The 10 Most Villainous Plant Creatures In Nerd-Dom

By Andy Hughes in Daily Lists, Miscellaneous
Tuesday, June 22, 2010 at 7:58 am
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Plants are really otherworldly if you think about it. Living, bloodless beings that infest our domain, sometimes towering formidably above us, sometimes inspiring shitty M. Night Shamaylan movies (and no, none of those plants are on this list). It's no wonder that when writers need a alien, inhuman source of inspiration for their monsters, plants are usually at the top of the list, ranking only under insects and Nazis. Although they seem to currently be on the side of good in humanity's war against the zombies, there's no telling when the vegetable menace will re-awaken. The following all stand as reminders of the evils such malevolent greenery can be capable of. Keep in mind, we're rating based on evil, cunning, and overall intelligence, not just power. And if you're wondering why there are no trees are on here, it's because there are so many evil trees they're getting their own list later. Trees are bastards.


10) The Killer Tomatoes from Attack of the Killer Tomatoes
Say what you will about the groan-inducing films that contained them: these things were pretty fucking tenacious. Able to adapt to land, water, and France, they made life hell for the people of Earth and kept John Astin employed for three whole films, eventually developing little squished faces and nasty teeth. They aren't very bright (they very nearly mistake a man in a tomato suit for one of their own) but the unsettling jittery noises they make are the stuff of nightmares, not to mention shitty cartoons. As a side note, Return of the Killer Tomatoes, which features a be-mulleted George Clooney and no real killer tomatoes, is one of the funniest stupid movies ever and deserves to be seen a lot more than it is.

9) The Krynoids from Doctor Who, "The Seeds of Doom"
A pastiche of a couple of other specimens on this list, these single-minded carnivorous "galactic weeds" start out as pods but soon grow into larger, far more horrifying forms, like a humanoid-shape and a giant leafy elephant-thing. What keeps them so far down on the list? Well, not only are they culled from older, more original examples, they take a backseat to Harrison Chase, the episode's wonderfully Bond villain-esque human baddie, and one of the few evil horticulturists you'll ever see. His speech about the "cruel practice of Bonsai" is almost more memorable than the rampaging plant monsters he unleashes upon the world (or at least his front yard).

8) The Triffids from The Day of the Triffids
Are they Soviet genetic experiments? Aliens? Mutants? It's never made clear. Whatever the origin, these giant pitcher plant/scorpion hybrids are phenomenally deadly, capable of subduing a foe within seconds. Of course they kill; that's not surprising. The creepy part is they hunt. And unlike other mindless conqueror plants, Triffids know exactly where to strike on a human body, which gives it plenty of extra time with which to stalk and sting its blind British prey.

7) The Thing from The Thing From Another World
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An "intellectual carrot" from, evidently, another world, this creature was mad, bad, and impervious to bullets. Although he didn't actually kill that many people, he was a right nuisance to the scientists that discovered him and refused to go without a fight. There's also evidence of at least a little intelligence, as he actually seems to regard Dr. Carrington's final plea before smacking him down.

6) The Vines from The Ruins
These creepy things may not have visual appeal going for them but certainly make up for it in craftiness. Even while being trapped in a Mayan temple for an untold amount of years, they still managed to evolve some devious tricks for offing wayward college students. Case in point: their habit of replicating sounds (including speech), so as to lure the unsuspecting into their grasp. That's some Terminator shit right there. While they clearly have your basic dreams of infection and domination on their mind, they are more sadistic than most killer plants, choosing to toy with and taunt their prey before striking. Also, they infect people and grow inside them, which we've seen before but rarely as disgusting as it is here.

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