• Kevin Smith is a worthless juvenile douchenugget. We're talking about a man who forged a cult following repeating the same joke in every movie. This is a man who was asked to get people to raise money for Breast Cancer research, and did so by making jokes about how we should all save the titties so men can pearl necklace them. So classy. Then when I unfollowed him with a VERY polite "I'll follow again tomorrow, today you're filling my feed with stuff I don't need to see given I'm undergoing screening for Breast Cancer and would rather not be picturing men jizzing on me during my mammogram". His reaction? His sicked his other twitter followers on me. My PC actually crashed from trying to keep up with the flood of tweets hitting my Mentions calling me everything from a dry-pussied lesbo cunt to an uptight breast-hating feminazi, all because I POLITELY declined to read him making cumshot jokes on Twitter about breast cancer awareness. I therefore disregard ANYTHING he's written. Batman did NOT piss himself during Year One. EVER. PERIOD. Fuck Kevin Smith right up his fat misogynist ass.

• "He'd plan for it." And if not he'd certainly NEVER admit to it, but instead take it to his grave! lawls

• So let me get this straight somebody writes what has generally been called an awesome addition to the Batman story and you are going to for lack of a better term piss all over it because of one small line of text... Its not like he came out of the closet, it was simply a very human reaction get over it....

• And this is a problem because?

• You have been fucking Kevin Smith?

• Yes, because that's why nerds come to this website. To practice shutting the fuck up.

• Look, everyone relax. Smith has always written things like this, if you don't like it or him don't read it. Smith is the consummate potty mouthed ten year old with an ability to humanize that is pretty spot on. This one is a bit of a failure to be sure but it is nothing to get hysterical over. ALSO This is not ACTUAL history. Geeks like us get a bad rap because we get to serious about things like this. If being a nerd means over reacting to ONE comic by ONE man than I would rather not take part anymore.

• Whose responsible this.

• So the best response to a stupid joke is more stupid jokes? Interesting. And didn't you hear? My nerd license has been revoked. You'll have to come up with another one (though I don't know how you're going to top that).

• I think it's funny. I could believe Batman pissed his pants on a mission. Shit can get scary.

• Damn Kevin. Please keep the childish bullshit for Jay and SIlent Bob. WTF.

• How long has it been since "Clerks" came out? Why is he still around?

• The fridging of Bats' girlfriend bothers me WAY more than the peepee. Although the peepee is very much something Garth Ennis would write. Kevin Smith should start writing for Dynamite and leave existing superheroes alone.

• Also, for the record, my name is Timothy, so I found the South Park character amusing. Plus, I have no clue what Lil' John is.

• Yes, I am a nerd. The biggest non-japanophile one I know, but I really enjoy Kevin Smith's work, and take some offense to him being mocked. I also, to a certain extent (GL and Superman are far better), enjoy Batman, but it's just a stupid comic book, so I find it funny when people get so up in arms about it. So nerd, yes I am one, but Batman fanboy, no. I hope to piss on your headstone, Leroy.

• This is what I'm saying. If it was throwing up no one would have batted an eye. Peeing a little presumably happens from time to time in situations like that.

• I'll say the same thing I said over at ComicsAlliance: I don't blame Kevin Smith for this- I blame the multiple levels of editors that allowed this to see print. How many people oversaw this and not one of them said it was a bad idea to retcon a scene from "Year One"? How many editors does DC have, especially for the Batman titles? I would think they would do everything in their power to make sure every comic and every appearance in every title fits nicely within the "Batman character". It would be interesting to see how many times a Batman appearance wasn't approved in a certain book because "Batman doesn't say things like that", yet the editors allowed this dialog to see publication. It's like blaming a child for playing with a loaded gun when the parents should have kept it unloaded or locked it up so the kid couldn't get to it.

• I use to be such a huge Kevin Smith fan. Until "Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back," came out and killed every once of love I had for him. Now everything he does just ruins my day.

• look at you trying to do a horrible little Kevvy Smith routine of your own. how cute. (you're still a "fanboi" if you're in love with Kevin Smith instead of Batman)

• Leave it to Smith to take all the "cool" out of comics and bring them down to 4th-grade puerile humor. Not even funny, 4th-grade puerile humor.

