The 20 Lamest Looking Aliens from the Various Star Trek Series

By Chris Cummins in Daily Lists, TV
Thursday, May 24, 2012 at 8:00 am
Lame Looking Star Trek Aliens.jpg
On September 8, 1966, Star Trek premiered on NBC and gave birth to a unkillable franchise that remains unlike anything else in popular culture. In the 46 years since, audiences have seen numerous movies and sequel series based on the show that have helped keep Gene Roddenberry's vision alive. An immeasurable part of Trek's enduring appeal are its wonderful alien races. From the logic-bound Vulcans (epitomized by Mr. Spock) to the cold calculation of Cardassians like Garak, these creatures have shown us how wonderful and diverse the universe could be. That is except when they are completely ridiculous. Yes friends, terrific though they may be, the various Treks have had more than their fair share of poorly designed, ill-advised and just straight up dumb looking extraterrestrials over the years. So for today's extremely subjective and totally superficial Daily List, I'll be offering up my picks for the 20 lamest looking aliens in Trek history. I'm sure your mileage may vary, so feel free to mention your least favorite creatures in the comments below. But for now, let's take a look at some aliens who should boldly go back to wherever the hell they came from. 

20) Lal
What series is it from? Star Trek: The Next Generation
Why is it so lame?
Michael Westmore is the genius responsible for designing the appearance of most of the Star Trek aliens since TNG debuted in 1987. So I'm more than willing to cut him some slack for the look of Data's android baby/whatever Lal, who appears to be constructed of Silly Putty and half-assedness.

19) The Bringloidi
What series are they from? Star Trek: The Next Generation
Why are they so lame?
This list is based strictly on looks, which is a good thing because you all will now be spared a lengthy diatribe about how the Bringloidi are little more than offensive Irish stereotypes played for laughs. So much for that whole infinite diversity in infinite combinations thing. Anyway, these folks are dressed like they are extras in Oliver! Which would be fine if Worf joined them for a rousing version of "Oom-Pah-Pah." This was not to be however, so they've squandered away any possible goodwill they might have had with me.

18) Jaresh-Inyo
What series is he from? Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.
Why is he so lame?
Because the President of the Federation should never be a cowardly version of McGruff the Crime Dog. For the two of you who probably care, his race is known as the Grazerite. See, you learned something completely pointless today. Whee! Hey, it could come up at quizzo I suppose.

17) Xindi-Aquatics
Xindi aquatic.jpg

What series are they from? Star Trek: Enterprise.
Why are they so lame?
'Cause they've got faith....of the heart! Or because they are low-rent versions of Dune's Third Stage Guild Navigator. Take your pick.
16) The Hirogen
What series are they from? Star Trek: Voyager.
Why are they so lame? Two words: MORTAL KOMBAT!

15) The Lactrans

What series are they from? Star Trek: The Animated Series.
Why are they so lame? The Lactrans are space slugs who kidnap members of the Enterprise to inhabit their intergalactic zoo. But a race of beings who can be trounced by a salt shaker are hardly much of a threat.
14) Amarie
What series is she from? Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Why is she so lame?
Unless employed by the Mos Eisley Cantina or Jabba's Palace, space musicians are lame. Even more so when they look like George Wendt in drag. It was cute when she was running around France being whimsical though.

13) Catullans
What series are they from? Star Trek.
Why are they so lame?
Are they seriously accessorizing with fried eggs? Go fuck yourself space hippies.

12) Barash
What series is it from? Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Why is it so lame?
Coming from an unidentified alien race, Barash here was a lonely alien who pretended to be Riker's son in "Future Imperfect." That awesome mindfuck of an episode was nearly derailed when Barash revealed his true appearance -- which apparently is that of a dude in a cheap Grey alien costume from Spirit Halloween Superstore.

11) The Kazon
What series are they from? Star Trek: Voyager.
Why are they so lame?
The Kazon were the most notable foes of the Voyager crew during the show's first season. But they received a lukewarm response from the audience. That coupled with the fact that the writing staff could never figure out what to do with them resulted in the race being hastily written off the show. The lesson to be gleaned from all of this for any future sci-fi scribes out there is this: never expect your aliens to be menacing if they have tree bark for hair. 

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