By Rob Bricken in
Nerdery, Video Games
Wednesday, Nov. 25 2009 @ 9:47AM
Remember when I told you that some crazy nerd from Guam was marrying his girlfriend in Japan? Although this was complicated slightly by the fact that the "girlfriend" was in fact a character from the Nintendo DS girlfriend sim Love Plus? Well, in case this whole thing wasn't disturbing enough, here's the wedding video courtesy of Lisa Katayama (who runs TokyoMango, a frequent Super Terrific Japanese Thing supplier) and Boing Boing. I'm not going to defend this knuckleknob, but Katayama says that the "marriage" is partially a performance art piece which, if true, is far more admirable than actually marrying a videogame. But I'm not 100% certain that it's true. Also, the fact that this dude says he'll do anything for his new "bride" enrages me. When all that constitutes is changing the batteries once in a while wiping off the DS' dual screens after he humps it it's pretty easy to be a good husband.
34 comments
Comments
Bugdodger said:
What the HELLLLL
ZADL said:
I keep thinking that she was originally drawn by a fat guy with a beard, who's got a full ashtray next to his keyboard, and who spends most of his free time on WOW.
Not that there's anything wrong with that, but it does tend to diminish the magic.
I wonder if he would walk her down the aisle, or something.
Anonymouse replied to ZADL:
People don't play WoW in Japan, it's never been released there. MMORPGs and online games in general aren't very popular in Japan at all, they still tend to play games together in person, at arcades, Ad-Hoc parties, etc..
Lo Pan said:
Wait, wiping off "things" after you hump them doesn't make you a good mate? Crap, Ive been going about this all wrong...
Tally replied to Lo Pan:
Turns out you can learn something from a man marrying a game. Go figure.
DoctorSmashy said:
I need to move to Japan. Because unless I do I will never be able to understand or even believe this. Plus then I can finally marry Lara Croft, with Cortana as my mistress for when Lara is away exploring.
MouthFullaHay replied to DoctorSmashy:
BACK OFF, PAL!! I called dibs on Lara in the other thread! But if I'm in a good mood, I'll MAYBE let you wipe her off after the humping.
MattK said:
And we're now one step closer to the future that Futurama predicted: marrying artificial beings.
He's gonna be heartbroken when he finds his DS in bed with his best man.
Fry: "She is more than just a piece of software!"
Lucy Bot: "Would you like to take a moment to register me?"
Fry: "Err, not right now."
Lucy Bot: "I will remind you later you hot stud you."
Fry: "So errr, what do you feel like doing?"
Lucy Bot: "Would you like to take a moment to register me?"
Bill said:
Dude looks like a loser.
Nicnac said:
Is that a stylus in your pocket ...
John Hazard said:
Can we stop seeing this guy and his stupid story everywhere?
Counterattack said:
The apocalypse can't come soon enough.
demoncat said:
i still wonder how the so called marriage would actully be considered a legal marriage since the bride is not real just computer graphics and pixels and do not want to know how he plans to consumate the marriage and what next the guy going to create kids the same way. talk about taking love of something to a new evil level that is totaly crazy
Anonymous said:
Isn't he going to eventually get bored when he realizes that she can only say a few scripted lines?
Matt replied to Anonymous:
nah, that sounds like most of my relationships. As long as the humping and wiping is good I'm sure he'll be ok with it.
Deacon Blues said:
Rob, the DS has a rechargable battery that can't be removed. First the OJ Terminator thing, now this. You're slipping, man.
Photoboy said:
The dude's getting married and he can't be bothered to make sure his girlfriend is looking her best running on a DSi or DSi LL?
She's going to look back in years to come and lament that she looked fat and dull in her wedding photos.
MnTL said:
I'm totally searching for porn of the wife of this dude.
Asat said:
The part that makes me annoyed is that his screen name is Sal9000, which is the name of HAL's little sister from "2010".
And THAT, dear readers, was the moment I knew that I was indisputably a nerd. Damn, I'm always a week late on these things. And yeah, he does kinda have an Ugly Betty thing going on.
NeoXorn said:
He is a crazy and lonely fucker! Jacking off to a Nintendo character...
Ellery said:
Hey, think of it this way...
If he is married to a game, there's no way his crazy, videogame loving genes can't possibly spread to the future people of Japanese children...
Carl said:
I thinking it should be legal to set this guy on fire. Yes. Yes, I do...
Soylent Robot said:
This isnt fair. This goof can marry his inanimate object but i cant marry a living human being that i love because we're the same gender? ;-; this is sad day
Specs said:
I swear to god I hope this guy stays in Japan and doesn't go back to Guam...last thing we need is some stupid freaks like this on the island
pork chop said:
some of those comments scrolling by were classic...
(translated)
"Is this some sort of school carnival (gakuensai)?"
"even if you get it, you're not going to be happy"
"dude's a little crazy..."
"did I hear that right? is somebody gonna [throw] the bouquet..?"
"do they do this in the States?"
"this is terrible! LOL"
"good looking guy LOL"
"I can't see"
"why the hell is the main camera moving like that?"
"camera needs to move [up arrow]"
"I'm crying"
"how are you going to make babies?"
"congratulations?"
the ws are like Japanese version of LOL
the 8s are for the sound of clapping (pachi-pachi)
not as sure about the 7s and 2s, think they were jokes
Xenos said:
Holy crap... Glen Beck was right... once we legalized gay marriage it was all down hill from there...
I kiiiid! I kiiiid!
Though wait until Japan makes persicom robots or some new line of talking real dolls.
Rob said:
So. Sad. Can't. Think. On a Joke.
Damn...
☆☆☆ jaganar ☆☆☆ said:
well atleast we know the reason why skynet hates humanity a fine peice of software like her marrying that O_o
personally if he was a decent looking guy i dont think Skynet would have a problem ,
but damn , talk about your vegas wedding .... sheesh.
no wonder the terminators show no mercy,
all this hate for one idjit = humanity is evil.
Crazy Elf said:
Oh man. I want to play that game, find that guy, and then break the news to him that his wife and I are dating.