• Yet you waste your time commenting on the merits of histrionics and call people hysteric and idiotic for coming up with their own jokes to this silliness. YOU get over yourself, nerd.

• Holy crapping fly cow. I understand about trying to bring out a more human side of batman... But this is just cheap joke! On a slightly unrelated topic. Did anyone around here read the Green Hornet (and Kato) books that are also written by Kevin Smith? Are they any better (or worst) than his Batman stuff?

• That's interesting. Would it have been better if he'd said he threw up? If so, why? I'm pretty certain I've seen the odd panel with a superhero barfing (if not Batman...I certainly can't recall an instance of him doing that).

• Why is DC trying to destroy Batman? The Bruce Wayne garbage, the endless extra characters 'Defending' Gotham and now this. It's like they saw how Marvel made Spider-Man unreadable and now want to follow that strategy. So when you go out to kill Kevin Smith, please stop by and shoot Dan Dildo...Doodoo...whatever the hell his name is.

• I said after "Mallrats" we need to KILL Kevin Smith. I warned you all.

• According to webMD bladder spasms can be the result of recent injury or trauma. At that point just about everyone in Gotham had kicked the crap out of Batman, so it could be the sudden jarring sensation coupled with the injury would have caused an accident. And really, the fact that he didn't break character, didn't stop and look down or even react kind of adds to the moment doesn't it? That's how committed he was to the mission he chose. Thirdly haven't heard about stuff like this at one time or another? From real EMTs, firemen, soldiers or police who reacted to an extremely stressful moment? What if he vomited afterward? Would that have really and truly been any different?

• Fanboys? You're the one named after a "South Park" joke that died a miserable death at least four years ago, alongside the wretched "WHAT?! O-KAY!!!" of Lil' John. Get over yourself. You're on a nerd website, speaking with nerds. You're a nerd. Done.

• Personally, I think all you fanboys should shut the fuck up!

• I think the same. Smith´s Batman doesn´t sound like batman for me. And let´s face it, if Batman peed himself he would deny it xD

• I guess he thought he was being funny and/or edgy. But way to shit all over a classic Batman moment. The DC editorial team are at fault for letting this crap get by. It's a cheap gag, but the kind of one I'd expect to see if I were reading a high school kid's Batman fan-fiction piece. I couldn't finish Kevin Smith's last Batman storyline. It was written so poorly, he made it all feel swarmy. I avoided his second attempt, and judging by this page, I'm really glad that I did. He's done some decent comic work before. Put him on Howard the Duck or something...

• That happened. It was called "Knightfall" and the fact that he recovered from a snapped spine made him all the more fuckin' badass than before.

• Like stan lee fed off of kirby and everyone he worked with and took all the credit?

• Just imagine if the Joker hadn't said "where does he get those wonderful toys?" and instead said, "Hey . . .did you guys smell something when he came in?" Totally changes the tone of the movie.

• So was Mallrats, ha ha

• I think the healthiest way to look at this is that yes, it's really stupid, and yes, Kevin Smith is going down in flames as a writer and a person, but who cares? Fiction is fiction, and because of that, you can ignore what you want. Unless bladder control becomes Batman's new fatal flaw, which I find extremely unlikely, it will never be mentioned again. Personally, I'd like to see Batman get taken down a peg or two, but instead of having him lose control of his bodily functions, why not just let him lose a fight once in awhile?

• A-fucking-men. Fanbois are funny. Rob, you know posting this you're probably responsible for no less than thirty nerd-aneurysms. Really guys? You don't think the Bat has ever pissed himself?! REALLY?! Think about it: doing high impact caped-crusading, hiding and doing stake outs for hours, motherfucker is ALWAYS in that latex or rubber or fuckin goretex batsuit, do you really think he always has time to remove the suit, find a 7-11, borrow the bathroom key, etc? No. To quote Goldbloom from JP 1: when you gotta go, you gotta go. I am surprised Mr. Always Prepared hasn't thought of Bat-diapers? Goodnites mean good mornings, don't they Bats? Fanbois need to chill out and not read it if it shatters your world. If I started foaming at the mouth over every "canon" bullshit Spiderman arc, I'd be made of literally nothing but foam. Next source of nerd-rage plzthx!

