By Rob Bricken in
Daily Lists, Merchandise
Friday, Jan. 9 2009 @ 5:03AM
By Caleb GoellnerMonopoly is debatably the most frustrating mainstream board game in the world. Created in a time when Americans played games to escape woes wrought by the Dust Bowl, a militarizing Germany and migrant farm work, Monopoly was a great way for families to pretend they actually had money for an extended period of time. Given this century's steep economic downturn, what better time than now to revisit the popular time-waster and celebrate its many forays into nerd territory with a list of some of the board game's nerdiest game tokens? There are simply too many cool options to keep playing with a thimble. Read on to reaffirm an unhealthy appreciation for pushing pewter-cast shapes past Go and collecting $200.
10) Starscream from Transformers Monopoly
Thanks to Michael Bay, by now everybody is pretty familiar with Autobots and Decepticons. Even two years after the film's release it's impossible to swing a dead Jazz without hitting some Optimus Prime or Megatron merchandise at a big box store. Lucky for nerds, Monopoly wasn't corrupted by Bay's lunacy and contains tokens based on classic character models. While all of the pieces look good, Starscream gets the most cred for his sheer smug bastardry (it's not a real word here, but it's quite common on Cybertron).
9) Super Grover from Sesame Street Monopoly
Muppets and super heroes each get their share of love here at TR, so it should come as no surprise to see this magnificent amalgam make an appearance on this list. Super Grover embodies everything that made pre-health nut Cookie Monster Sesame Street great. He's faster than lightning, stronger than steel and smarter than a speeding bullet. Why, there's no Sesame Muppet better suited to absentmindedly crush his foes by claiming the most valuable properties on the board.
8) Darth Sidious from Star Wars Episode 1 Monopoly
Star Wars has inspired several Monopoly sets over the years, with character tokens culled from both the original trilogy as well as the prequels. Every piece is nerdy, but there's nothing nerdier than using Palpatine himself to build a financial "Empire." It may seem like an oversight to pick ol 'Sidious in place of the more obvious choice of Jar Jar Binks, but everyone knows that piece gets thrown away immediately upon opening this super bombad game.
7) Pikachu from Pokémon Monopoly
Though an earlier 1999 version included non-painted metal pieces, the colorful cast in 2001's Pokémon Monopoly takes the cake with bright little buggers plucked straight from the original RPG. Pikachu isn't necessarily the coolest (that spot should probably go to the pewter version of Snorlax from the 1999 game), but given his history of abuse under the tyrannical Ash, the electro mouse deserves this consolation prize.
6) Ultraman from Ultraman Monopoly
Casting off the pewter shackles of American tradition, these game pieces were pretty much the same Ultraman token cast in differing hues of translucent neon plastic. Given Ultraman's popularity in Japan, this version of Monopoly is logical from a marketing standpoint, but the true potential for traditional gameplay ends there. Building houses and hotels? Out of the question. Every single property on the board stands to be devalued exponentially with each monster-battling lap around the board by Earth's shiny protector.
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18 comments
Comments
Zach Oat said:
if I had that Clue pistol, I'd shoot Pennybags in his stupid mustache, and no whistle-blowing cop would be able to make me go directly to jail.
Have I ever mentioned that I was in the stage musical version of Monopoly in junior high? I played Weed, the leader of a gang on Baltic Avenue. We were badass, and our dance number was badass.
Ramses J.C. said:
What the fuck with the Simpsons Monopoly Game? no pewter tokens, just horrible cardboard figures, when i bought it i tried to get my money back because of that, but the store clerk just laughed at me...
Zeno said:
True story: Last summer when I taught my kids to play Monopoly they asked if they could use their own pieces and I said yes. My daughter fetched her 2" Optimus Prime figurine and my son brought his pet fence lizard on the table. The game board looked like the set of a Toho movie...
Proof: _http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v255/pzcortez/misc_blog/DSCN1117.jpg
wendo27 said:
Growing up I was unfortunate enough to own the NES Monopoly game. My best friend didn't have Nintendo (or cable) so she looked to us for entertainment in the winter months (she did have a pool so summers were her parents burden).
She's the only person I have ever met who liked - no loved - the NES Monopoly game. And she'd always be the dog. I started to hate hearing that little fucker bark.
