Look at all the TM and R's in that bio. I love the cosmic warrior He-Ro. What the fuck? Are you that fucking lazy that you can't come up with a better name than He-Ro? How about Sir Douche of Beggerton? It must be great working for the creative team at Mattel. They must get drunk all day long while brainstorming for character names.

Was "Steve T. Hordak" already taken by another company or something? Look, the guy is an evil interdimensional warlord and magician -- he doesn't have to have a first and last name. Hordak is just fine, okay? You've got to knock this shit off, Mattel.

Great just great. I pretty much gave up on Mattel doing anything right after the way they handled the 2002 He-Man line and cartoon series not to mention the way they fucked up Avatar the Last Airbender by not giving me Katara, Toph, and Azula figures.

I agree, Hordak is his motherfucking name. Why the hell would a guy called Hec-tor Kur change his name to Hordak? It makes no fucking sense. I didn't even know Mattel was doing this stupid shit. Hell, I didn't even know that Beast-Man was really Raqquill Rqazz. What the hell kind of name is Raqquill Rqazz anyways?

Thanks for helping me hate Mattel a little more each and everyday. Mattel forgets that part of the beauty of the Masters of the Universe line was that every character had a simply-stupid name based on some kind of special feature they had.

Fisto = Large Fist
Stratos = Flying guy
Skeletor = Skull face
Mer-Man = merman
Beast-Man = Big Foot guy
Extendar = dude with extending limbs.
Hordak = Evil wizard dude.
Evil-Lyn = Evil woman named Lyn (probably some Mattel dude's ex or mother-in-law)

Aw, c'mon: he couldn't have been Hordak his whole life, could he? I mean, it's not like he had a horde from birth...well, maybe.

Hector Kur, in his early years, before adopting the super villain lifestyle and his sweeeeet new name.

http://nitespyder.com/FatGothKid.jpg

Ugh, will Mantisaur's real name be Cha'vo?

The part that got me was the "Evil Leader of the Evil Horde".

Hec-tor was born on the 15th of Evil, 666. He was born in Evilville, Evilfornia, of the Planet Evil. He was raised by Mr. and Mrs. Evilton Kur the Evilest, and he graduated from Evilfornia State University with a Bachelor's of Evil.

WTF.

No, no, no.

It won´t be Manuel E. Faces

It will be Michael Feces

Well, at least Beastman wasn't named Raqquill Welch.

Although it would explain his love of furry chest harnesses.

"I pretty much gave up on Mattel doing anything right after the way they handled the 2002 He-Man line and cartoon series not to mention the way they fucked up Avatar the Last Airbender by not giving me Katara, Toph, and Azula figures."
THIS. FUCKING THIS.

The thing I want to know is who is this person that thinks the TR writers are not actually nerds? Clearly this individual is insane and should seek treatment.

K my He-Man lore might be a little off but Hordak battled He-Ro? Wasn't He=Man's son named He-Ro... or was that just a coincidence that he named his kid after his predecessor?
God, They just love their damn hyphens.

P.S. F@#$ Mattel

The bios are not considered canon. So the names shouldn't be taken seriously as well. They should leave the "real" names out of the bio or at least put unknown. The mysterious works a lot better than the lame! And one Evil is enough. Hordak is the leader of The Evil Horde. These figures are for adult collectors. I highly doubt any adult would have to question whether or not Hordak was good or evil if he leads The Evil Horde!!

It could be worse...

He could be called:
Man-E-Feces...

Hrm... so are all of the Horde members going to be of Latino descent?

Grizzlor's new name will be Jorge Quiroga
Mantenna will be Juan Gomez
Katra will be Selena Ramirez
Leech will be Paco Pequeno

If I remember it right, in one He-man episode when Man-e-faces and Ram Man had an altercation and became close friends in the end of the episode, they called each other "manny" and "rammy"?

I like that they seem to be basing the story on the 2002 version, somewhat.

And He-Ro? How oldschool.

I don't mind a real name for a character (Keldor worked fine for me), but this one does sound a touch too much like a "real" name for my liking.

Think they'll release a collectors edition of Fearless Photog?

Man, I wish I weren't such a cheapskate. $20 shipping for these figures to Canada is just killer.

The 2002 cartoon turned out pretty good. A few were painful in their marketing (e.g. the episodes where He-Man and Skeletor battle it out in ninja armour with fucking stilts or that battle armour shit), but it was mostly okay (e.g. one episode He-Man just showed up somewhere in ice armour for no fucking reason, it was never explained, and never mentioned ever again).

Who contended that TR writers weren't nerds?

Weird.

I really don't mind when they gave Beast-man a real name just cuz it makes total sense. i doubt when he was born that his mother called him Beast-Man. so i'm more than ok with that, it makes things more legit. but Hordak needed no real name. it's not like his name was Horde-man. Hordak was a great name.

I love how they trademarked Hector Kur as if somebody might use it for something else.

Evil-Lyn™ was originally named Cathy-Lee Gifford™ but changed her name when she was finally fired from her morning talk show due to being "an evil, clueless bint." She immediately left Earth™ to travel to Eternia™ where she offered herself to Skeletor™, the only being who would even consider her shaggable. In return for her evil services™ she was given full-body cosmetic surgery which rejuvenated her looks somewhat, though nothing could be done to make her flesh look any less dead. She retains her pale, corpselike skin and evil demeanor to this day™.

I liked He-Ro. That was very imaginative!!! Good work Mattel!

Couldn't he just be HORDAK, Mattel? He looks like a Hordak. Geez.

Andrew> I agree, though the introduction of Sy-clone was a good enough ep for me-- I didn't mind it as a Macguffin, same for the other armor. But they had a pretty good catch-all reason, saying the Power of Grayskull would prepare him as best as it could when he transforms for the coming journey.

Stanley Ipkis> Is "He-man" really any better to begin with?

--LBD "Nytetrayn"

Mattel has dropped the ball with some of this names...
The most passable name is Raquill Rqazz (when you growl it)
Squidish Rex!? Calamitari Rex would've sound better... A simple mix between Calamity and Calamari.
Hec-Tor Kur? WTF!? first Hector sounds more like a heroic name than the name of the Evil leader of the Evil Horde... A guy who is Double the evil needs a very evil name. How about Horkos Dämonakvan. (Horkos Dämonba'el would be Horde Prime's) They seem more demonesque and way more evil than Hec-Tor.