• I'm sorry, but if somebody tries to inspire me by lying that he peed himself this one time (unless I'm nervous about a bladder control problem myself, in which case it would be appropriate), I'm fairly certain I wouldn't be inspired. I'd be uncomfortable. I'd be wondering if he was peeing himself right then and there. This is Batman. Do I think I could tell when he was peeing himself? I'm not sure I could. I bet he wouldn't even blink when he was doing it. If he's been peeing himself since he started the hero game, he has got to be good at it now. This is what that kind of lie does. This is probably why I'm not a superhero.

• Sorry, but no, this is NOT the worst moment in comics of all time. It's not even the worst moment in Batman comics of all time. This is a comment made to humanize and humorize a character who's become so invincible that nothing can destroy him, which is always the reason given by people who don't like Superman. This is not a moment that can only be fixed by a two year retcon of a 23 year old event. This is also not a moment that can only be counteracted by Batman making a deal with a devil. This is not a moment that takes a whiny bitch punching on an energy wall and reverberations making continuity shifts. So all humorous hyperbole aside, no, this is NOT the worst moment in comics. Take a chill pill and read any of the other 20 Batman comics out there if you don't like this one.

• Yeah, I'm with you. When you get right down to it, Spider-Man and The Thing are probably the most "human" superheroes we have, and it never really crossed my mind that they can't control their bladders. And if Robin is generally there to humanize Batman a bit, does that mean that he's just running around, dripping like a leaky faucet? I just can't get behind this whole "peeing himself humanizes him" thing at all. (And I fully admit that I'm turning the argument into a bit of a strawman, but straw is pretty good at soaking up urine, so I'm okay with that.)

• Not that it excuses the rest of the plot, but Baphomet and Batman didn't just meet. They've known each other for quite a while at that point in the story.

• Well if histrionics are required for a nerd license, then you can have it. Twilight is lame, but I don't waste my time trying to impress strangers by coming up with a pithy little put down about it. Does that count as endorsing it?

• My panties may be in a twist, but they're not pee-stained. Apparently that puts me one up on Kevin Smith's Batman.

• I don't think it's that everyone expects Batman to be Grim 'n' Gritty, I think it's more that everyone expects Batman to have better bladder control than he does in this comic. I mean, two days ago, if you asked me "Has Batman ever peed himself in costume?" I would have said no. Not because it ruins his dark persona, but because why would I ever think he did? Anyway, until you show me a silver age story about The Case of the Golden Showers or something, I'm going to say that Batman peeing himself doesn't really equate to Rainbow Batman.

• They weren't "rich people". They were criminals who had gotten rich by corrupting the police, running rackets, and all other 30s gangsta shit. And technically, it was Frank Miller who wrote it. Smith is just referencing it. Scope out the original story in Batman: Year One.

• "Online fans are a cowardly fickle lot. So my writing must be able to strike nerd rage into their hearts. I must write the creature of the night, humanize him, make them think it's terrible because it's against what they want..." And as if in answer, a toilet flushes... "Piss! That's it! It's an omen! I will make Batman piss himself!"

• I like how everyone assumes Batman is telling the truth. I don't know the context here, but I wouldn't put it past ol' Batsy to spin a little white lie if it inspired some other do-gooder. Even if it wasn't a lie, this is talking about when Batman was a rookie. He was one of the very first people to take up a mask and do crime-fighting. I think you have the right to piss yourself in your first pyrotechnics gig dressed as the thing you fear most in front of the most dangerous men of Gotham, especially if you have no idea whether or not it will work.

• "Plain and simple, I fucking Kevin Smith. He always writes the stupidest stories." At least he can complete a thought.

• Ah, to be a fly on the wall when Frank Miller hears about it...

• This shit is not in cannon; DC stories are only cannon if Dan Didio descends from Mt. Sinai and decrees so. I have heard no such thing from Dan.

• I fail to see the relation with "humanity". I mean, I've had stressful moments in my life and I think I peed myself last when I was like 5 years old. Even Nicolas Cage characters don't pee themselves. Anyway, I don't think this thing's frustrating, it's just bad.

