Yes, a Guardians of the Galaxy Porno Starring Groot Is Coming

By Luke Y. Thompson in Comics, Movies
Wednesday, October 29, 2014 at 12:00 pm


I might have guessed this would be inevitable, but I didn't think Groot would be the featured player, even if there are a million bad jokes about wood that promptly write themselves. Wood Rocket, after all, have made porn parodies of Bob's Burgers and The Room, and most recently did a pictorial of female porn stars crossplaying as Bill Murray characters...and the Caddyshack gopher [NSFW]

I imagine one of the upsides of making love to Groot is that you never have to worry about him calling out another woman's name.

The big question is: who do you want him to hook up with? Gamora, Nebula...or Rocket Raccoon?

First Look at the New Terminator Feels (Appropriately) Like Halloween Cosplay

By Luke Y. Thompson in Movies
Wednesday, October 29, 2014 at 10:26 am

EW via

Um, yeah. So this happened.

That's Sarah Connor and Kyle Reese on the left, and John Connor apparently meeting The Doctor on the right. Oh, and there's more:

Sarah Connor isn't the innocent she was when Linda Hamilton first sported feathered hair and acid-washed jeans in the role. Nor is she Hamilton's steely zero body-fat warrior in 1991's T2. Rather, the mother of humanity's messiah was orphaned by a Terminator at age 9. Since then, she's been raised by (brace yourself) Schwarzenegger's Terminator--an older T-800 she calls "Pops"--who is programmed to guard rather than to kill. As a result, Sarah is a highly trained antisocial recluse who's great with a sniper rifle but not so skilled at the nuances of human emotion.

"Since she was 9 years old, she has been told everything that was supposed to happen," says Ellison. "But Sarah fundamentally rejects that destiny. She says, 'That's not what I want to do.' It's her decision that drives the story in a very different direction."

I guess it'd be dull to do the exact same plot again. But if she's been raised by a Terminator, does that mean she has the Arnold accent too? Because that would make this amazing, in the absolute wrong way. And I'd probably watch it 50 times for the lolz.

GWAR's Tribute to Late Lead Singer Oderus Is a Pet Shop Boys Cover

By Luke Y. Thompson in Live Performance, Music
Wednesday, October 29, 2014 at 10:00 am


What did you expect - "Tears in Heaven"?

The AV Club has an ongoing feature where they invite bands in to do unlikely covers from a limited list, and GWAR were game - though they turn their metal take on "West End Girls" into a totally new tune at the end that focuses on the untimely death of Dave Brockie/Oderus Urungus.

Is it weirder than when The Pet Shop Boys covered Elvis? You be the judge...

New Comic Book Day: Happy Halloween!

Wednesday, October 29, 2014 at 8:00 am


We've got two whole months of wholesome family holidays ahead of us, but first we get to celebrate the most ridiculous, inane day of the year: Election Day. Also Halloween! Just remember, every time someone dressed as V calls themselves "4Chan Man," Alan Moore loses a little more of his soul (beard) to Yog-Sothoth. In this week's comics, two long runs and a short one close; a short marriage and a long war keep grinding to a halt; and the next issue of Joe Casey's best work since "Poptopia" comes out.

20 Disturbing and Funny Lemax Halloween Figurines for Train Sets and Dioramas

By Luke Y. Thompson in Daily Lists, Toys
Wednesday, October 29, 2014 at 6:00 am


It's amazing the things you learn when you're married.

As a single guy, I would never have set food inside Michael's, the arts/crafts/home decor mega-store chain that always looked like a way to fleece domestic spouses out of disposable decorations. And then I discovered Spooky Town, and became just as willingly fleeced. Spooky Town is a Halloween/horror-themed collection of figurines and accessories that can work with either model train sets, or as miniature villages like the Christmas ones your mom might collect. What's most impressive, though, is that for items exclusively sold at such a family friendly store, they are in many cases about as appropriate for young 'uns as old-school McFarlane Toys. In other words...NOT.

Let's take a look at some of the weirdest ones available...

Extended/Comic-Con Age of Ultron Trailer

By Luke Y. Thompson in Comics, Movies
Tuesday, October 28, 2014 at 10:23 pm


If you missed it after Agents of SHIELD tonight, here you go - basically the teaser with a longer intro, featuring the party scene you've heard described since this past July.

Love how Thor seems to momentarily get worried that Cap might be worthy.

Agents of SHIELD SPOILER Thread - New Age of Ultron Clip Edition

By Luke Y. Thompson in Comics, TV
Tuesday, October 28, 2014 at 5:11 pm


I'm a little bummed she doesn't have the yellow goggles. Safe to say a lot is at stake in this scene.

Remember: NEW Age of Ultron footage tonight, and it won't be the clip I described from this morning's event.

It also won't be effects footage - we were told that the current teaser uses literally every finished effects shot so far.

Cosplay Documentary to Showcase at Comikaze in Glasses-Free 3D

By Luke Y. Thompson in Tech
Tuesday, October 28, 2014 at 4:47 pm


While I'm not sure I need to see Yaya Han get ultra-competitive in yet another cosplay documentary, the glasses-free 3D thing seems like a pretty big deal. Ultra-D is an adjustable 3D format that uses a combination of viewscreen lenses and 4K technology to make even existing content pop out in new ways. Or so the claim is, anyway.

There'll be an hourlong panel for Cosplay Dreams 3D on Sunday, November 2 at 12 p.m. as part of Comikaze in downtown L.A., but the film will also have a booth where you can check out the new tech. The movie will also headline the Los Angeles 3D Film Festival on December 6th.

If this technology proves operable as it is described, then yes, your porn DVDs will work with it too.

Diamond Select Reveals New Images of Next Star Trek Action Figure: Worf

By Luke Y. Thompson in TV, Toys
Tuesday, October 28, 2014 at 3:30 pm


I was a big fan of Diamond's first two Select Kirk and Spock figures, but I'm now wondering if the cost of materials went up, as their Picard and Worf seem a bit more limited. I'm not talking about their semi-preposed nature, but rather the diorama bits - Kirk came with Khan and a piece of the engine room, while Spock came with a Horta. Worf comes with...the Klingon Empire insignia on a wall? I mean, I know the episode, but couldn't we get a piece of floor to stand him on?

Yes, Worf toy, I know, "I do not require the creature comforts of your other figures. I am a Klingon." I'm just saying foot pegs would keep you from falling over.

Worf will hit stores next spring.

Your Best GHOSTBUSTERS 3 Pitches and Costume Winner

By Luke Y. Thompson in Merchandise, Movies
Tuesday, October 28, 2014 at 2:00 pm

Thumbnail image for gbcostume.jpg

It seems this was less easy than you might have thought. And now you know why it has taken so long to get the real version going. I asked you to pitch me a scene from Paul Feig's all-female Ghostbusters 3, and the estrogen element seems to have been confusing.

Two honorable mentions and one winner follow...