Grrr... talk about better forgotten.
Theda said:
What about C-3PO in the original trilogy Star Wars Monopoly? Easiest way to annoy your opponents into submission ever.
Jesse said:
What really irks me more than nerdy Monopoly games are those sports-themed ripoffs that turn up in bookstores; you know, like "Volopoly" (based off of the Tennessee Vols college football team). Who the hell plays that shit?
There's a reason those things populate Goodwills, still sealed in their shrink wrap.
OnanRulz said:
We played the Star Wars Collectors Editin and Episode One Monopoly a lot during post-high school and early-college. The house rule stated that anyone using the word "dollar" instead of "credit" had to pay fifteen credits to the center of the board. After a while, we'd start taunting each other through the voices of whatever characters we'd chosen, and my friend Clarence went so far as to wear a Jar-Jar mask during his turns to drive us insane.
We popped out the Collector's Edition the other night since it'd been years since we played. I discovered that it was never-ending fun to play as Boba Fett, but use his characterization from Robot Chicken to taunt the other players/pieces.
Alder Knight said:
I read, and laughed, and then got to #1, and WHAT. TV, why? Why?
Surprisingly entertaining post, mostly because the concept sounded so unfunny. Super Grover is clearly the most awesome.
My dad challenges me to Monopoly, waits until I get bored, and then trounces my ass. Every. Time. I loathe that game.
@Zeno: That is far more badass than any legit special edition game.
Zortt1 said:
I had a pewter Simpson Monopoly game, it had an option to buy an additional Mr. Burns piece. Which I did and refused to play any form of Monopoly unless I could use that one. A) because I special ordered it so it felt truely like mine and B) because it was gratifying when someone landed on a fully stocked Boardwalk square to curl my fingers and say, "Excellent."
THE PR0F3550R said:
What about Chewbacca from the original trilogy Star Wars edition? I loved playing as him especially because of the special card that clearly states, "Let the wookie win. Pay IC50."
I loved using that card to my advantage. Technically speaking the player who pulls that card is supposed to pay the IC50 to the bank, but I told my friends that since I was playing as Chewbacca they had to pay me the IC50 and if I drew it the bank had to pay me the IC50. It was a great built in cheat for the wookie player.
Clarence said:
I'm the Clarence to whom OnanRulz was referring. I don't remember wearing the mask during any games, but I sure as hell spoke in a Jar Jar voice as much as possible to torment my opponents.
OM said:
...Actually, the pilot episode for the Monopoly game show caught a lot of flack because they'd originally cast a midget/dwarf/"little person" as Uncle Pennybags, who would tapdance his way around the board. The pilot was aired before local TV station execs, and someone leaked it to some union-type group representing the midgets of America, who in turn filed grievances with King World productions. The outcry was enough that the show was delayed for syndication for almost a year while King World retooled it without the dancing midget.
ThatCostumeGirl said:
I wish I had a Super Grover token. I'm pretty sure the game we had was bought before I was a twinkle in anyone's eye. I was a thimble gal.
Crap, now I have to find a Super Grover Monopoly game token.
Snoodle said:
I think I actually own Pokemon Monopoly...hm.
Lol @ #1 :p
MilesandMiles70 said:
Tell me something Zach Oat- do you collect board games in your spare time when you're not jerkin' off to issues of Playgirl in your mother's basement? Because if you do, that would be almost as badass as your dance routines. Rock on, gameboy, rock on.
Spoon said:
Hey, Ramses J.C I own the simpsons monopoly and it has pewter tokens, including a pretty sweet Kang and Blinky, the three-eyed fish.
Poop McGregg said:
Yeah! I was hoping Lord of The Rings monopoly would be on here... Never would I have ever dreamed that it would make #2. I totally just bought that two months ago.
Kevin Tostado said:
I'm producing and directing a documentary about the game of Monopoly called "Under the Boardwalk." It will feature interviews with some of the top players from around the world, as well as cover the history of the game and showcase how Monopoly has become such a huge worldwide phenomenon. It also will have a segment talking about the history of the tokens in the game of Monopoly.
You can check out a teaser trailer, some clips from the interviews and follow our progress as filming continues at http://www.MonopolyDocumentary.com
If you are passionate about the game of Monopoly, I urge you to check out our website and email us!