• I think what Kevin Smith was trying to do was work out exactly how much impotent internet nerd rage is needed to meet civilisation's energy requirements. Judging by the comments I think he's managed to generate 3.59 MegaVegases.

• hey chasing amy was great

• To hide his do-rag, obviously.

• That may actually be a completely accurate summary of Smith's writing process for The Widening Gyre. How horrible.

• Oh man... thanks for that. I haven't laughed that hard in a few weeks... :)

• I was gonna write a good issue of Batman But then I got high (OooooOOOOooooo) He was gonna whoop on Joker's ass But then I got high (LaaaDaDaDaaaaaaa) But now he pissed his pants And I know why (Why man....yeah-HEEEEAAAHHH!!) Because I got high Because I got high Because I got high (LaDaDa...Da-Da...Da-Da)

• Good thing he was wearing his BatDepends. Batman is always prepared!!

• &#64; Matt Morrison: But, see, however poorly those other examples were executed (and I haven't read those stories, so I have no opinion on them, though I must admit that your "for the children" stance is kinda pissing me off), those are plot points with the potential to add something to the work and/or the character. It may not be a good something, but it's <i>something</i>. This is worse, because it is a moment that both adds nothing to the character and actually detracts from one of the best superhero comics ever written solely because Kevin Smith thought it would be funny. Anyone who reads Year One after reading this will immediately and unavoidably think of Batman's underpants filling up with urine when they get to that part in Year One, and considering that that part is maybe the defining moment of the whole story and one of the most mythic moments in the history of superhero comics, that's a damn shame. And that's not even considering the fact that nothing on that page makes a lick of sense anyway. Why is Batman essentially talking like two different people on that page? Why does it look like he's wearing a coat on one side of his body and the traditional cape and cowl on the other? Where the fuck are Batman and Baphomet supposed to be standing? Why is Batman telling a vigilante he just met about the time he peed his pants? Why does the "searing heat" make him piss himself? Most importantly, even assuming that Batman DID piss himself in exactly the way described, WHY DO WE NEED TO KNOW THAT!?

• So let's see if understand this properly. Kevin Smith wrote Batman: 1. blowing up some rich guy's house with crazy amounts of plastic explosive... 2. just so he could drop the "Scary Batman" act on a bunch of old rich people... 3. for the evil crime of, what? Voting against the New Deal or something? And people wonder why Lex Luthor hates superheroes...

• oh for fuck's sake you need to get nerd license REVOKED!! i bet you endorse twilight as well, don't you?

• Actually he says Baphomet is joking... Batman just says he had a "bladder spasm" - not that he wet himself.

• The problem is that after a character has been written for so long, a certain amount of terrible stories will be written about them. This is the second worst decision in the history of the Batman universe, right behind the dumbass who decided bringing Jason Todd back would be a good idea.

• Well, THERE'S a new entry for "Most Bizarre Article Titles to Show Up in My RSS Feed"

• Actually,no. The character as he was orignally conceived by Bill Finger and Bob Kane was a dark,Dracula-like vigilante who carried a gun and killed criminals with a kind of dark glee. If anything,he was closer to a character like The Punisher. The only reason he got watered down and turned into a joke was because of the comics code and Werthrams penis obsession. After the camp-tastic TV show,Batman was on the verge of being cancelled and vanishing into obscurity until Denny O'Neil and Neal Adams brought him back as...a dark,Dracula-like creature of the night vigilante. So no,Batman was never intended to be a joke or whatever the hell Grant Morrison is obsessed with turning him into.

• This can start a new list Top Ten superheros that need to be taken down a notch, Batman would deft be high up on that list. Higher than the Punisher but lower than Wolvie.

• Ladies and Gentlemen, presenting... the Death of American Comics! Witness the destruction wrought by 30 years of inbred fan-fiction-level smug ironic self-congratulatory douchiness. Stan Lee, Otto Binder, John Broome and Al Feldstein were or are real men. The douchebags who write the current crap are a lot of spoiled immature ghouls feeding off the creativity of the real working writers who actually created the icons we love.

