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YO MY GOD THE G.I. JOE RETALIATION TRAILER IS @#$%ING BRILLIANT


When Jon M. Chu was announced as the director of G.I. Joe: Retaliation, I expressed some concern, and by “concern” I mean “profanity.” I mean, Chu had only ever directed Step Up sequels and the Justin Beiber concert movie, so I don’t think I was wrong, technically, to have some reservations. And then, this happened:

The fucking G.I. Joe: Retaliation trailer came out. Holy shit, people. Guns. Real guns. Military vehicles. I think those were Rattlers that bombed the Joe camp. Epic locales. COBRA COMMANDER IN HIS FUCKING MASK. The Rock. THE ROCK STANDING LIKE A TOTAL BADASS IN A WELL WHILE BULLETS FLY ALL AROUND HIM. Ninjas. NINJA FIGHT ON THE SIDE OF A CLIFF. SNAKE EYES WITHOUT LIPS. Bruce Willis as the original Joe making a shitty quip! WE’RE THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS, PEOPLE.

If someone put a gun to my head and I had to find one thing to nitpick about, it might be that the A-Team-esque “Joes on the run” schtick is a little played out. However, if that schtick brings us scenes as breathtakingly fabulous as COBRA BANNERS BEING PUT ON THE WHITE HOUSE, I AM 100% OKAY WITH THIS.