It’s Officially Time to Start Hating Man of Steel

?You know, for all the bitching I do on TR, I actually try to keep an open mind about most things. I’m sure The Dark Knight Rises will be at minimum pretty damned good. I had decent hopes for the Green Lantern movie. And I was actually genuinely looking forward to Zack Snyder’ Superman movie Man of Steel… until now. Here’s the synopsis for the film, and see if it fills you with immediate hate and loathing like it did me:

“In the pantheon of superheroes, Superman
is the most recognized and revered character of all time. Clark
Kent/Kal-El (Cavill) is a young twentysomething journalist who feels
alienated by powers beyond anyone’s imagination. Transported to Earth
years ago from Krypton, an advanced alien planet, Clark struggles with
the ultimate question – Why am I here? Shaped by the values of his
adoptive parents Martha (Lane) and Jonathan Kent (Costner), Clark soon
discovers that having super abilities means making very difficult
decisions. But when the world needs stability the most, it comes under
attack. Will his abilities be used to maintain peace or ultimately used
to divide and conquer? Clark must become the hero known as “Superman,”
not only to shine as the world’s last beacon of hope but to protect the
ones he loves.”

Yes, ladies, and gentlemen, we’re getting Smallville: The Movie. Not content to just retell Superman’s origin for nth time, the whole fucking movie is apparently now his origin, as if 80% OF THE GODDAMN PLANET DIDN’T ALREADY KNOW WHAT HIS DEAL WAS. So we’ve gone from Superman as mopey, absentee dad to Superman as mopey, unsure boy trying to find his place in the world he doesn’t belong. Forget the fact that we’ve just had 10 fucking seasons of Smallville starring Superman as just that, why on god’s green earth won’t DC give us a Superman movie where Superman is… Superman? You know, a guy who will always do the right thing, will always try, without question or hesitation? A guy who feels he does belong on Earth, because it’s his fucking home, adopted or not?

Some heroes are made to be tortured and cursing their powers, like the X-Men and Spider-Man. But not Superman. He should be like Captain America, a hero from start to finish — except unlike Cap, he’s never a 98 lbs. weakling. At what point did DC just stop understanding their own characters? Seriously, they can’t do Superman, Green Lantern or Wonder Woman anymore, apparently. Thanks god they have Chris Nolan and Batman, or they’d be batting .000% at this point. (Via /Film)