• You know, I could get behind this if it was funny at all. But it just isn't. The delivery of the joke is really poor. And I just don't really see the point in it. There are plenty of awesome Batman stories and one-shots that humanize him in a variety of ways. Do we really need this? Couldn't Smith have at least come up with his own scenario for Bats to piss himself in instead of ripping of Millers work for it (come on Smith, it was one of the only good things Miller ever did! Don't ruin it!)? I used to be a fan of Smith's stuff when I was a teenager, but now I go back and watch his movies and I'm pretty disappointed. However, I can see that he totally has a love of piss and shit humor, which ultimately is only funny if you're really immature and think Bayformers is comedy gold. Or if it's in Venture bros. because they can make that kind of humor funny instead of lame.

• Man, I love me some Kevin Smith. the comic was great. I love how all you "Fanboys" that didn't even read the issue have your panties in a twist over it.

• Okay, seriously, what the hell happened to Kevin Smith? I am really starting to hate the guy.

• Personally, I find it rather funny that everyone expects Batman to be the poster-boy for Grim 'n' Gritty when he actually spent most of his existance NOT being either of those adjectives. Look back through the vast majority of Batman's history and count up how long incidents like the "Rainbow Batman" suits and "Bat-Hombre" went on, or even the mildly-dark-ish 80's version, versus the current "Goddamn Batman" phase. Technically speaking, his current über-dark persona should be seen as the aberration. :P

• I think this is awesome. Batman is a guy. He's Bruce Wayne and anything that lets the air out of Frank Miller, one of the most over rated writers in the history of over rating, is great in my book.

• And frankly, now that I think about it, there are very few Batman stories that I've read (so far) that are that particularly amazing. Even Long Halloween was more about Batman moping about his parents than actual solving the murders. To date, my favourite Batman is the one in Batman: TAS, and that version is very different than the one that appears in the comics most of the time.

• Yeah, exactly. I mean really, a guy like Batman shouldn't have survived 3 missions with the Justice League.

• Eh, I don't see the problem. Batman has gone Chuck Norris at this point; ludicrously overpowered and overblown by fans and people failing to be funny. He's awesome, sure, but god damn, the guy can have ONE flaw.

• Ehhhh. I don't think anyone's getting overly mad about this, but I do think this is just dumb, weird and not very Batman-y. It's just kinda disrespectful to mess with such a classic scene. If Smith wants his Batman to pee then let him pee, but at least have him do it in his own crappy story. I do, however, present an alternative to the phrase 'batshit' as a degree of insanity; Kevin Smith is batpiss insane.

• Kevin Smith tried to make a splash and pissed off a bunch of fanboys. After a steady stream of backlash, he's now all wet. Kevin just needs to take a shower, play some Wii, and relax with a glass of lemonade.

• What you don't realize is that he was still prepared. The blue trunks? Depends.

• I used to think Kevin Smith was funny, but lately his writing is just crap. This is the icing on the urinal cake. It's not funny, it's not "humanizing" so much as just making Batman pathetic. A crass attempt at toilet humour... I guess this is what we should expect from KS these days.

• Oh for fuck's sake, get over yourself. All this hysteria is more idiotic than the actual comic panel in question.

• thats fucking funny

• I agree, Year One was the first comic book I had ever read and that page with batman busting through the wall has always been the image I see in my head when I think of him. I can get trying to humanize him, some of his best story's have that aspect, the idea of him being an unrelenting perfectionist, planning and planning for everything in fear he'll ever lose control. That's a great aspect of him, but this was just unnecessary. Kevin Smith writes great comedy, especially comedy dialog and I think something as serious and dark as batman, is just a really really bad fit. So my biggest wonder is why they let him write it or why he agreed to do it. I'm not going to get enraged by this, sure it sucks, but just ignore it and trust me, you'll never hear about it again.

• .... -rigs up a house "Saw" style- excuse me, i need to go and kidna-er, "visit" kevin smith.

• If peeing your pants is cool, i'm Miles Davis!

• he's obviously trying to troll all the over zealous batman fans out there...

• Oh ffffff, wrong post.

• So "Goku" is a different song? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dS0xzQafxjI

• So, then the next panel had Batman smirk and say something like "man, you BOUGHT that? I'm the goddamn Batman, I'm not going to have a bladder malfunction!" right? Because that makes it a joke. Oh, that follow up panel DIDN'T happen? Spin control.

