7 Disturbing Things from Japan's Weirdly Pervy (but Canonical) Transformers Kiss Players

Thursday, June 26, 2014 at 6:00 am
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She's got the touch! She's got the power!
Ever since the live-action Transformers movies came out, fans have criticized many things, including the story, the character designs, the characters in general, Shia LaBeouf being in them, and the over-sexualization of the female leads. Well, that last one could have been worse. Much worse.


You're probably wondering just how much worse. Well, it could have been like Kiss Players.

Kiss Players is a Japanese franchise in Takara Tomy's Transformers universe that came out in 2006. It's not exactly canon to the stateside continuities, but they use the same characters. The project was spearheaded by a man named Yuki Ohshima, who was also the illustrator and writer for the Kiss Players manga. It was also a radio play and a toy line that featured figurines bundled with Transformers from the Alternators series.

It gets very NSFW at times...


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Weekend Hangover: 12 Stories You Might have Missed, From Aquaman to Dracula

Monday, June 16, 2014 at 6:00 am

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Compiled as always with the help of Kyle LeClair, this weekend's styories saw the casting of a new Aquaman, a Hello Kitty collection that repels tomcats, a Disneylike Doctor or 13 (above), and cricket chips.

Tipsters this week include: Gallen_Dugall, SlyDante777, Citrus_King, Dr.Gonzo82, troi, Anyone00, Timely Flower-Hermit, andre_morelo

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Blu-ray Today: Bushido Boredom, Anime Economics, Liam Neeson and the Cosmos

Tuesday, June 10, 2014 at 8:00 am

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Bushido Man - A warrior returns to his master to recount the tale of seven fights he had with seven masters of different fighting styles, all of whom were in possession of valuable scrolls that unlock the secrets of their discipline.

Alas, this is not some lost martial-arts cult classic, but a movie that appears to have been made by martial artists who wanted to be on YouTube. The production value is terrible, the story one that would have been better served in seven non-narrative online shorts (in fact, it can be seen that way, so why even buy the disc?), and only the fight choreography gives the viewer anything to pay attention to. Our "hero" is even kind of a dick, challenging people who weren't giving him any trouble and stealing their prized possessions.

Towards the end, things get slightly more fun as realism goes out the window: wrist guns that fire when you punch are utilized, as are nun-chuks made from a severed arm and tendons. But it's too little, too late, and you find yourself wishing the film itself would commit seppuku and be done with.

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New Japanese Sailor Moon Crystal Trailer

Thursday, June 5, 2014 at 5:45 pm

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I have to admit...

I have never been remotely interested in Sailor Moon. Not as a story, not as fetish material. The artwork, designs and squeaky voices just never appealed in any way.

But I know many of you are, like tipster Brian Stanley, who sent me this link along with the line "MOON PRISM POWER, MOTHERFUCKERS!" So here's a new trailer. It's in Japanese, but there isn't really much plot on display so I don't think it matters - showing off updated animation seems to be the point.

And sorry...I'm still not interested. Just trying to look out for the rest of you. And if I say any more, my wife will probably be mad at me, so I'll stop. Don't worry; once she forces me to watch I'll probably be okay with it.

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Mountains of Madness Movie: Dead to del Toro, Alive on Kickstarter!

Wednesday, June 4, 2014 at 5:30 pm

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One of the great near-misses of cinematic geekdom, along with Jodorowsky's Dune, is Guillermo del Toro's H.P. Lovecraft's At the Mountains of Madness, which ultimately got nixed because even with Tom Cruise attached, the studio didn't think the budget could be justified on an R-rated film (the same reason Gore Verbinski's Bioshock never happened).

But an independent, animated version? Totally doable. No big names on this one, but with the aid of top casting directors and your donations, they expect to have a top-notch pitch that will secure full funding for a relatively cheap $2.5 million cartoon feature aimed at perverts older consumers.

So that's the catch - you could donate, this could hit its goals, and the pitch might never be picked up. But considering how nicely nerd-specific their video aimed at would-be donors is, I think there's a solid chance...

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Blu-ray Today: Robocop Reborn, Titans Attack, and a Bed Eats People

Tuesday, June 3, 2014 at 8:00 am

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Robocop (Remake) - Yes, the original RoboCop is an unassailable, stone-cold classic, but it's not as if back in its day there weren't multiple attempts to suck the brand dry of all spin-off potential. Judged against the Paul Verhoeven film, most things fail, but judged against almost anything else associated with the name of Robocop, this remake stands tall, with a cast you can only buy for top dollar, and a different enough spin (Murphy knows he's Robocop from the getgo, as does everyone else) that it never feels like a bad Xerox.

If they don't decide to go for a Robosequel, I'd be happy enough with a spinoff movie centered on Samuel L. Jackson's Bill O'Reilly knockoff character Pat Novak.



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Blu-ray Today: Monkeys, Dragons, Vampires and Thrills

Tuesday, May 27, 2014 at 8:00 am

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Journey to the West - Stephen Chow's utterly insane origin tale for China's popular legend of the Monkey King is an absolute must-see for fans of monsters, martial arts and weird comedy. A far-from-adequate amateur demon hunter must take on a pig demon, sea monster and the 500-years imprisoned Monkey King, all while much more experienced hunters with supernatural powers try to get there first. The Blu-ray includes six featurettes, but the film's full title, Journey to the West: Conquering the Demons suggests there may be more installments planned, and since there's a lot of legend left to go, we can but hope that Chow gets to put his sublimely silly stamp on more installments.


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Weekend Hangover: 17 Stories You May Have Missed

Monday, May 19, 2014 at 6:00 am

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As you did or did not check out Godzilla this weekend, here are some of the other happenings you might have missed, as submitted by your fellow readers and occasionally me too. Compiled with the help of Kyle LeClair; this week's tipsters include Rx79immigrant84, SlyDante777, GallenDugall, Citrus King, troi, TImely_Flower-Hermit, Dr.Gonzo82, Anyone00.

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Weekend Hangover: 17 Non-Star Wars Stories You May Have Missed

Monday, May 5, 2014 at 6:00 am

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With May the 4th yesterday, the weekend was buzzing with Star Wars-related goodness - so much so that you may have missed a few things less Force-fully presented.

As always, we're here to rectify that. With the assistance of compiler Kyle LeClair, here are some of the stories you may have missed over the weekend. Tipsters include: Gallen_Dugall, SlyDante777, troi, Rx79immigrant84, jaganar, rkwsuperstar

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Weekend Hangover 4-28-14: 20 Stories You Might Have Missed

Monday, April 28, 2014 at 6:00 am

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I don't know why I didn't think of this before. It was silly to leave the weekend recap to the middle of the day, and the Hangover was basically kind of a list anyway. So now I'm combining the weekend recap and the first list of the week into one. The downside is that a rare few weekends will do without the Hangover, but the upside is that freelance money will be liberated to do a bit more...something I'll elaborate on as weeks go by.

As always, these tips were compiled with the help of Kyle LeClair, and tipsters for this week include: Anyone00, Dr.Gonzo82, SlyDante777, donnaryoko, troi, Gallen_Dugall, jaganar, skrag2112

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