10) The World Hunger Shindig
There are plenty of colorful words to describe The Misfits' manager Eric Raymond: greedy, egomaniacal, tool, all-around scumbag -- I could go on. And of them, charitable and compassionate aren't on the list; Eric would sooner tell off a homeless derelict to get a job than drop a quarter in his filthy coffee cup. So when he agreed to be the promoter behind the "World Hunger Shindig" charity event, it goes without saying that it raised a few eyebrows, and made a stress-induced vein throb on Jem's forehead. With the help of his personal agent saboteur and professional thief-for-hire Zipper, Eric skimmed a few dollars -- a cool $250,000 -- off the event's proceeds, most likely to sate his appetites, which I assume are every bit as disgusting as the man himself. But does becoming the complete antithesis to Bono gnaw away at Eric's black heart? Why should it when the only thing he's concerned about is making it rain?
9) Battle of the Bands
Children everywhere learned something about Eric early on in the series: guy's a misogynist. And when Jerrica Benton (Jem's true identity) -- having just wrested back control of her dead father's record label, Starlight Music, from his sinister clutches -- gets in his way, she learns for herself that Eric's the type of guy who doesn't like to leave without giving, for lack of a better word, a going-away present: backhand! Does she call the proper authorities? Nope. Does she -- for a bit of justifiable revenge -- have Synergy create a horrifying, ghostly image of her dead father to haunt Eric until he snaps from the psychological onslaught? Of course not. Jerrica simply has her purple-haired boyfriend Rio force feed him a knuckle sandwich and call it a day. But while Eric wasn't above slapping Jerrica around, he wouldn't dare do the same to Pizzazz no matter how many times the thought has entered his mind. Because you know as well as I do that she could easily break his wrist with all that pent-up anger of hers.
8) Old Meets New
In the episode "Old Meets New," Jem and the Holograms, after having their music practically called auditory diarrhea, befriend a crotchety, washed-up 1950's rocker named Bobby Bailey -- whom of which sounds like he gargles with shards of jagged glass. The Holograms all soon learn that the block Bobby's apartment/erstwhile recording studio is located on is scheduled to be demolished by (surprise, surprise) Eric and The Misfits in order to start building a record manufacturing facility. Always the ones to make a grandiose entrance, the four pull up the street in a massive wrecking crane and start smashing condemned buildings without so much as giving those living in the area a heads-up, or notifying the city that their impromptu demolition will be causing traffic obstruction. As per usual, Pizzazz of The Misfits grows impatient with Eric's progress and takes control of the wrecking ball like a mad woman, nearly tearing up the street and killing everyone living inside Bobby's apartment complex. We all know that being a music mogul, Eric knows next to nothing about operating heavy machinery, so that's already one infraction. But Pizzazz's penchant for inciting disaster almost turned a slap on the wrist into negligent manslaughter granted if someone actually got swiped by the wrecking ball.
7) Colliding Stars
There are many hard lessons to be learned on Jem and the Holograms, with this one particularly imperative to techies everywhere: if you leave state-of-the-art, delicate equipment unattended -- even for a second -- within the vicinity of The Misfits, you can bet that they'll tamper with it, causing untold mayhem and destruction, all the while never truly held culpable for their actions. Such was the case when The Holograms were filming a real winner of a movie that called for Kimber to be in a motorcycle stunt scene (she absolutely screams action hero, yes?). While leaving to let the stuntwoman takeover, Roxy of The Misfits and Misfit-wannabe Clash double team the explosives technician and fiddle around with the console causing the charges to detonate early on Kimber -- pretty much turning the entire movie set into an Eastern European minefield. This is a children's show, so the network censors weren't going to let a Hologram walk away with third degree burns and a missing lower jaw -- you can even say Kimburned -- but it's totally fine to let The Misfits be relieved of responsibility from the whole incident. Hey, just like the real world!
6) Hot Time in Hawaii
It may not be the most well thought out tactic, let alone a little rough around the edges, but kidnapping is an undeniable classic in the Saturday morning villain playbook. In one episode, The Holograms and The Misfits are invited to attend "Battle of the Music Stars": an olympic-like event that pits the two bands against each other through a series of sporting events; because we all know that on top of being popular musicians, they're world-class athletes. A common trope that's been used in practically every episode of Jem is the removal of one of The Holograms to sabotage a performance or event that requires the entire band to be in attendance, and -- more often than not -- Zipper is typically ordered by Eric or The Misfits to do the dirty deed. Removing Kimber the Perennial Victim from the field, Zipper leaves her tied up and gagged in an active volcano -- and on the weakest rock ledge imaginable hanging over a raging river of lava. It was originally his intention to simply leave Kimber out of reach -- and screaming distance -- of her friends, but Zipper never took into account the volatile nature of a volcano, let alone that she'd pass out and die from the blistering heat (he's a henchman, they're not paid to think). Thus this crime would've gone from kidnapping to involuntary manslaughter, had it not been for The Holograms timely derailment of The Misfits' plans.