• Am I the only one disturbed that out of all the things in the comic to spark an outcry of fandom rage... it's this? Spider-Man having a drunken one night stand at his own aunt's wedding? I didn't hear hardly a twitter. Peter Parker's roommate gets raped by The Chameleon (in a book aimed at ages 9 and up, no less) and the whole thing is treated as comedy? A few voices of protest, but nothing major. Or hell... in this same issue, Kevin Smith fridges YET ANOTHER beloved girlfriend character for the sheer sake of making the hero even more miserable. (Remember Guardian Devil, anyone?). And you people are getting pissed off (no pun intended) over Batman having a reflexive response to intense heat near his crotch? *sighs* That pretty much sums up everything that's wrong with comics today, right there.

• It's stuff like this is why I don't read Marvel or DC superhero stuff anymore. Too much stupid crap like killing young children, and not enough escapism.

• I hate you, Kevin Smith.

• Uggh. It's NOT funny -- that's the point. It's just a lame joke: "see the batman made a pee pee when he was trying to be a badass, hee hee" God Kevin Smith sucks ass. He had one good movie in him, Chasing Amy -- and that was apparently because he only he had one important thing to say as an artist. Everything else he's written or directed has just been awful, mediocre dreck. This proves he's got no new or original idea, just derivative stories and potty humor. I guess what I'm trying to say is this is really, really bad "writing."

• Personally, I think you have a terrible sense of humor.

• FFFFodder....

• Minding my own business (I was looking at the Green Lantern light-up prop that was out that year, 2003, perhaps?) when one of Smith's "entourage" (yelling loudly "Comin' through!!) pushed me in the back headfirst into a glass dealer's case at Wizard World Chicago. You know how wide those aisles aren't at Rosemont (maybe six people across). I was "neutral to slightly negative" on Kevin Smith before this. I thought he was doing a disaffected send-up of fanboys and that most fanboys just weren't smart enough to see that he was mocking them all the way to the bank back in the early 00's Now I have only contempt and disgust and disgust is what I feel for this Bat-peeing stuff. Don't care that much for the Bat, but I keenly suspect that Smith cares far, far less than I do.

• Now, now, there's a fine line between humanizing a character and stupidizing a character. My dad once brought home a Hobo who claimed to actually be a millionaire and set him to live with us. That's human...but pretty stupid. In this comic Batman brings to his secret hideout and reveals his and his fiance's secret to a gun wielding masked vigilante named Baphomet. After just meeting him. It's not only profoundly stoopid, but greatly out of character. It's one thing to have Batman piss himself, but it could be dignified. Look at him in the panel. He's embarassed. I liken it to being a veteran and pissing yourself in the battlefield. He should be able to say it ith a serious face. It's not dramatic new insight or humanization. It's a piss joke.

• Soujah boy is a rich wanabe anime nerd. Batman pissed his pants. I don't want to live in this world.

• Maybe Kevin Smith has his own bladder problems and is trying to make himself feel better. "Sniff, see? see? Batman does it."

• At least we now know that the only man who can make Batman have a bladder spasm is himself.

• I'm actually okay with this. Batman: year One has Bruce Wayne almost getting killed by a bunch of hookers and then getting his ass stomped by a handful of kids stealing a TV. This isn't the veteran ass kicker who can get away with anything just because he's Batman. At that point in the story he's just Bruce Wayne in his Pajamas. James Gordon is a bigger badass in that story than Batman is. So yeah I can accept the fact that be may have had a bit of an accident when he almost blew himself up during one of his first times out.

• To be fair, I think Kevin Smith was trying to humanize Batman a little and be funny. Unfortunately, he failed at both. But, I don't believe he was trying to do any harm. It's not out of the realm of possiblity that Batman would be a little scared the first time out. I think Darwyn Cooke handled that perfectly with his Superman Confidential story (Superman was a little scared before something happened to him, because it was something new to him and he wasn't aware he could handle it). Honestly, this is on DC. I realize they want Kevin Smith to write for them, but this never should have seen the light of day.

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