Rambo to Return Again? And Can Mutated Wolves Please Be Involved?

Way back in 2009, we reported that a fifth Rambo film was in the works that featured the titular antihero squaring off against chemically engineered werewolves. It sounded shithouse bonkers, and the fact that it never came to fruition makes it one of the most notable missed opportunities in recent trash history cinema. Today comes word that another Rambo flick is in the works…but, tragically, it doesn’t sound like it is going to include any mutated wolf wonderment: Comic Book Resources has the details of this dubious rumor that originated from the German website Splendid Film:

The website reports that a fifth Rambo movie is in the works, and is described as follows: “With Rambo V Sylvester Stallone returns in his iconic role. This time he goes up against a Mexican cartel. Stallone, who has also written the screenplay, describes the new Rambo as his version of No Country for Old Men.”

Normally, I’m loathe to report on baseless rumors, but I wanted to make an exception in this case to issue the following statement: If Sylvester Stallone is out there reading this, or if any of you have people who know his people please tell them that we here at Topless Robot are huge fans of Sly’s filmography as an actor and director (even Demolition Man and Staying Alive!), and as chuffed as we all are at the prospect of having him bring John Rambo back for a moody rumination on aging and the death of the American dream, we would much rather see this iconic character beating the crap out of mutated wolves whom may or may not also have laser vision. Please make this happen. Hugs!