top and she doesn't drool too badly while chewing her lines. Master Splinter will be less Yoda and more Jackie Chan. Be-Bop and Rocksteady will be regular human thugs. It will be AWFUL and hundreds of morons will berate you for hating on a 'fun, check-your-brain-at-the-door, summer popcorn flick'.

• There isn't a big enough "UGH!" to express my feelings on this.

• When shredder wakes up at the CIA ultra secret base: I AM SHREDDER!

• "The Turtles will use more ridiculous weapons and technology and possibly mutant powers than actual ninja techniques or weapons." You mean like all those action figure variants like Wild West Turtles, Military Turtles, and Superhero Turtles that fans don't seem to mind? Not to mention there's NO WAY to make something like the Turtle Blimp look not-retarded.

• It will take place in Egypt at some point. And there will be explosions. Hell, they'll probably blow up a pyramid.

• There's so much evil in the world. (I'm sorry, I read this after watching the goddamn snow leopard, I got nothin')

• No... NO.... NO!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!! I WANT TO KILL EVERYTHING THAT'S EVER BEEN ALIVE! CURSE YOU BAY! WHY CAN'T YOU KEEP YOUR GREASY HOLLYWOOD MONSTER LIPS OFF MY CHILDHOOD DREAMS! BURN IN HELL YOU BASTARD DICK!

• ..........................well, I hope April will be hot at least.

• For some reason a Queen song is playing in my head.... Something about biting the dust...hmmmmm

• This might be a rare case where the line, "Cowabunga" could actually save a movie.

• I counted myself out the moment I read Michael Bay.

• You beat me to it. :) I was going to say the same thing that all four turtles will look exactly alike except for some minor coloring. When they get into a battler, audiences will have no idea who's fighting who: all they'll see is a blur of green shells, a huge explosion and that's it. April will be played by the latest hot-actress-of-the-day until she bad-mouths Bay and gets replaced by a Victoria Secrets model.

• Yet oddly, Star Trek was lots of fun.

• I predict that Casey will start the movie as some form of teen vigilantie ala Kickass. Splinter will be his bumbling Kung Fu obsessed father who has no idea whats going on and will mostly serve as the comic relief. 40 minutes in, the turtles will be introduced and Splinter will be turned into a rat somehow. At the climax, Spliter will give Casey and the turtles some dramatic speach and Casey will rescue April from the hands of his jerk jock rival turned supervillan, Shredder.

• You're giving way too much credit to any connection to the original. There will be no April or Casey. There will be Six Ninja Turtles, all their names will be puns for genetalia. But they won't be ninjas, or turtles, or teenagers or mutants. They'll be oh... lets say cyborgs. And it will be on a submarine. In space.

• That's an awful contest idea. Every entry would be the same. Basically a mad lib of rob's description with the name of the property and characters. Yawn.

• What you said. Frankly i think what he described sounds like a pretty bad ass movie.

• The turtles won't in any way resemble the turtles we know from any previous incarnation, except for Leonardo, who will just have prominent blue coloring (but with flames!). The rest will be indistinguishable from each other, with no previously associated color or weapon for any discernible reason (again, except for Leo, who will have his Katana), and all will have inexplicable spikey looks to them (except for Shredder, who oddly does not). Hmmm. This sounds like another TR contest: Bay-ify your favorite property.

• it couldn't be half as bad as mcg's Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle, right? ....right? i predict they'll be in front of green screens and on wires for most of their physical stunts. bleh. and yes, there'll be military, lots and lots of military, at the very least, flares. you ever notice how it takes only seconds for the Baymilitary to send a spy plane to the action going on anywhere, get the intel, and then send cargo/attack planes to the sight? the Baymilitary gets there almost before the spontaneous fight even starts.

• Maybe next Bay and JJ Abrams will team up to do the exploding lens flare movie

• Sigh. Childhood being raped, etc etc. If we can get enough people to kick in, couldn't we get Bay killed or something? Even if it's just a dollar each.

• Don't forget the chase scene.....very important. And in the middle of the chase any one of these things will happen----water will be hit with huge splash, glass will be broken, somebody will almost get hit before they leap/get pushed/trip out of the way.

• AHAHAHA! IT'S FUNNY BECAUSE YOU DON'T LIKE MICHAEL BAY! HAHAHA!

• You forgot to add that the Turtles will be totally unrecognizable, and that every scene with them fighting will induce seizures

• NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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