And I bet that they won't even have "Lapti Nek" as one of the songs. Maybe "Jedi Rocks" if Lucas is feeling generous.
Oh god. I knew Star Wars Kinect was going to be bad, but I didn't know it was going to be THIS bad. I knew about the shitty podracing game, the shittier lightsaber "duels" and the borderline creepy Slave Leia dancing game -- a game where her crotch shoots fireworks to tell you how well you're doing -- and I say this as a man who has leered and ogled many a Slave Leia in my time. If you don't mind never knowing joy again, please watch the below video right through to the end:
When those two poor child actors go on to horrible drug addictions and careers in low-budget sheep pornography, we'll be able to trace their problems directly to starring in this commercial. And I thought I felt bad for Jake Lloyd.
When those two poor child actors go on to horrible drug addictions and careers in low-budget sheep pornography, we'll be able to trace their problems directly to starring in this commercial. And I thought I felt bad for Jake Lloyd.
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87 comments
If not for that horrible dancing game and atrocious YMCA cover, this game would look like a run-of-the-mill licensed game with an unusually fun minigame where you get to be a rancor and smash things. Lucas is probably out on a mission to turn Star Wars into a SpongeBob-like kids' franchise in order to get rid of the adult fans who dare defy his brilliant genius ideas.
Funny thing is that this will sell very well for M$, because of the very naive people who just want to play a lightsaber fight with the Kinect.
I work at a game store and I keep hearing about these very gullible people who "just can't wait" to play the "Best Star Wars" game for their 360.
I tell them my opinion, but the mostly ignore, because they are so caught up in their new Kinect toy.
I'm hoping that it sells bad like 3D Phantom Menace movie.
Lucas has to learn that we are not paying for his crap anymore.
And this Kinect game is crap sir!
"I'm hoping that it sells bad like 3D Phantom Menace movie."Sells bad?
The Phantom Menace 3D opened at $23 million, making it the #5 top-grossing film of all time.
Maybe in your "I hate Lucas" world it "sold bad", but in the real world, it is one of the biggest money-makers in the entirety of film history.
Hands-free motion controlled video-games. The problem with this technoloy is it makes you look stupid.
The game itself seemed ok to me. And the stromtroopers dancinf YMCA was funny
So is this how the Storm Troopers chill-ax after killing and burning uncle Owen & aunt Beru?
It's one thing for Lucas to ruin and defile Star Wars, but keep your stinking hands off of "YMCA"!
Holy shit...they brought back Greg Proops as the podrace announcer...
I guess the poor fellow was in dire need of a paycheck....
"It's fun to be in the Empire Today!"
Am I the only one who immediately thought of the carpet chain? You know, "800-588-2300-Empiiiiiiire! Today!"?
Other than that, this looks like pure diseased horse cock.
oko ok ok ok but i've still got the system on pre-order. will it be not terrible if you're drunk??? ....................................please?heavy sigh...
Lucas wins. He just does. He has successfully run Star Wars into the ground and now wants to obliterate anything good about it. I can only believe that the Village Troopers is a deliberate slap in the face of everyone over 30 who has loved Star Wars since childhood...
Oh boo hoo.
I'm just about 41. I don't feel my face has been slapped. I've enjoyed Star Wars for 34 years, and I thank Lucas for creating it.
You apparently weren't around for Christmas In The Stars, or the Star Wars Christmas Special, or Droids, or the Ewok movies, or any of the other fun, silly things in the Star Wars universe since 1978.
I feel bad for you if you can't have a little fun with the Star Wars characters and stories. If you think it's supposed to be serious and dire all the time, you MISSED THE POINT and should probably just go find something else to watch.
The Village Troopers were actually intended to be in the original movie but were accidentally cut during editing. Don't worry the new Blu-Ray Ultra edition has added them back in.
Remember the Long Live Play commercial where the video game characters discussed their greatest battles among one another and then saluted Michael? Off in the background in a darkened corner are three lonely stormtroopers whispering "to michael.... dance in hell" into their drinks and putting their blasters under their chins.
The only redeeming factor of that entire video is the fact that someday I'll be able to download that horrid cover of YMCA spewing Imperial Propaganda...
For some reason I read the last part of the headline as "Pon farr with Jar Jar".
The resultant image in my head is less horrifying than the video.
"And I thought I felt bad for Jake Lloyd."
I knew I wasn't the only one who felt bad for the little guy.... Even though he's older than I am.
Am I the only one who noticed how little effort the girl is putting into the dancing game? They literally couldn't pay her enough to care.
The thing is, I'm okay with the dancing Stormtroopers. Everything having to do with Star Wars is such a joke nowadays that it's not even worth the energy pretending the franchise is anything more than trumped-up harlot of it's former self.
There are many things wrong with this video, and my fellow commentors have hit on most of them...but I think the one thing that stands out most to me is that these kids are, until the last part, playing a motion game by themselves. I dunno...but I always feel silly playing those games solo. Isn't the half of the entertainment convincing other people to play in front of you so you can laugh at them while they look like fools?
Well, the dance part shows two kids together.
Mind, it looks like the video of the dance game is for a single player, not two... Only the center Stormtrooper gets words of crotch praise, he is also the only one that has limbs turn red (I'm guessing that marks mistakes) or highlighted blue (which I guess it getting it right).
I'd guess they just filmed actors making the motions while watching pre-recorded video. Although I wonder just how bad the actors were if the only "player and screen in the same scene" shots they found worth using were for the dance game.
EDIT: It is also interesting that this video went with Storm Troopers dancing instead of Slave Leia. I guess a woman in a metal bikini dancing for her slug-like master wasn't considered "family friendly".
Do they have a mini game where you have to step in all the piles of poop?
Or is that just a good description of the game in general?
I about fell out of my chair laughing at the last bit. It was so funny and bad. Then I noticed they'd changed the lyrics.
On the other hand, the lightsaber battles look like they'll be fun for the first three or so times you do them.
Those kids look soooooooo bored..
"Mom, can I PLEEEEEASE go do homework?"
*squints* The parts with the kids waving around looks weird to me... did they greenscreen in that living room background?
If so, I guess I can't help but admire their commitment to the Star Wars experience: greenscreening everything, no matter how unnecessary!
DID I JUST WATCH MOTHERFUCKING STORMTROOPERS DANCING TO MOTHERFUCKING YMCA? AND A COVER OF FUCKING YMCA AT THAT???? FUCK YOU ROB. FUCK YOU ALL THE WAY UP YOUR SISTER'S ASS RIGHT TO HELL.
Is there big budget sheep pornography? Have I been settling for low-end production values in the red hot serieses Inside Ewe and Ewe've Got What I need for no reason? I do really miss story in my sheep porn.
Awesome...someone actually got paid really fucking money to write a SW parody of YMCA....
God I want to get home and purge my self with some ME3.
Great and bad filk songs included as well! Pod racing looks kinda fun though. Episode 1 Racer for N64 was pretty fun, particularly for the ten bucks I spent on it.
Hey, I don't feel sorry for those two kids. Especially the boy. He's dancing with a girl already. I still haven't been able to do that.
